Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my... - FML

By ugh - 14/06/2011 17:56 - United States

Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 698

You deserved it 3 927

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By jackpot - 09/05/2011 01:53 - Venezuela

Today, I was in a parking lot looking for a spot, and after driving around for a long while I finally found one. A homeless man was taking a shit on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 456

You deserved it 3 020

By pauper - 09/02/2012 01:20

Today, I came home to a homeless man sleeping in my living room. It turns out he thought my house was abandoned due to its disheveled appearance, and decided to break in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 281

You deserved it 8 774

By Ally - 19/05/2011 01:07 - United States

Today, I came home to my front door open and a homeless man taking a 'bath' in my sink. If this wasn't bad enough, he refused to leave because 'finders keepers!' FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 116

You deserved it 4 060

By Anonymous - 22/09/2015 05:09 - United States - Boston

Today, I tried to be nice and let a homeless man have a place to crash for the night. He repaid me by pissing all over my new couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 644

You deserved it 23 397

There goes the neighborhood…

By Anonymous - 21/10/2021 11:00

Today, my drunk neighbor couldn’t get into his apartment and thought it would be a good idea to poop in our yard. He left a pile of diarrhea under our window, and poop-stained napkins all over the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 020

You deserved it 66

By Brook363 - 27/05/2009 15:39 - United States

Today, I witnessed the homeless man that visits my neighborhood placing bags containing his own poop in my trash cans. I later received a notice stating that the garbage company will not provide my residence with garbage service until I “refrain from placing bags of my own feces in the trash.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 794

You deserved it 3 110

By jl_word - 04/02/2015 21:49 - United States

Today, I paid a local homeless man to rake the leaves in my yard. After paying and driving him to the bus stop, I found his shit on my back porch. I need new shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 652

You deserved it 3 844

By wellokaythen - 14/05/2013 19:52 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I heard noises outside my front door. I looked out through the window, only to see my boyfriend encouraging his dog to take a dump on my welcome mat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 932

You deserved it 5 119

You OK dude?

By Anonymous - 28/03/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I walked out to the parking lot and caught a homeless man laying a fat steamer on the hood of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 71

By minimum wage - 02/04/2012 08:38 - Canada

Today, I walked in on a homeless guy peeing on a turd on the floor of the women's restroom at the park. I'm a janitor for the city. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 341

You deserved it 2 405

Next

Top comments

garrettcodd 0

Tuesday 14 June 2011 23:07

the worst part is you can't go shit on his porch...

kingnate16 0

Tuesday 14 June 2011 23:02

did u join him?

Comments

WOGBRO 6

Wednesday 15 June 2011 8:01

Do you mean porch or Porsche.

Bunny_Wabbit 1

Wednesday 15 June 2011 8:01

Lmao of course it was relentless. Did you expect him to just pinch it off mid-dump?

CallMeHush 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 8:06

I love hobos, they do ALL the cool stuff!

SteveMagnifico 6

Wednesday 15 June 2011 8:10

I wud have pushed him over into his shit

iloveyoungmoney 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 8:55

u should have thrown mustard on him:)

some1azn 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 8:55

Kevin Harlan voice - "NO REGARD FOR HUMAN LIFE!!!"

liy223 6

Wednesday 15 June 2011 8:59

these 'homeless people' ones just keep getting more and more bizarre...

SGT_DBL 15

Wednesday 15 June 2011 10:37

I know! I love it! BRING ON MORE ZANY HOMELESS FMLS!

bwinski 19

Wednesday 15 June 2011 9:01

classic

jaramia20 5

Wednesday 15 June 2011 9:48

I had that happen to me once . Here is what you do . Go around back and get out the garden hose . Turn it on and walk around front and hose that sucker down . This will accomplish 3 things . 1 it's VERY VERY funny to see the look on they're face . 2 it washes the smelly bum off . 3 it washes The crap off your porch . The old man that was doing it to me never came back after this.

abbeyalix 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 10:43

Eww,do you give him some paper?

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Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Annoying Am I overreacting? Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

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Here's another FML video from our friends at 10secondtraumas.com. Enjoy! Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tre...

I agree, your life sucks 41

You deserved it 39

Today, thanks to that stupid ass blue dog, our kids haven’t stopped hounding me about when their dad and I are getting married. They’re too young to understand, so I try to gently change the subject. That worked for about 5 minutes before they were right back to asking. Holy uncomfortable subject Batman! FML

I agree, your life sucks 243

You deserved it 727

The Top

Today, I somehow managed to slice open my thumb. The dangerous weapon that caused this to happen? Velcro. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 415

You deserved it 199

Today, my girlfriend of one year broke up with me because I started having PTSD induced night terrors. On my birthday as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 065

You deserved it 92

Today, I was on a flight coming back home. On my right was a fat monk who was snoring very loudly, and on my left there were two old women who were talking about their teenage love lives in detail. The flight was 17 hours long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 756

You deserved it 3 023

Today, my boss forced me to come into work despite having a bad cold. While waiting a table, I violently sneezed and sprayed a child's face with snot. His dad got so pissed that my boss had to pretend to fire me just to calm him down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 724

You deserved it 2 652

Today, my washing machine, dryer, vacuum cleaner, and laptop all stopped working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 352

You deserved it 166

I don't get no respect!

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 88