Love: Today, I went out to eat with my girlfriend. The waiter came...

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By mynameisarmpit - 15/11/2010 06:48

Today, I went out to eat with my girlfriend. The waiter came up and was being nice. He said, "What can I get you two gentlemen?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 734

You deserved it 4 673

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 29/09/2009 19:09 - United States

Today, I was at lunch with my girlfriend. The waitress came up and asked for her number, then asked if she had a significant other. I laughed as my girlfriend gave the waitress her number. They're going on a date, tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 838

You deserved it 7 161

By TheMike23 - 11/01/2016 05:28 - United States - Winter Garden

Today, I went out with my mom to a restaurant. We were sitting down to eat, and a waitress walks over to our table and asks, "How are you ladies doing tonight?" It really was a nice thing to ask, for my mom. As for me, being a man, not so much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 913

You deserved it 2 297

Pleased to meet you

By footinmouth - 13/09/2009 05:14 - United States

Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 015

You deserved it 14 110

By Anonymous - 24/09/2013 07:15 - United States - Petrolia

Today, I took my girlfriend out to eat at a diner where my friend works. My friend was our waiter but too busy to talk much. He texted me after we'd left to tell me that my girlfriend had slipped him her number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 012

You deserved it 3 420

By Anonymous - 13/03/2013 23:22 - United States

Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 408

You deserved it 4 325

By serverdessert - 08/03/2009 21:02 - United States

Today, at the restaurant where I work, I served a table of 4 middle-age women. Before greeting the table, I was deciding between saying "Can I get you anything to drink?" and "Can I start you off with something?" My actual greeting? "Can I get you ladies off?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 567

You deserved it 19 298

Smooth talker

By Kate - 07/03/2009 18:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were out to eat. The waiter came and asked what we wanted. My boyfriend said he wanted a cheeseburger and I told the waiter I'd have the same. My boyfriend looked at me and said, "Are you sure you don't want a salad?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 784

You deserved it 8 268

By Anonymous - 13/03/2019 12:00 - United States - Salem

Today, I asked a table at a restaurant if there's anything I could get out of their way and they replied, "Yeah, you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 245

You deserved it 243

By Anonymous - 20/07/2009 00:22 - United States

Today, I went out to eat at a restaurant. When the waitress saw me, she continously told me how beautiful and kind I was. Flattered, I just said thank you. Five minutes later, one of the ugliest girls I've ever seen in my life walked in. The waitress told her the same exact things she told me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 630

You deserved it 13 583

By Anonymous - 18/04/2009 06:53 - United States

Today, I went out to dinner. The waiter was pretty cute. He greets us, "Hi my name is... (long pause) Jordan." Thinking he was flirting, I quickly smart back, "Are you confused?" He says, "No actually, I have a stutter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 904

You deserved it 69 793

ke59100 1

Monday 15 November 2010 12:06

could be worse, he could have what can I get you two ladies?

maskedman 9

Monday 15 November 2010 12:17

At least if your girlfriend cries she can soak the tears up with her mustache.

Comments

vbmg152 18

Monday 15 November 2010 12:20

WTF???

BenD0VER 0

Monday 15 November 2010 12:25

Good one!

FeVerTaKeR7 0

Monday 15 November 2010 12:27

dude pick more wisely!

hairt 4

Monday 15 November 2010 12:36

well armpit, give her a makeover. you'll love the outcome ;)

allmidnighteyes 10

Monday 15 November 2010 12:36

As long as you think she's attractive, why should some random person's view of her affect your relationship in any way?

locachick101 0

Monday 15 November 2010 12:36

well maybe she should shave before going out... just sayin

Judus_beej 0

Monday 15 November 2010 12:36

tell her to start wearing makeup. some people need it.

Kraggle 0

Monday 15 November 2010 12:40

hahaha:/ sorry!

habeeboburky94 0

Monday 15 November 2010 12:40

More of an FHL, than an FML. Poor girl :(

mintcar 9

Monday 15 November 2010 12:41

Your girlfriend was mistaken for a man. She should be the one doing the complaining.

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The Top

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You deserved it 4 145

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I agree, your life sucks 2 379

You deserved it 236

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I agree, your life sucks 43 999

You deserved it 8 377

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I agree, your life sucks 22 140

You deserved it 2 143

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I agree, your life sucks 27 385

You deserved it 2 751

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I agree, your life sucks 20 867

You deserved it 1 673

Same thing different taste

Pleased to meet you

Smooth talker

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