Transportation: Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use...

By Anonymous - 12/08/2011 10:40 - Australia

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 161

You deserved it 2 971

Halloween: Terror and Laughter
Discover stories that combine fright and humor for an unforgettably funny Halloween. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By longest minute - 25/05/2016 11:28 - United States - Cypress

Today, I was peeing in a public bathroom when a guy walked in and passed by 4 open urinals to use the one next to mine. After feeling his gaze for a second, I confronted him with my own, in hopes he would stop. Instead, I stared into a stranger's eyes until I finished peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 725

You deserved it 2 674

By toosmall - 31/01/2009 21:40 - United States

Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business. He stared over at me, looked down, laughed and then left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 606

You deserved it 2 608

By Anonymous - 26/09/2011 18:52 - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 059

You deserved it 3 578

Dude! Boundaries!

By devinbyrne - 05/03/2011 20:26 - United States

Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 741

You deserved it 3 760

By Anna - 13/07/2013 04:40 - United States - New York

Today, I was using a public restroom. As I lowered my pants, a man's head and arms popped out over the divider. He took a picture and immediately rushed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 332

You deserved it 3 222

By DrewK - 14/05/2013 20:09 - United States - Great Falls

Today, I went into the men's restroom and started peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zipped up and walked away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 887

You deserved it 4 526

Stranger danger

By Anonymous - 20/11/2014 16:35 - United States - Calhoun

Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying, "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 562

You deserved it 2 814

By not cool - 28/06/2013 05:16 - Australia - Sunnybank

Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 822

You deserved it 3 178

By fviz - 07/02/2013 09:51 - United States

Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 175

You deserved it 2 804

By hardee fucking har yourself, sir - 07/08/2013 22:00 - United Kingdom - Stockport

Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 597

You deserved it 4 048

smashingdiscover 0

Friday 12 August 2011 18:48

Enemy spotted

annajane 0

Friday 12 August 2011 18:48

Pretended to? You sure about that?

Comments

Acaprice14 9

Friday 12 August 2011 20:37

Sam Turret, on the way.

V19Spartan 1

Friday 12 August 2011 20:37

Take out your Sam turret and shot down the spy plane- punch him in the dick

natevb96 0

Friday 12 August 2011 20:39

At least he didn't say " care package ready for direction show us where you want it"

celticcchapman 0

Saturday 13 August 2011 3:10

Haha agreed o.o

upyourzlolz 11

Friday 12 August 2011 20:44

Time for the counter-spy plane... **** it. Nuke him.

kidsmeal1231 0

Friday 12 August 2011 20:49

Counter spy plane that bitch! Lmao

lolatlifehahaha 0

Friday 12 August 2011 20:54

People who suggested OP pees on Mr. Pervert: hasn't it occurred to you that might actually turn him on?

blackbelt25 12

Friday 12 August 2011 20:58

Should've said "sam turret inbounded" and pissed on the guys shoe

hyden121 2

Friday 12 August 2011 21:04

That is when you backhand his sorry butt across the room... Stupid pervs...

BighornB 0

Friday 12 August 2011 21:07

Knock him on the ground and drop a brown bomb on his face and say kamikaze!

bkalina 0

Friday 12 August 2011 21:09

creepy!

Keywords

Animals Cats Gross Health Relatable Poopoo peepee Parents Creepy Kids Scary Mental health Miscellaneous Cold weather Embarrassing Love Tinder Dating Cute Work Transportation Cops Awkward Crush Sports Teachers Education AITA Weddings Public freakouts Mother in law

The Top

...

I agree, your life sucks 4

You deserved it 9

Today, I came to realize that dating as an overweight girl sucks. I can’t get a guy to commit/stay to save my life. I go on dating apps, and when we exchange photos or meet in person they abandon me. I know that this will change if I lose weight, but is it wrong for me to want to be loved for who I am? FML

I agree, your life sucks 408

You deserved it 546

The Top

Today, my mother threw an egg at my face with force because I returned home 5 minutes late to dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 044

You deserved it 5 630

Today, I'm at the ER because my 13-year-old nephew ate an aromatic candle that smelled like chocolate. He saw it on my dresser and actually though it was chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 902

You deserved it 120

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 447

You deserved it 7 419

Today, I tried to create the perfect playlist for a road trip. I spent a long while curating it, but when I hit the shuffle button, it started playing a bunch of annoying nursery rhymes. Apparently, I'd accidentally merged my list with my nephew's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 352

You deserved it 207

Today, while having some "personal" time, I felt intense pleasure and moaned. I learned that my own moaning prevents me from reaching my peak. I'm my own turn off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 955

You deserved it 6 615

Today, I crashed my car. I saw a deer getting ready to run into the middle of the road, and I was very sleepy, so I panicked and slammed on the brakes, causing me to lose control of the car on the wet road. After I hit a tree, I realized that the deer was a plastic lawn ornament. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 196

You deserved it 46 185

Same thing different taste

Dude! Boundaries!

Stranger danger

Top comments

Comments