Love: Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey...

By screwwyou - 28/09/2009 01:16 - United States

Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey wanna hear a joke?" I said "Yes." He said, "Our relationship." and walked away. He seriously dumped me through a one-liner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 135

You deserved it 5 134

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Same thing different taste

By rotezora - 02/09/2012 12:44 - Switzerland - Basel

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 538

You deserved it 3 598

By Emily - 17/12/2011 17:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via the medium of free-style rapping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 112

You deserved it 4 600

By confusedandnowsingle - 28/06/2013 12:23 - Finland - Espoo

Today, my boyfriend's proposal speech somehow ended with him breaking up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 672

You deserved it 4 318

By Anonymous - 12/08/2009 02:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend sent me a text saying to call him. When I did, it went straight to voicemail. It was a recording of him breaking up with me. He broke up with me over the phone, without even talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 798

You deserved it 3 290

Nightmare

By yeah - 25/10/2019 14:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. In Walmart. Over the loudspeaker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 914

You deserved it 191

By alaina2001 - 07/05/2015 22:22 - United States - Massillon

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because someone asked him if we were dating and he lied and said no. He said he didn't want to be a liar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 515

You deserved it 2 691

By mish - 22/09/2013 20:41 - United Kingdom - Leominster

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via Snapchat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 223

You deserved it 4 190

By Anonymous - 31/05/2013 04:16 - United States - Pleasant Grove

Today, I was texting my boyfriend when he said, "Hold up." Thinking it'd be funny, I ran and grabbed my copy of the movie Up, and took a picture of me holding it and sent it to him. He replied, "Getting real tired of your shit." Then dumped me for my "dumb taste in humor." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 586

You deserved it 15 007

By Jackie - 12/07/2011 07:14 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me using the "it's not you, it's me" speech with a slight variation, saying instead, "It's not me, it's you. And yes, I meant to say it that way round." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 361

You deserved it 6 128

By heartbroken - 22/01/2010 01:18 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, all because whenever I laugh I say "lol." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 245

You deserved it 114 123

blarrrr 0

Monday 28 September 2009 9:17

I always heard chicks dig a guy with a sense of humor Oh the irony

WellThatSuckz 14

Monday 28 September 2009 9:12

What an @$$hole!

Comments

DarknessToLight 5

Friday 1 July 2011 2:44

...zing?

stevenJB 25

Tuesday 18 October 2011 0:27

Stab him In the eye with a really hot frenchfry?

aaron2run 0

Thursday 15 December 2011 20:19

I would never do tat myself but you have to admit it was pretty funny. Douch move tho

MegaSolipsist 13

Monday 23 April 2012 23:42

Did you punch him in the face and say "How's that for a punch line?"

deusbag 5

Wednesday 2 May 2012 19:01

That really blows, but I did laugh a bit

ILoveZombieBoys 13

Friday 27 July 2012 1:46

**** him you're way too good for him

davestrider 0

Wednesday 3 October 2012 3:59

TA: hey ED wanna hear a joke? CA: wwhat sol? TA: your quadrant2

luvy 3

Wednesday 31 July 2013 20:01

CFB_FRS 27

Tuesday 8 April 2014 17:32

It's better than through text..

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 661

You deserved it 5 928

Today, during a intense orgasm I screamed, "You're my God!" at my husband. Afterwards, he told me I was blasphemous and reminded me that God smites those with false prophets. Needless to say, I think I'll just keep my mouth shut in the future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 479

You deserved it 162

The Top

Today, I got the DVD back from a dance concert I did. After watching it, I realised that I had a camel toe through the whole thing. Three and a half hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 776

You deserved it 7 333

Today, I had a doctor's appointment. I left with referrals to both a dermatologist and a mental health professional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 909

You deserved it 2 759

Today, in a 2-hour period at work, I had to talk to the cops, clean up shit and clean up vomit, yet none of these events were related. The worst part is, I work as a lifeguard and none of this is in the job description. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 483

You deserved it 125

Today, I learned that just because the actual part of the pan that does touch the stove isn't hot doesn't mean that the handle won't give you third degree burns, a broken nose from passing out from the pain, and an expensive trip to the emergency room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 506

You deserved it 6 909

Today, my boyfriend and I got into an argument. Naturally, I drove over to my best friend's house for comfort. My boyfriend saw me driving past his house and promptly broke up with me for being "a psycho stalker." She lives across the street from him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 073

You deserved it 6 289

Today, my wife of 18 years and I went to a party. We arrived and left separately, and didn't even talk to one another while there. I miss her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 138

You deserved it 236

Same thing different taste

Nightmare

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