Health: Today, I was sword fighting in a play when I accidentally hit...

By me - 30/04/2011 04:25 - United States

Today, I was sword fighting in a play when I accidentally hit the other person in the head. He called me a bitch and stormed off stage, leaving me alone with an audience of 50. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 249

You deserved it 5 205

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/11/2015 15:28 - United States - Jamestown

Today, I was in a play and had a battle scene. I got a little too into it and wound up twisting my ankle. The audience was treated to me screaming like a little girl before face-planting the stage a moment later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 437

You deserved it 3 553

By Anonymous - 20/04/2015 14:45 - United Kingdom - Leicester

Today, I had a theatre performance. I had to put on a lot of makeup for the role, and one of the guys said I looked nice. I smiled and said thanks. Seconds later, I'd been sucker-punched by his girlfriend for "flirting" with her man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 424

You deserved it 2 242

By Sue - 26/03/2011 15:41 - United States

Today, I co-starred in a production of Hamlet. Halfway through play, the actor playing Hamlet forgot his lines, threw a raging temper tantrum, screaming about how much he hated the play and how he wanted to go home in front of hundreds of audience members. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 103

You deserved it 3 534

By fthislyfe - 18/07/2011 07:09 - Netherlands

Today, in an amphitheater, someone hit the back of my head. As I turned around, the guy apologized and said he mistook me for his friend. I changed seats, and after a while, I got hit a second time. He was wrong again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 485

You deserved it 3 828

Inappropriate Billy Joel

By Anonymous - 18/04/2016 19:28 - United States - Carlisle

Today, I performed a piano piece at a school play. Everything went well until I got up and accidentally smashed my shin against one of the piano legs. Before I could bite my tongue, I'd already yelled "Fucking hell!" in front of about 50 second graders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 794

You deserved it 5 174

Do as I say…

By AllThatJazz - 15/04/2009 20:06 - United States

Today, I was stage-managing a school show. Some kids were goofing off backstage, so I yelled at them that they could hurt themselves. While walking back to my chair, I tripped over my own feet and fell 5 feet off the stage, shattering my cheekbone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 116

You deserved it 13 415

By northernlass - 20/09/2010 04:47 - United States

Today, I was singing and playing keyboards with my band on stage at a club. A drunken chick from the crowd tried to climb up onto the stage in her heels, fell, and grabbed the back of my mic stand to catch herself. And busted me in the mouth with my own microphone. Then she requested a song. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 937

You deserved it 2 677

By Anonymous - 13/12/2011 14:00 - Malaysia

Today, as part of my job as a performer, I had to show off my skills with a switchblade in front of an audience. A kid shot a rubber band at me. I then needed stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 133

You deserved it 3 138

By deven - 29/08/2009 22:58 - United States

Today, I saw a fight so I went over to try and break it up. Someone thought I wanted to join in, so he gave me an unexpected whap in the happy sacks, and I also got a bloody nose for my troubles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 737

You deserved it 44 797

By ko - 09/12/2012 00:25 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went to see a musical that some school friends had put on. At some point in the show, the main character kicked her leg up in the air, and her high heel flew off of her foot and into the audience. The shoe hit me square in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 132

You deserved it 2 174

imabeast17 0

Saturday 30 April 2011 12:09

Why is he mad? I thought the point of sword fighting was to hit each others "heads". Jeez I guess I've been doing it wrong.

bbedlock_fml 7

Saturday 30 April 2011 12:00

Don't play with knives!

Comments

mrahhhhh 21

Saturday 30 April 2011 12:51

Am I the only one who imagined a fruity guy lisping "you bitch!" and then walking hurriedly offstage? I know that's a false stereotype but goddammit sometimes things just pop into your head. :) No offense meant to anyone :).

MissBBGoodGirl 0

Saturday 30 April 2011 13:14

haha I thought the same exact thing!

ambowew 7

Saturday 30 April 2011 14:16

Yep. I imagined the gay fella in Legally Blonde who said those exact words.

laden_swallow09 34

Saturday 30 April 2011 16:54

Yah, you're not the only one who thought of that! XD

perdix 29

Saturday 30 April 2011 12:53

If you are "sword-fighting" on stage and hit the other guy in the head, you must have a massive weiner, but don't know how to use it for entertainment purposes. You should learn how to do DIck Tricks and be the American version of Puppetry of the Penis.

BugsBunny1 4

Saturday 30 April 2011 21:52

That would be an amazing career!

patiencek 0

Saturday 30 April 2011 12:58

try being on a stage in front of 500 and the person your in a scene with passing out. sooo scary! I would have dragged that crybaby back out there and told him to fight like a man! haha

aml6154 0

Saturday 30 April 2011 13:13

that other person is such a diva...wow

Jimster1712 0

Saturday 30 April 2011 13:56

lol , a classic

omgwtftoni 0

Saturday 30 April 2011 14:04

50? doesn't sound like a massive production. was this in your backyard? stop crying about it

rickolette 0

Saturday 30 April 2011 14:13

Maybe OP lives in a small town. Or people in her town aren't very interested in plays. No need to be an ass, gawd.

dgr8ing 0

Saturday 30 April 2011 14:35

it was probably a private school you dumbasses will never see one

joa76 3

Saturday 30 April 2011 18:17

I would think more people would go to a private school play than a public one, unless it's a really really small private school. Parents tend to be more involved with private school activities.

Grimmerie 31

Saturday 30 April 2011 20:02

i went to a private school of 300 students - kindergarten to grade 12. my public high school had nearly 2000.

skaterpaige 3

Saturday 30 April 2011 15:11

WAIT...only 50, what kind of play r u in??

Iswear 4

Saturday 30 April 2011 15:20

Your sword should NEVER get anywhere near his face. As a professional stage combatant, I would have been fired or fined. Learn how to handle the weapon before using it.

EKS1572 0

Saturday 30 April 2011 19:28

HE WASN'T USING A REAL SWORD! god some of u ppl are seriously screwed up!

Iswear 4

Saturday 30 April 2011 20:14

Just because you aren't using a real sword doesn't make it any less dangerous. ANY object swung with any force near the face is highly dangerous. And how does being safety conscious make me messed up?

BugsBunny1 4

Saturday 30 April 2011 21:54

Well OP isn't a professional stage combatant! Geez, he messed up give him a break!

Snowlight_fml 7

Sunday 1 May 2011 20:44

If the guy has enough energy to say "YOU BITCH" and storm out, he's absolutely fine.

nlr 9

Saturday 30 April 2011 15:27

50?! my school plays get almost 3,000 people and that's our full house record!

joa76 3

Saturday 30 April 2011 18:19

That's nice. Some people live in small towns. You know what it would take for our school plays to get 3000 people? Aside from the fact that everyone would have to stand smushed together and we would definitely be breaking the fire code limit, we would have to have every single person living in the school zone, including the entire nursing home, plus a good 1500 more.