Miscellaneous: Today, I was with my friends at Burger King. While we were eating,...

By stephiexbabexx - 15/01/2010 21:27 - United States

Today, I was with my friends at Burger King. While we were eating, I placed my cellphone on the tray, not realising that I'd left it there until after I emptied my tray into the bin. When I got it out of the trash, it was covered in soggy, sticky garbage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 825

You deserved it 39 473

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Same thing different taste

By gravycoveredblackberry - 19/11/2009 23:37 - United States

Today, I had my new Blackberry Curve sitting on my lunch tray. Unthinkingly, i tossed it into the garbage can. 10 minutes later i realized I had thrown it away and spent the next hour searching through six garbage cans of half-eaten food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 402

You deserved it 30 086

Storage wars

By Will - 19/08/2021 08:02

Today, I went without my phone all day, because my roommate moved it. Because I'd left it in the fridge. On top of a bucket of KFC. Which he ate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 267

You deserved it 892

Smooth

By HungryGirl - 24/10/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, I went to McDonald's to get breakfast. I sat my food down at a table and went to get some napkins and a straw. I returned to the table to find that my food was gone, and could hear nothing but "SUCKKAAAA" trailing from the entrance to the restaurant. Some jerk stole my meal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 523

You deserved it 9 798

By pplsuck - 25/09/2012 23:57 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 320

You deserved it 2 779

By Anonymous - 08/09/2011 19:51 - United States

Today, I went to my favorite drive-in burger joint for dinner. As I was nearing the end of my burger, I grabbed a cup from the cup holder that I thought was filled with soda. Instead, I got a mouthful of dip spit that a friend left in my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 413

You deserved it 8 018

By can't eat paper - 11/05/2014 01:34 - United States

Today, after a long day at work, I was starving, so I stopped by the drive-through for something to eat. When I got home and hurriedly opened the bag, all I found inside was napkins. Thanks, McDonald's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 794

You deserved it 11 409

Sticky situation

By CodyS - 03/09/2013 05:03 - United States - Rocky River

Today, on my lunch break, I ran to the gas station, and threw some trash away on my way in. On my way out, I realized my keys were missing. Thinking I threw them away, and fearing that I'd be late returning to work, I tore through the disgusting trash only to find my keys on the seat of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 219

You deserved it 11 284

Karma karma karma karma chameleon, you come and go.

By Karma - 15/03/2017 02:00

Today, I forgot my phone in a restaurant bathroom because I was too distracted trying to steal three rolls of toilet paper without anyone noticing. After sinking that low because I was too broke to buy my own toilet roll, I'm now also in the market for a new phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 678

You deserved it 7 216

By idgit42 - 27/07/2010 22:15 - United States

Today, I didn't realize until I was home that I'd thrown my retainer away with my tray at Chick-fil-A. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 743

You deserved it 30 352

By Typrokka - 22/10/2009 17:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to drop the garbage in the compactor as I left to do some shopping. I quickly put my handbag down on the side, threw the 'garbage' in the machine, watched it do its thing, and then turned round to find... the bag of garbage on the side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 161

You deserved it 32 201

saranottelling 7

Saturday 16 January 2010 1:53

The same thing happened to me when I was 10, only with my retainer. The sticky garbage didn't ever really come off and I had to get a new one.

GAYbrial 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 14:53

That's only half a word.

Comments

Newbie21 1

Saturday 16 January 2010 2:54

Just clean it with disinfectent

capthavoc123 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 3:09

Phones go in pockets, dummy. Phones are not a food.

PayneTrain585 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 3:16

why does everybody on teh interwebz spell "realize" wrong

CheshireHalli 19

Saturday 16 January 2010 4:32

Other countries spell it different. So, not wrong. =)

dudeitsdanny 9

Saturday 16 January 2010 6:36

It is wrong if you spell it "realyse" =) Just saying ;D

baby_gurl2405 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 3:49

one word: Brill

GAYbrial 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 14:53

That's only half a word.

ihateu44 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 3:49

well you will have to buy a phone of burger king LOL

ihateu44 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 3:49

well you will have to buy a phone of burger king LOL

Mest_Is_Wicked 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 3:50

WHERE IS THE FIRST POST!?!?

maggie4realz 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 4:22

Not gonna lie, I've done this before.

cpcat123 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 4:35

Thousands of people in Haiti would kill to have a cell phone, quit whining about trivial things. I'm a little sickened this made it on the site

Towelie_31 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 5:42

lol this is a good point, how come no one in haiti ever posts on fml? (sarcasm)

JeNGaL9 0

Saturday 16 January 2010 4:38

Spelling corrections??? Teh?? Seriously...fyl

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The Top

Today, my wife upset herself by ringing my best friend to see if he would lie about where I was, and he did. Now my wife thinks I get my friends to lie for me to cover up my cheating. I’ve never once cheated. This feels like the next level up from cheating on her in her dreams, because she's crazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 456

You deserved it 137

Today, I spent hours cooking an amazing dinner for my family, who had just gotten home from a trip, so we could spend some time together because I'd started to miss everyone. When they got home, they saw it all laid out and just took plates to their room, without even telling me they were home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 273

You deserved it 2 515

The Top

Today, my girlfriend looked me straight in the eye and said, "I know about the sea turtles." I asked her what she was talking about and she said, "Next time, shut up or I'll show you pain." I have no idea what she's talking about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 660

You deserved it 2 343

Today, I volunteered to be my brother's designated driver. I told him throughout the night that I wasn't drinking, but he ended up leaving me at the bar and going to his friend's house in a cab for more drinks, taking my keys along with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 759

You deserved it 4 069

Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 536

You deserved it 5 778

Today, I was at a professional hockey game. I wasn't paying attention and a puck was shot into the stands and hit me in the face. My mouth was bleeding and I lost two teeth. As I was trying to cough up my teeth the old man next to me shoved me over and stole the puck. Everyone cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 192

You deserved it 5 579

Today, I returned to my teaching job at a local community college after surfing for the weekend. I'd got sunburned, one student immediately noticed and said to me, "Morning, Mr. Pinky!" Now they all do it. My students are assholes. I hate teaching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 473

You deserved it 8 381

Today, I was kicked out of college for not attending a class I wasn't ever enrolled in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 288

You deserved it 125

Same thing different taste

Storage wars

Smooth

Sticky situation

Karma karma karma karma chameleon, you come and go.

Top comments

Comments