Transportation: Today, I was stuck in stand-still traffic for 5 minutes, before...

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By El Stupido - 12/06/2011 13:51 - Australia

Today, I was stuck in stand-still traffic for 5 minutes, before realizing I had stopped behind a parked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 196

You deserved it 58 449

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Same thing different taste

By becca - 21/08/2010 04:04 - United States

Today, I spent five minutes waiting by a stop sign. The two cars in front of me were taking a long time to move, so I began beeping and getting angry. Turns out, these cars were parked and I was holding up a line of traffic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 373

You deserved it 39 374

Classic

By Anonymous - 07/05/2021 17:01 - New Zealand

Today, I pulled up to an intersection behind a car waiting to turn left and we missed a whole set of lights. As I was getting frustrated that they weren’t going when the light was green, I realised I was waiting behind a parked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 249

You deserved it 1 074

By Anonymous - 09/04/2009 20:46 - United States

Today, I was in a hurry to get to work. I pulled impatiently behind a long line of cars to make a right hand turn. I sat there for 5 minutes. Turns out there wasn't a line to make a right hand turn. I had been waiting behind a line of parked cars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 847

You deserved it 70 608

Move!

By Kevin - 29/11/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I got stuck in traffic and angrily honked at the car in front of me. Then I realized it was a hearse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54

You deserved it 642

By Andre - 29/07/2010 10:56 - United States

Today, I got a parking ticket while standing beside my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 744

You deserved it 9 423

Tourism

By Jaymail - 11/10/2020 10:01 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was stuck in backed up traffic because of construction for so long that my phone actually listed where I was stuck in traffic as a place I visited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 122

You deserved it 98

By Noname - 21/02/2009 07:34 - United States

Today, I was stuck in what I thought was traffic on my way home from work. I started weaving in and out of traffic because it seemed to only be a few cars holding up the line. I get to the front of the line and I'd realized I just weaved through a funeral procession. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 126

You deserved it 58 341

By Awkward - 25/04/2011 18:38 - United States

Today, while driving on the highway, I got stuck in a traffic jam. Upon glancing over at the car in the next lane, I saw it was my ex as of a week ago. We sat in barely moving traffic right next to each other for half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 827

You deserved it 4 305

By last time I drive stoned - 08/12/2012 17:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was stuck at a red light on an empty road for ten minutes before I finally realised that not only was I looking at the wrong traffic light, it was also broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 425

You deserved it 25 985

Noooooooo!

By please don't back that thing up - 09/08/2013 05:00 - United States

Today, I stopped at a red light, when I noticed the car in front of me was in reverse. I honked at the driver, hoping he'd realize and place the car in drive. He thought the light turned green and immediately backed into me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 700

You deserved it 6 253

every1luvsvag 10

Sunday 12 June 2011 19:05

You didn't notice the other moving cars around you? You, sir, lack intelligence.

jerome1995 4

Sunday 12 June 2011 19:03

Epic fail.

Comments

Zetsumei101 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 22:52

Being an idiot is not an fml.

CallMeHush 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 22:57

Someone smoked their lunch today!

tbone666 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 22:59

was the parked car in the middle of the road or are you just an idiot???

NayNay14 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:02

dumb ass.

NinjaWithSwag 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:02

emmiep can you message me or add my msn?

gabeyxo 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:10

thats so freaking fumny

iPikaSaurus 3

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:12

that's nice

TheOnlyToaster 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:12

happened to me before, while taking my drivers test...I failed because of that

Maggie41909 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:15

has anyone here gotten their FML approved and gotten it posted.?

jackiemoonthepro 5

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:17

the other cars flying past must have been a bit of a give away

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend refused to have sex with me because I have ass acne. The reason I have ass acne is from working out to lose weight. I was trying to lose weight because he wouldn't have sex with me because I was too fat. I can't win. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 120

You deserved it 566

Today, I approached a cute girl at a club, and she started barking at me like a rabid dog. Thinking she might be mentally unhinged, I left, only to see the same girl laughing her ass off with her friends minutes later. When I went back over, her friends started barking at me too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 994

You deserved it 7 026

The Top

Today, I was cooking when I got jumped from behind by my friend's cat, who thought my back would make a great lookout perch. Yesterday he tried to sharpen his claws on me. Last time I looked in the mirror I didn't look like a tree trunk, but maybe I need glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 793

You deserved it 172

Today, during my work shift, my car got stolen and I had to walk home on the rain. While I was walking home, my stolen car drove by. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 038

You deserved it 243

Today, I had to convince policemen I’m not a victim of domestic abuse after I had to go to hospital for a stab wound for the second time since Xmas. I’m just hopelessly clumsy. I managed to stab myself with a screwdriver while opening a paint tin. Last time, it was a knitting needle while knitting Xmas jumpers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 192

Today, a woman I work with confessed her love to me, but when I turned her down, she accused me of being a playboy, a manipulator, and a liar who led her on. I'm quite openly gay, so in no way did I ever lead her on, and the only way she could have not known I was gay was if she walked around with her eyes shut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 092

You deserved it 134

Today, I have a UTI that spread to my kidneys, a yeast infection, and a herpes outbreak. Oh, and my period came this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 292

You deserved it 835

Today, my friend and I went boating. In the middle of the lake, we decided to jump in. We put our valuables in the boat and jumped in. When I tried to get back in the boat, it flipped over, and our cellphones, along with my car keys, are at the bottom of the lake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 185

You deserved it 57 416