Miscellaneous: Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she...

By Numbnuts - 08/03/2010 03:08 - United States

Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she was doing the dishes. I walked up behind her, touched her shoulder, and said "Poke". She then donkey kicks me straight in the nuts saying "Kick". I know now to never bug my mom when she's in a bad mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 351

You deserved it 38 555

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Same thing different taste

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

By Anonymous - 06/09/2019 20:03

Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 509

You deserved it 181

By MereLewis95 - 26/10/2011 08:58 - United Kingdom

Today, my mother called me urgently from the kitchen. Thinking she was hurt, I ran to her as fast as possible. She threw a wet cloth at my head and ran away, laughing her face off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 456

You deserved it 4 533

By civicman - 27/09/2009 02:19 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling on the couch with my girlfriend when I started to tickle her, she asked me to stop but I continued. She had a reaction, and kneed me in the happy sacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 679

You deserved it 66 271

By Anonymous - 07/11/2014 08:03 - Australia

Today, my mum was in a bad mood, so I tried to cheer her up by telling her I love her, and giving her a hug. She slapped me hard enough to leave a red, hand-shaped mark on my face, and told me to fuck off with my "sarcasm". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 742

You deserved it 3 762

By Anonymous - 16/08/2012 21:09 - United States

Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 666

You deserved it 47 764

By -_- - 05/07/2013 21:59 - United States - Munith

Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 583

You deserved it 5 226

By anon - 23/03/2015 02:24 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 328

You deserved it 2 936

Right in the snowglobes

By Anonymous - 29/09/2020 13:02 - United Kingdom - Tilehurst

Today, my sister kicked me in the balls just before I went into the bathroom, as she wanted to use the shower first. Later, when I came out of the bathroom, she kneed me this time in the same spot because apparently I always make a mess in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 200

You deserved it 198

By badmom101 - 16/05/2009 11:26 - Canada

Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 690

You deserved it 6 400

No touching!

By Noname - 27/01/2009 19:36 - United States

Today, at the mall my brother and I went to look at a vendor's items when my mom said not to touch anything. Thinking my brother was standing next to me, I saw him touching stuff so I smacked him in the arm and told him to stop. I turn to see that the old lady to my side was giving me a mean look. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 011

You deserved it 23 341

Daerauko 0

Monday 8 March 2010 9:11

good, stop irritating people

Firate 3

Monday 8 March 2010 9:12

If you're that bored, how about helping your mom with the dishes instead of being an ass?

Comments

alleyx3 0

Monday 8 March 2010 9:48

oh I thought it said "I know now to never bug my mom" that would make sense wouldn't it

bettadenne1 0

Monday 8 March 2010 10:07

alley wins 

null_fml 11

Monday 8 March 2010 10:11

"Donkey kicked"? As in, she kicked behind herself without turning around, right? So that means two things: she probably didn't hit your balls on purpose, nor very hard. TL;DR: Suck it up, whiner. YDI.

null_fml 11

Monday 8 March 2010 11:29

Coming soon to theatres: "Mom the Blackbelt!" ... Sure, it could happen, but that's what the "probably" is for.

TiffanyBlews27 0

Monday 15 March 2010 6:15

But is his mom a martial artist? nobody knows. chances are: NO! God, grow a brain, Snickers.

Sindyy 0

Monday 8 March 2010 10:13

This made me laugh. :O "Kick." xD

olliec 0

Monday 8 March 2010 10:25

Your mum is awesome. haha

thenumberblue 0

Monday 8 March 2010 10:27

I pity the fool that annoys their mom! (ydi)

Smilzen 0

Monday 8 March 2010 10:37

Don't complain; I'd imagine a donkey PUNCH would have been a real FYL.

thoughtcrimeno1 0

Monday 8 March 2010 10:48

falcon punch might have killed you.

lizardking7106 0

Monday 8 March 2010 10:37

She overreacted but it would have been hilarious to see Oh and a punch to the ovaries would have been the perfect reply haha

spellfire 0

Monday 8 March 2010 10:42

OP, you can still do it, but mind to follow some safety rules. How to give your mother an affectionate poke: 1. Approach your mother not from behind, but from the side, to give you an additional fraction of a second to dodge. 2. Wear a metal protective gear on your vulnerable body parts. 3. Use a long stick. But not a metal or wooden one. Use a harmlessly bending one, so that it wouldn't cause you any damage when she tears it out of your grip and attacks you with it. 4. When she's in a really bad mood, don't use a touch, but only voice poke. Mind to have a quick retreat prepared in case she chases you with the intention to kick you. 5. When she's in a really, really bad mood, realize that your mere presence might set her off. Leave the house and lay down low to save your life. Have a hideout prepared for such a case. Perhaps a male friend or a relative would be willing to take you in, after your explain the situation with the kick in the nuts.

Bawvie 1

Wednesday 10 March 2010 23:34

@49, LOL

clockworklolita 3

Monday 8 March 2010 10:44

I can't believe the number of people who've YDI'd this! Alright, it was a bit dickish for OP to purposefully try to annoy his mum, but how does him poking her in the shoulder mean he deserves to be kicked in the balls - something I'm lead to believe is not only excruciatingly painful but can also cause long term damage?