Money: Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some...

By dude - 24/03/2009 20:52 - United States

Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some change. I planned to give a couple dollars but after pulling out my wallet exposing my cash, the bum beat me unconscious. The bum is a 5'0" tall woman; I'm a 6'2" male out $200. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 142

You deserved it 34 271

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 21:46 - United States - Tampa

Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 815

You deserved it 43 271

By pinkrazrgirl247 - 03/07/2009 06:29 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 437

You deserved it 52 216

By whathehell - 27/04/2013 08:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 140

You deserved it 3 643

Smooth criminal

By Anonymous - 28/04/2012 01:55 - United States - Darien

Today, I was walking down the street, when a little old lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 673

You deserved it 2 578

Captain Badass

By NotAsToughAsHeThinks - 14/02/2011 03:25 - United States

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 162

You deserved it 54 043

By Tanner - 16/07/2011 06:23 - United States

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 449

You deserved it 3 684

By unknown - 12/06/2013 17:33 - United States - Tulare

Today, I was walking to the gym when the woman in front of me dropped some cash. I picked it up and tried to get her attention. She saw the money and thought I was trying to pay her to sleep with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 003

You deserved it 4 483

By hobosarea-holes - 14/08/2010 23:10 - United States

Today, I picked up a penny off the street for good luck on my job interview. A few seconds later, a hobo beat me up, took my wallet, and ran off. The whole ordeal made me late for the interview. So much for good luck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 296

You deserved it 3 776

By who_could_it_be - 06/08/2009 13:35 - Canada

Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 558

You deserved it 570 263

By Anonymous - 23/01/2010 08:05 - United States

Today, I was walking on a main street downtown. Suddenly, I felt someone slap my butt. I turned around, expecting to be my girlfriend who was to meet me there and almost gave an old homeless man a kiss on the cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 856

You deserved it 4 481

MonkeySpeaks 4

Wednesday 25 March 2009 1:06

Honestly, have you not learned to never take out your wallet or show how much cash you have on the streets? Thats just basic.

Bubs_fml 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 1:05

Gotta watch out for that Falcon Punch. Even homeless women can do it.

Comments

Fields4mint 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 22:28

That's honestly what you get for letting her see the contents of your wallet. Desperate people will go to some pretty bad lengths to get what they want.

o_x_fml 7

Sunday 5 April 2009 22:58

Rofl, YDI.

barbie0417 0

Friday 10 April 2009 6:01

reallly? how the fck does a 5'0 women whoop ass on a 6'2 male? that honestly makes no damn sense to me. if yu have a good explanation then bother to explain.

y2jared 0

Friday 10 April 2009 20:41

the sad thing is i belive this. my ex and i were talking bout this last night and you have the same luck as i do...im sorry lol...

mimblewimble_fml 0

Monday 13 April 2009 18:16

Wow. Dumb mistake on YOUR part. Never give homeless people money. Give them food or clothes. But never money.

24788 6

Wednesday 29 April 2009 7:06

Don't help the person out next time. It sucks, but homeless people have nothing to lose.

MajorTom85 0

Sunday 17 May 2009 9:50

Yeah, I have a rule... If I have a few dollars in my wallet, I may give the bum some of it, but if there's a lot of money, i just don't take my wallet out. I don't want people to see that I have 200 bucks in my wallet and say "That's all you can spare?" Because I'll just want to take my money back.. Also, what did she do to knock you unconscious? Did you defend yourself at all? How much do you weigh? Did she just go nuts on you? Are you handicapped?

bsaucedo 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 15:49

im embarrassed for u .

cmac86 23

Wednesday 3 June 2009 5:54

Don't give them money. They're just going to use it for drugs. If they are really in need of help they can go to institutions that are set up for them. OR you can carry coupons for mcdonalds or something. They'll have to take it because they want something rather than nothing, and if they don't it blows their cover. If they don't they're just asshole, which most are anyway.