Money: Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some...

By dude - 24/03/2009 20:52 - United States

Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some change. I planned to give a couple dollars but after pulling out my wallet exposing my cash, the bum beat me unconscious. The bum is a 5'0" tall woman; I'm a 6'2" male out $200. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 142

You deserved it 34 271

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 21:46 - United States - Tampa

Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 815

You deserved it 43 271

By pinkrazrgirl247 - 03/07/2009 06:29 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 437

You deserved it 52 216

By whathehell - 27/04/2013 08:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 140

You deserved it 3 643

Smooth criminal

By Anonymous - 28/04/2012 01:55 - United States - Darien

Today, I was walking down the street, when a little old lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 673

You deserved it 2 578

Captain Badass

By NotAsToughAsHeThinks - 14/02/2011 03:25 - United States

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 162

You deserved it 54 043

By Tanner - 16/07/2011 06:23 - United States

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 449

You deserved it 3 684

By unknown - 12/06/2013 17:33 - United States - Tulare

Today, I was walking to the gym when the woman in front of me dropped some cash. I picked it up and tried to get her attention. She saw the money and thought I was trying to pay her to sleep with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 003

You deserved it 4 483

By hobosarea-holes - 14/08/2010 23:10 - United States

Today, I picked up a penny off the street for good luck on my job interview. A few seconds later, a hobo beat me up, took my wallet, and ran off. The whole ordeal made me late for the interview. So much for good luck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 296

You deserved it 3 776

By who_could_it_be - 06/08/2009 13:35 - Canada

Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 558

You deserved it 570 263

By Anonymous - 23/01/2010 08:05 - United States

Today, I was walking on a main street downtown. Suddenly, I felt someone slap my butt. I turned around, expecting to be my girlfriend who was to meet me there and almost gave an old homeless man a kiss on the cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 856

You deserved it 4 481

MonkeySpeaks 4

Wednesday 25 March 2009 1:06

Honestly, have you not learned to never take out your wallet or show how much cash you have on the streets? Thats just basic.

Bubs_fml 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 1:05

Gotta watch out for that Falcon Punch. Even homeless women can do it.

Comments

The_Hunger_Games 4

Monday 10 September 2012 7:13

Your sex doesnt matter female and male are evenly matched

piggybits 14

Saturday 22 February 2014 13:24

Wait.. How does a 5 ft tall person even see inside the wallet of someone so high up? Did u stick your arms down low so she could take a look?

lokland 12

Friday 25 April 2014 23:11

YDI for assuming her gender mattered in a fight. Sexist much?

ChaoticQuiet 11

Thursday 5 June 2014 13:59

I'm not really surprised, most guys refuse to hit a woman, even if they are being assaulted. Which of course is a good moral, escape is a wise one also though.

RhineBl 17

Wednesday 18 June 2014 21:02

I CLICKED YDI OMFG MY BAD SORRY

sexaybitch 14

Thursday 19 June 2014 15:49

Hey but cheer up, OP! Now she can get some food! Or nice clothes for a job interview. You probably made her day!

tuckit 28

Sunday 22 June 2014 1:57

Well now you know not to pull out your wallet in front of a bum.

Drake_The_Dragon 23

Wednesday 15 October 2014 22:56

Why does it matter that she was a women?

hman1025 17

Thursday 31 December 2015 19:01

Tall doesn't equal strong

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 24 August 2016 14:28

Looks like time to carry a little bit of cash on you or have a couple dollars in your pocket not with your wallet if you are feeling generous...hope you're okay OP...