Love: Today, I went to a dance with the boy I like. To my delight,... - FML

By michellemoyah - 25/02/2012 05:04 - United States

Today, I went to a dance with the boy I like. To my delight, he tried to pick me up. To my dismay, he couldn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 366

You deserved it 6 907

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Same thing different taste

The Lady in Red

By Anonymous - 08/06/2009 01:36 - United States

Today, I was at a party. The music changed to a slow dance. Everybody grabbed a partner and I was left on the dancefloor alone. Suddenly, this guy walked up to me. I swore that he was going to ask me to dance. He then said, "Could you hold me my drink?" and went to dance with another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 202

You deserved it 3 918

By Anonymous - 08/01/2014 00:39 - United States - Salem

Today, a guy I like asked me to a dance. Trying to act modest and at the same time compliment him, I told him, "You could do so much better, though." After thinking for a moment, he replied, "You're right, I could. Never mind," and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 419

You deserved it 60 994

By Anonymous - 04/10/2009 04:06 - United States

Today, I went to my Homecoming dance. I had a great time until some fat girl kept trying to dance with my date, even though he politely asked her to stop. I decided to intervene. I found myself pinned to the floor by a fat girl crushing on my date, who was cheering her on as she tackled me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 725

You deserved it 8 795

By kylie - 15/11/2010 21:17 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were in my backyard goofing around when he tried to pick me up. He couldn't. I jokingly tried to lift him. I did so without much effort. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 485

You deserved it 7 210

By Anonymous - 21/04/2009 21:52 - United States

Today, I was at my senior dance dancing with this guy I really like. He was telling me how he likes a strong woman who's not afraid to make the first move. Empowered by what he said, I asked him out. He said no because he thinks girls shouldn't ask guys out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 063

You deserved it 5 094

Rave on

By poorclubgoer - 14/11/2009 10:11 - United States

Today, I decided to go to a club with my friends. I was flattered when an attractive guy started dancing with me. Later, I went to grab my money to pay for my dinner and realized while dancing, the very sneaky man pulled my forty dollars out of my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 701

You deserved it 5 944

By IcantDance! - 01/10/2012 16:05 - United States - Daphne

Today, although I can't dance, I decided to go to a club. A really cute girl asked me to dance, and I politely declined. She kept insisting, so I finally said okay. A few minutes in, she stopped, looked at me, and said, "If you're going to make fun of my dancing, I'm leaving." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 348

You deserved it 2 731

Mixed signals, mixed results

By Anonymous - 07/09/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom - Doncaster

Today, the guy I'm in love with invited me out to a gig with him and his friends, only to then try to set me up with his friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 117

By Anonymous - 24/07/2013 16:05 - Canada - Neustadt

Today, I went to a dance and saw a really cute guy. Glow sticks were everywhere, so trying to be cute, I took a broken one and dripped some of the glowing liquid on my chest. It made him notice me, but only for him to point out that I'd managed to cut myself and was bleeding badly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 939

You deserved it 52 008

By clumsy - 07/05/2013 00:45 - United States - Murfreesboro

Today, I tried to "trip" and fall into this guy I've had a crush on. I missed and fell on my face. He stepped over me and kept walking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 847

You deserved it 54 009

Next

Top comments

ambowew 7

Saturday 25 February 2012 11:50

I like 'em round, I like 'em chunky.

jerseyboy732 16

Saturday 25 February 2012 11:57

someone didn't eat his wheaties

Comments

jabs98 1

Sunday 26 February 2012 5:23

R u overweight?!

kei1108 13

Sunday 26 February 2012 7:20

Who cares?! You went on a otherwise fun date!! (hopefully!) ;)

acetheone 8

Sunday 26 February 2012 9:02

one or both of you needs to start going to the gym.

br0ccoli 14

Sunday 26 February 2012 9:36

Oh those skinny boys in tight girl jeans don't have enough testosterone to grow muscles in order to pick you up, sweetie. Their balls are too tightly bound by restrictive jeans, self apathy and teen angst.

IDKWhatHappened 0

Sunday 26 February 2012 11:01

Nq

whynotbliss 18

Sunday 26 February 2012 18:38

Time to, a. Lose weight! Or b. Get a man, one that can lift you!

HunterAlpha1 8

Sunday 26 February 2012 19:22

well at least give him an E for Effort.

ss_20_xx 14

Sunday 26 February 2012 21:37

Eat healthy, live healthy!

phycoM1213 0

Monday 27 February 2012 18:27

Well don't be fat then simple

Foxtails 6

Monday 27 February 2012 22:50

Has anyone else considered that maybe, it's him who's out of shape?

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for "cheating" on him with his best friend. What did I do? I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek when I finally met him in person, after years of hearing about how great he is and how much we would get along. FML

I agree, your life sucks 438

You deserved it 158

Today, after being in love with one of my best friends for ages, he took me on a date. We then went back to his place and we made love. Afterwards, he told me he wanted to show me something and led me outside. He ran back in and locked the door. It's a two hour walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 226

You deserved it 7 532

The Top

Today, a weird friend of my father's decided to visit us. Our house isn't very big, so when he went to the bathroom, I could hear everything. He didn't wash his hands after a massive dump, and when he came out of the bathroom he patted my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 574

You deserved it 2 499

Today, I discovered the real reason my husband was distraught last week and has been acting moodily ever since. An attractive girl he was secretly having sex chats with online confessed to him that "she" was actually a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 863

You deserved it 4 575

Today, I realized that the dog humping my leg was the most action I've gotten in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 092

You deserved it 8 216

Today, my mum decided that having the flu and being too lazy to go upstairs to the bathroom is a valid excuse to shit in a jug instead. 5ML

I agree, your life sucks 44 990

You deserved it 3 606

Today, my step-dad tried to talk me into getting plastic surgery. His reasoning: "Let's face it, 28 and single? Look, I know your mum gave you shitty genes, but that's no excuse to avoid fixing your face, honey." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 587

You deserved it 3 513

Today, I attended the wrong funeral. I spent twenty minutes trying to hide and walk away without being too conspicuous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 335

You deserved it 8 644