Intimacy: Today, I was on a movie date with my boyfriend, when he asked...

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By Anonymous - 03/07/2013 16:25 - United States - Iowa City

Today, I was on a movie date with my boyfriend, when he asked for a handjob. I thought I was doing well until he sighed, took my hand off, and said he could finish on his own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 725

You deserved it 18 649

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Same thing different taste

Frustrated wank

By Anonymous - 05/10/2023 19:00

Today, I gave my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. Apparently, I was so bad at it that he eventually just slapped my hand away and angrily said he'd do it himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 591

You deserved it 318

By anonymous - 02/11/2015 03:13 - United States - San Francisco

Today, was the first time giving head to my boyfriend. He couldn't finish, so I tried a handjob. In the end he kind of pushed my hand away so he could finish himself off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 331

You deserved it 7 531

By valerie - 28/05/2011 01:04 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. It took ages for him to get excited, and in the end the only thing that blew up was him, saying, "Oh my god, just stop it already." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 058

You deserved it 18 799

By Anonymous - 30/06/2019 16:06

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I started to put my hands down his pants and jokingly said, "Sorry, I'm not very good at hand jobs." He replied, "I know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 941

You deserved it 801

By Highnapple - 04/03/2015 07:55 - Canada - Sarnia

Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 158

You deserved it 4 531

Pick your moments, dude!

By Anonymous - 11/10/2019 00:01

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 919

You deserved it 346

Gimme the D

By Anonymous - 07/02/2024 11:00 - United States - Citrus Heights

Today, I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend, but he kept falling asleep while I was giving him a handjob. Ugh, no sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 272

The moment when…

By wastedlove - 23/06/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, I had sex with this guy who I like very much. As he went to leave, I decided to give him one last thrill. I reached down his pants and started to rub and stroke him. He abruptly pulled my hand out. When I asked why, he pointed behind me. My mom had watched the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 117

You deserved it 74 067

Pure class

By DanceOnTheEdge - 20/07/2009 01:23 - United States

Today, I was riding in the car with my boyfriend. While he was driving, I held out my hand as an offer for him to hold it. Instead, he grabs me by the wrist and shoves my hand down his pants. Lovely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 714

You deserved it 19 391

Anticlimax

By Deidle-dee - 26/10/2010 16:37 - United States

Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for 6 years. Things got heated when we got back to his place, but he had trouble getting the condom on. As soon he got it on, he came. I told him it was ok, I'd help him get hard again. He said, "No thanks. I'm good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 007

You deserved it 4 706

Tpracingkg 15

Wednesday 3 July 2013 22:36

Practice makes perfect

spekledworf 18

Thursday 4 July 2013 0:39

I hope it wasn't in public. I work at a movie theater and have walked in on worse than handjobs. We don't appreciate it.

Comments

rott3n 6

Saturday 6 July 2013 0:01

Know one drives the bus like the bus driver

oped01 8

Sunday 7 July 2013 6:45

Now I know why the movie theater floor is sticky. I thought it was soda.

nickyp30 8

Monday 15 July 2013 5:48

It's pointless trying to do something to a man that he has perfected since age 14

johnkocache 2

Tuesday 16 July 2013 12:53

break up with him...you need more practice.

Ricin 9

Thursday 18 July 2013 16:44

God damn. So did he actually finish himself off?

amisenho 11

Tuesday 23 July 2013 19:49

Wow. Ungrateful, isn't he? He asks you, and he just pouts like a kid when it's not exactly like he wants it. Let me guess; he complains when the ketchup is above instead of under the cheese on his burgers, eh? Oh, well. You get an 'A' for effort, but practice makes all the difference.