Money: Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some...

By dude - 24/03/2009 20:52 - United States

Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some change. I planned to give a couple dollars but after pulling out my wallet exposing my cash, the bum beat me unconscious. The bum is a 5'0" tall woman; I'm a 6'2" male out $200. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 142

You deserved it 34 271

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 21:46 - United States - Tampa

Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 815

You deserved it 43 271

By pinkrazrgirl247 - 03/07/2009 06:29 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 437

You deserved it 52 216

By whathehell - 27/04/2013 08:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 140

You deserved it 3 643

Smooth criminal

By Anonymous - 28/04/2012 01:55 - United States - Darien

Today, I was walking down the street, when a little old lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 673

You deserved it 2 578

Captain Badass

By NotAsToughAsHeThinks - 14/02/2011 03:25 - United States

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 162

You deserved it 54 043

By Tanner - 16/07/2011 06:23 - United States

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 449

You deserved it 3 684

By unknown - 12/06/2013 17:33 - United States - Tulare

Today, I was walking to the gym when the woman in front of me dropped some cash. I picked it up and tried to get her attention. She saw the money and thought I was trying to pay her to sleep with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 003

You deserved it 4 483

By hobosarea-holes - 14/08/2010 23:10 - United States

Today, I picked up a penny off the street for good luck on my job interview. A few seconds later, a hobo beat me up, took my wallet, and ran off. The whole ordeal made me late for the interview. So much for good luck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 296

You deserved it 3 776

By who_could_it_be - 06/08/2009 13:35 - Canada

Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 558

You deserved it 570 263

By Anonymous - 23/01/2010 08:05 - United States

Today, I was walking on a main street downtown. Suddenly, I felt someone slap my butt. I turned around, expecting to be my girlfriend who was to meet me there and almost gave an old homeless man a kiss on the cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 856

You deserved it 4 481

MonkeySpeaks 4

Wednesday 25 March 2009 1:06

Honestly, have you not learned to never take out your wallet or show how much cash you have on the streets? Thats just basic.

Bubs_fml 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 1:05

Gotta watch out for that Falcon Punch. Even homeless women can do it.

Comments

bradley5055 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 4:16

bums arnt ppl so dont acknowledged them or ull get beat (if she has the strength to beat u she is strong enough to work so dont give em money give ur money to united way or something they dont buy drugs with the money u give em)

Jbomb01 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 4:27

its called the GYM, use it next time

hugh_jepenis 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 4:31

Giving homeless people money might be a bad thing... They might spend it to buy more drugs... But WOW lol did anyone see you? They coulda called the police =O

save_me_08 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 4:34

I just want to say... that whole "it's not the size, it's how you use it" doesn't only pertain to one's dick size...

napalm_fml 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 4:49

This is why you never, ever give to the homeless. I've walked down the street with small change jangling in my pocket and I say no. But who the **** takes out their wallet for a ******* bum in the middle of the street?

kellster 2

Wednesday 25 March 2009 4:51

Why were you carrying that much cash on you? And exposing it to a homeless person? I used to work with homeless people, and I can tell you, it's so dehumanizing that it makes people desperate. If I was a homeless person, I can't say that I wouldn't have done the same thing if I'd seen a wad of cash like that. Regardless, good for you for trying to do a good thing. I'm sorry it turned out so badly! I hope it won't make you bitter and jaded.

braFTW 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 5:03

#3 Netx time, be prepared.

Saya_nee_chan 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 5:04

BAHAHAHA. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE SHORT PPL. I'm 5'0"! We may be tiny but we're tuff >:)

MILF_HUNTER 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 5:05

HAH man up pussayyy!!! for next time: **** PUNT

TouchDown_fml 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 5:06

Well I'm hope she spent it on crack or something, I would rather have a bum, use my money for drugs so they can trip for 1-??? hours. Who ever said give them a bagel: That's not nice, that's just gonna make them thirsty :s