Animals: Today, I was walking my dog when, as usual, he did his business...

By gera3gera - 07/10/2009 02:07 - United States

Today, I was walking my dog when, as usual, he did his business in the grass and stepped off to the side. I squatted and reached for the bag when my dog spotted another canine. He lunged forward in excitement and I landed face forward in the feces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 810

You deserved it 4 128

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By BaliTheDog - 24/03/2013 23:01 - France

Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 020

You deserved it 97 596

By mraow123 - 30/05/2009 05:04 - United States

Today, I was walking my dog but every time he looked like he was about to "go", he became uninterested with the spot and kept walking. I, following behind, tripped over a bump in the sidewalk and face planted. My dog then finally urinated, all over my aching body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 394

You deserved it 4 660

Another fine mess

By wow - 16/05/2019 00:05

Today, I was walking my dog when he did his business. He then stepped all in it and coated his paws. As I was struggling with him, I slipped and landed butt-first into his steaming pile. My boyfriend nearly fainted from laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 784

You deserved it 341

By Anonymous - 10/11/2011 17:07 - Ireland

Today, I stepped in a pile of dog shit. While trying to get it off by wiping my foot on the grass, I stepped in another pile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 832

You deserved it 7 670

Pick it up

By Cassie - 02/05/2011 00:21

Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 391

You deserved it 50 991

By Anonymous - 28/12/2010 08:13 - United States

Today, I was walking dogs for the animal hospital I work for. I accidentally dropped the leash, and in my haste to retrieve it, I frantically grabbed the ground. I got the leash, and a handful of fresh dog poo emitted from the dog I was walking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 661

You deserved it 5 479

By AD240Z - 16/12/2016 11:39

Today, while walking my dog in the darkness, I bent down to pick up his poop. I screamed like a little girl as his morning turd leapt up my arm, covering my hand and jacket sleeve in soggy poop. My dog had curled one out onto a dozing frog. I skipped breakfast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 612

You deserved it 646

Handful

By Mary - 19/10/2009 01:11 - France

Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 830

You deserved it 6 934

It wasn't me, or him

By ev_lyn_aw - 17/05/2017 04:00

Today, today while walking my dog in a different part of town, a man ran screaming out of his house, and threw a plastic bag at me. It was dog poop. It was the first time I'd ever walked in front of his house with my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 891

You deserved it 286

Pull!

By buttpicker - 19/04/2010 23:24 - United States

Today, I was walking my dog and he stopped to take a crap. While he was doing his business, I saw something white coming out of his butt that just wouldn't budge. He started whimpering and I stepped in to help him. I pulled out an entire plastic bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 586

You deserved it 4 595

allmidnighteyes 10

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:20

Oh, this brings a whole new perspective to getting shitfaced...

yaddameena 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:18

haha sheeet man. literally.

Comments

unfortunate_13 5

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:17

this site gives so many great arguements for why people shouldn't keep pets.

Gregory7 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:32

lol u should see the fml that im trying to get up about my dog

MimiKnox 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:35

yeah true.....but shit happens right? (no pun intended)

allmidnighteyes 10

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:37

oops ignore this one. comments are messed.

QWERTYDave 0

Thursday 8 October 2009 9:26

Uhm you are mean to dogs. And if this happend to me, I'd take that dog home, beat the shit out of it and then give it a bone, say sorry, feel satisfied and have a dog that still loves me...

GreenHacker 0

Monday 12 October 2009 3:43

YDI for not cleaning up after your dog. And for being weak.

SKYblue_fml 1

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:18

I think I just threw up a little... :

popoman 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 22:24

Yum!

yaddameena 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:18

haha sheeet man. literally.

Raiders714 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:19

That's frigin hilarious lmfao

Jiplo 18

Saturday 17 May 2014 4:36

It's even more so when you imagine OP's dog being a small dog like a Wiener dog or something.

allmidnighteyes 10

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:20

Oh, this brings a whole new perspective to getting shitfaced...

redbluegreen 40

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:27

I thought we proved that with a few other FMLs. The shit just keeps flying in, doesn't it?

allmidnighteyes 10

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:28

Gurrl, it's a ******* shitstorm.

timtam24 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:22

oh dude that's so shitty

zach329 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:34

What does OP mean?

MimiKnox 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:36

Optimus Prime

null_fml 11

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:42

Ostrich Piss

allmidnighteyes 10

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:44

OMNOMNOM PANCAKES

timtam24 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:51

Oversized Penis

allmidnighteyes 10

Wednesday 7 October 2009 9:57

Octopus Placenta

flying_vegan 0

Wednesday 7 October 2009 10:02

Old Porpoise.

unfortunate_13 5

Wednesday 7 October 2009 10:03

haha the pancakes one wins!

allmidnighteyes 10

Wednesday 7 October 2009 10:58

The moon mistress LIES through her HEATHEN teeth. Clearly, her being a moon mistress makes her a pagan deity, one NOT of the Church of Salem, which is punishable by DEATH. She shall be burned at the stake on the morrow on account of her being a witch, gentlemen.