Intimacy: Today, I was walking to bed in fancy panties and a tight black...

By Anonymous - 24/01/2011 19:43 - United States

Today, I was walking to bed in fancy panties and a tight black tank top. My husband exclaimed, "This is the best part about being a grown up!" He was talking about the ice cream he was eating in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 709

You deserved it 4 835

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Same thing different taste

By a268 - 02/02/2009 09:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I came home early from work and discovered my husband wearing a black babydoll nightdress, black stockings and high heels... He says it helps him to relax. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 344

You deserved it 3 337

Hidden secret

By anonymous - 01/10/2016 09:00 - Australia - Tennyson

Today, I was with my boyfriend. He got up, shut the blinds and turned around to say, "I don't usually shut the blinds, but no one can see this." Assuming we were going to have sex, I took my pants off. He asked me what I was doing, then sat down to eat an entire tub of ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 297

You deserved it 2 147

By sirswank - 10/08/2017 13:00

Today, after giving my kids a lengthy bedtime lecture about the merits of being responsible, I thought about all the chores I had left to do, promptly ate ice cream in the shower, and went to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 019

You deserved it 1 797

By Tonya - 28/06/2009 03:01 - United States

Today, I left the house for a while and when I came back my husband was wearing my lacy lingerie. He looks better in it than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 242

You deserved it 7 780

By Anonymous - 27/06/2014 23:50 - United States - Parker

Today, I put on some sexy lingerie, ready to have some fun with my husband. I found him in the living room, opening a bag of doritos in front of the TV. He saw me and understood. Then he looked back at the doritos, then back at me and said gravely, "No way, babe. No way." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 927

You deserved it 7 677

By Anonymous - 30/04/2013 18:24 - United States - Pompton Plains

Today, I got home from work and found my girlfriend waiting for me in some skimpy lingerie. She ended up pushing me onto the bed, and as I lay there, expecting to be pleasured, she pulled out a pair of adult-sized footsie pajamas and dressed me in them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 967

You deserved it 8 441

By sissica - 11/02/2009 23:52 - United States

Today, when my husband got home from work, I was standing in the kitchen, wearing nothing but stilletos. He asked me to make him hot chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 195

You deserved it 6 630

By Anonymous - 03/01/2011 08:42 - United States

Today, I put on a lacy dress with nothing underneath and walked nonchalantly into the living room. My husband took one look at me, let out a heavy sigh and said, "Right now?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 770

You deserved it 5 061

Turn it off

By Anonymous - 26/03/2022 06:00

Today, I got dressed up in lingerie for my boyfriend. He looked at me, said, "Nice," then went back to watching TV and drinking beer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 159

You deserved it 171

The art of seduction

By Anonymous - 26/10/2020 19:58

Today, I took a bath and dressed in a skimpy lingerie. I sat on the couch for an hour and a half before giving up and putting on my boyfriend's old t shirt. It was then that he decided to comment. On the t shirt I was wearing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 450

You deserved it 227

bcoolplz 1

Monday 24 January 2011 22:31

i love ice cream too

Doortje 29

Monday 24 January 2011 22:40

Just say you have something else for him to eat.

Comments

Smashley91 2

Tuesday 3 January 2012 4:45

...he's right

SpeakOutLoud 1

Thursday 9 February 2012 3:07

Welll you gotta admit...it's true

cheer4everever 0

Saturday 18 February 2012 8:03

So, I get to eat ice cream in MY bed. And I'm 13 so HA!!!

myahnicole 2

Wednesday 6 June 2012 12:31

Did you even look good in the tight tank top OP?

noncom 12

Monday 21 January 2013 3:37

Is your husband by any chance "Peter Griffin".

NellyFC35 19

Sunday 3 March 2013 23:53

That's kind of adorable though.....don't take it personal :-)

JayThrntn 9

Wednesday 13 November 2013 14:25

I would have dropped the ice cream .. And pulled out my phone for a photo shoot! :)

jaqlove 22

Wednesday 4 February 2015 20:28

Me lol

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The Top

Today, my dad agreed to let me borrow the car to go rock climbing with my friends. He'd just filled it up with gas, which is how I realized halfway back home that one of my "friends" had siphoned well over half the gas straight out of the tank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 896

You deserved it 2 259

Today, yet again I had to lie to a date about what I do for a living, because every time I tell someone the truth, that I work in private equity, they have some choice words about "people like me ruining things" and "ruining the housing prices." I feel like an evil James Bond or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 154

You deserved it 550

The Top

Today, I tracked down my birth dad. He lives in a massive house, with a wife and two kids, 3 cars and a fucking sailboat on the drive. My mom and I grew up in poverty, but I was calm when I confronted him. He had his gardeners throw me into the street like I was inconvenient trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 693

You deserved it 278

Today, I went outside to smoke a cigarette. When I started to head back in, I saw a shadow move across my bedroom window. I live alone, so I waited outside and called the police. They came and investigated, only to drag my naked boyfriend out, where he promptly dumped me. I forgot our 2-year anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 831

You deserved it 1 727

Today, I received an e-mail telling me the job offer I got last week was rescinded. Apparently, the memes I share on my Instagram page are "tasteless" and don’t fit the company’s values. I forgot my profile is public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 1 888

Today, I was incredibly bored during a long bus journey, so I played chess against my e-book reader. On the lowest difficulty. I lost 27 times in a row. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 430

You deserved it 945

Today, after being with the company for over 3 years, I realised nobody really knows my name. This was after my boss was walking around a new staff member and couldn't introduce me. Neither could my colleague, who's been sitting next to me for the last 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 176

You deserved it 3 954

Today, I was sitting in my car waiting my shift to start. I must've fallen asleep because I woke up to a call from my boss firing me. I was in the parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 084

You deserved it 23 535

Same thing different taste

Hidden secret

Turn it off

The art of seduction

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