Miscellaneous: Today, I witnessed my dad spreading his ass cheeks to show my...

By smf_ds - 31/07/2015 20:48 - Portugal - Rebordosa

Today, I witnessed my dad spreading his ass cheeks to show my mom the rashes his hemorrhoids are giving him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 074

You deserved it 2 225

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Same thing different taste

By imblue42 - 24/06/2015 05:16 - United States

Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 246

You deserved it 3 701

By not as scarred as he should be - 18/10/2012 18:19 - Canada - Cambridge

Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 766

You deserved it 3 342

By Anonymous - 19/02/2010 00:44 - United States

Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 067

You deserved it 2 805

By maruskasommers - 09/01/2012 09:39 - Czech Republic

Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 309

You deserved it 2 711

By Anonymous - 23/09/2018 17:30

Today, my dad's new medicine for his bad intestines makes him fart so hard I can feel the vibrations through the floorboards. The whole house smells like an open sewer and he thinks it's funny. He now has to change his undies several times a day from repeatedly shitting himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 032

You deserved it 194

By RectalSteve - 10/09/2017 20:00 - United Kingdom - Belfast

Today, I showed my girlfriend some old home videos of me as a kid. My dad must have taped over one though, because halfway through it cut to extremely graphic footage of his colonoscopy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 564

You deserved it 286

By Anonymous - 02/03/2016 05:06 - United States - Miami

Today, at work, man who was buying medicine for his son came up to me for help. He didn't know how to explain it to me, so instead he showed me a picture of a rash on his kid's butthole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 777

You deserved it 1 686

Digging it

By blech - 08/12/2014 23:08 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I witnessed my dad rummage through his nostrils, thoughtfully examine the contents, and flick them nonchalantly onto the carpet. All of this he did with the biggest demented grin on his face. Sadly, this has become a regular occurrence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 766

You deserved it 2 560

Mortifying

By whatashame - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my dad was on the couch and I sat down next to him. As I was reading a text message, I saw my dad's fat stomach sticking out so I patted it. After the first two pats, I realized I was patting in the wrong place. I patted the family jewels. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 557

You deserved it 80 740

By Anonymous - 13/03/2016 04:31 - United States - Havertown

Today, my dad had fun embarrassing me as much as possible in my parent-teacher conference by moaning whenever the teacher talked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 494

You deserved it 1 513

NotGabe 28

Saturday 1 August 2015 8:28

That's true love.

5secondsofvvifi 21

Saturday 1 August 2015 8:30

Pass the brain bleach.

Comments

Krwman 8

Saturday 1 August 2015 21:23

I've been to Portugal. I know the dwellings have doors. Most people know how to use them. Try it. Unless you were invited in. Then the situation is too strange. Even for Portugal.

rhianna060 8

Saturday 1 August 2015 21:49

I'd like to donate a dollar to your therapy fund.

Llamasaur 14

Saturday 1 August 2015 22:47

Relationship goals.

devinaww 15

Sunday 2 August 2015 3:27

what's the point at looking at it? wouldn't letting a doctor see it be more useful?

JdB22 7

Sunday 2 August 2015 4:42

Considering the many other things that could have been happening in that scenario, I'd count myself lucky that it was only your dad showing a rash.

LosinIt2008 14

Sunday 2 August 2015 9:17

lol

MandieL 27

Sunday 2 August 2015 9:20

Maybe the dr has already seen it, and they are just keeping an eye on it to see if the treatment is making it better. Since he can't see it, he asked his wife, rather than making extra trips to the dr.