Intimacy: Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time,...

By Anonymous - 24/04/2013 18:56 - United States - Huntington Park

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 464

You deserved it 9 862

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Same thing different taste

By illequipt - 16/03/2009 03:20 - Canada

Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my cock over my jeans and said, "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 204 566

You deserved it 32 065

By arctic1 - 27/05/2009 09:45 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 327

You deserved it 68 710

Feelings

By Anonymous - 29/07/2013 00:46 - United States - Beaumont

Today, my girlfriend and I were going at it doggy style, really fast, when she started laughing. I asked her what was so amusing and she giggled, "I can't feel anything in there." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 602

You deserved it 9 796

Like a virgin

By chchboy - 22/05/2012 05:05 - United States

Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 151

You deserved it 7 122

By sixsix - 24/12/2008 11:19 - France

Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 177

You deserved it 8 661

By herve - 22/05/2009 19:50 - Lebanon

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 023

You deserved it 11 617

By whatswrongwithit?:( - 30/09/2012 19:37 - United States - Chicago

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making out, I slowly took my clothes off and revealed my body to her for the first time. She looked, smiled, and said reassuringly, "Aww, don't worry. I know how it's supposed to look." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 474

You deserved it 3 671

By katie - 25/05/2011 08:23

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 973

You deserved it 19 174

By Anonymous - 30/06/2019 16:06

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I started to put my hands down his pants and jokingly said, "Sorry, I'm not very good at hand jobs." He replied, "I know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 928

You deserved it 786

By Anon. - 01/03/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 613

You deserved it 91 021

DocBastard 38

Wednesday 24 April 2013 23:44

You sure were hard... Hard to find.

cuddly_scorpion 4

Wednesday 24 April 2013 23:36

Well, shit.

Comments

Adhdkid107 9

Thursday 25 April 2013 0:14

Ouch bro, ouch...

CheeseHater 23

Thursday 25 April 2013 0:28

This is one of those cases where it is just not possible that he could deserve it. Like, you might say that "It's not the size of the boat but the motion in the ocean" but in this case it did and he could not do shit about it. This isn't something he could've prevented in any way. Maybe with surgery, but just no.

Louis1992 9

Thursday 25 April 2013 1:11

Lmfao!! Smh damn

revolution4ever 14

Thursday 25 April 2013 1:17

Jeans hide that well don't they? If you weren't wearing jeans, I'm truly sorry OP.

VeganVampyre 26

Thursday 25 April 2013 4:58

... I've never had a problem telling if a guy is hard because he's wearing jeans. They're not that thick, you know.

laya_fml 26

Thursday 25 April 2013 1:22

This reminds me of the FML where the girl reaches into the boy's pants and tells him to get hard when he was.

Stefanie88 24

Thursday 25 April 2013 1:58

I know, me too..

AKGrace 13

Thursday 25 April 2013 1:33

Your girlfriend sounds like a bitch. Any girl who cared or was the least bit considerate to your feelings wouldn't do that. Either that or she's just too young and immature to know the difference. Sorry man!

gameover18 17

Thursday 25 April 2013 2:19

LOLZ XD

jelly713 19

Thursday 25 April 2013 2:47

Guys tend to tuck their junk to the side, have baggy jeans with belts on, with lots of stuff in their pockets, or have it tucked into the elastic part of the underwear to have it flat on their stomach, which would be easy to feel up wrong & when it's dark, it's harder to tell. Unless she was pulling the pants down, I'm not so sure if she really feeling it. Was she looking down shamelessly? I'm curious. Making out & feeling up, it's possible she didn't get a good feel. Just saying. I feel bad for OP being told that.

license2chill 5

Thursday 25 April 2013 5:12

Well, I agree with you on the tucking and hiding, but there are not much square-footage down there to search.... Also based on her proactive approach, I would assume she's experienced.