Work: Today, I went to take a dump at work. The silence in the room...

By not telling you my name - 07/08/2015 15:16 - United States - Elkhart

Today, I went to take a dump at work. The silence in the room was deafening, and I ended up singing to myself. After I proudly finished, there was a short silence, followed by a coworker in the next stall saying, "Um... don't quit the day job, Rick." I'll never live this down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 638

You deserved it 5 814

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Same thing different taste

By NoPrivacy - 26/04/2012 10:44 - United States

Today, my boss overheard me singing, "I need a shit, I need a shit" on my way to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 175

You deserved it 34 737

By bathroomgirl - 11/08/2011 16:09 - United States

Today, thinking I was alone in a public bathroom, I started singing the words to my favorite song. A minute later that I heard a toilet flush, so I just sat there petrified. The other person sarcastically picked up the singing from where I left off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 074

You deserved it 37 197

Pissed

By Anonymous - 19/11/2023 03:00 - Cayman Islands - George Town

Today, at work, I had to use the bathroom to urinate. It's basically in an open plan office, so everyone can hear absolutely everything. After successfully and discreetly doing my business, I noticed a bit of dirt on the wall. I gave it a rub with my thumb on the smooth tile. It sounded exactly like a loud fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 259

You deserved it 353

Take a break

By Anonymous - 04/05/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, I really had to take a shit. My coworker had gone on lunch break and I was alone in the shop. There were no customers, so to the can I went. Cue a long series of loud wet farts and splashes, followed by the flush. I emerged to see the horrified face of some old lady and her grandson who'd heard everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 453

You deserved it 114

Alone

By shit - 30/05/2019 06:00

Today, I was in a public restroom trying to take a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself, "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard, "No you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud. And that I wasn't alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 785

You deserved it 726

Not now, mate

By yuen - 16/06/2009 14:59 - Australia

Today, I went to take a shit and found my boss shaving in the toilet. While in the cubicle, he asked me about my work and the conversation lasted 15 minutes. I stayed in there even though I'd finished shitting after 5 minutes, during which 3 people heard my progress report while shitting next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 614

You deserved it 4 741

Office world is hell

By Anonymous - 11/07/2020 14:01

Today, at work I was sitting on the toilet and a coworker came in and yelled, “That sounded like a big one!” and wouldn't leave until I left came out of the stall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 479

You deserved it 141

By Anonymous - 26/09/2011 18:52 - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 067

You deserved it 3 580

By Anonymous - 12/01/2014 00:26 - United States - Goodyear

Today, I used the restroom at a mall. I thought I was alone, so I started singing. When I got out of the stall, there were men staring at me. Not only did I embarrass myself with my own singing, I'd accidentally used the men's restroom too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 785

You deserved it 23 763

Am I a ghost to you?

By AJ. - 19/08/2021 14:01

Today, at work, I thought I’d sneak a wee fart out, but ended up shitting myself. I just left work without telling anyone, went home, showered, then went back to work. No one missed me being away for 2 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 888

You deserved it 349

Murilirum 23

Saturday 8 August 2015 8:07

I think he's to blame considering he didn't help by humming or pickup up some of the backup singing. One person can only do so much... :-/

admeid 10

Saturday 8 August 2015 8:04

At least you didn't have musical sharts instead...

Comments

imshadyxo 25

Saturday 8 August 2015 11:11

If you proudly finished, why won't you live it down? Have no remorse, OP!

Dexter83_fml 17

Saturday 8 August 2015 11:39

Rick I think you have invented a brand new type of music- poop music not to be confused with pop music.

cheshireau 26

Saturday 8 August 2015 13:23

This is why, if I can't hold it, I use the disability toilet.

ArcheryArtist 20

Saturday 8 August 2015 15:26

Oh man I would die of embarrassment. I would probably think about quitting my job too XD I feel for you though, as I've been caught singing in the shower many times. And also at school...heheh

Lalala579121 27

Saturday 8 August 2015 16:29

You should have yelled "my name's not Rick!".

neuronerd 28

Saturday 8 August 2015 17:06

I don't understand this need some humans have to sing while excreting waste. When I taught preschool aged kids, most of them would sing when you took them to the bathroom. Apparently, this behavior persists into adulthood. That's so weird.