Love: Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents...

By breeeeeh - 21/06/2013 22:18 - France - Brou-sur-chantereine

Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 681

You deserved it 69 958

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Not a morning person

By Anonymous - 15/07/2021 20:01 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 531

You deserved it 750

Sneaky

By TasedAndDazed - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 619

You deserved it 43 663

By Jacqueline - 01/07/2012 20:01 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to throw pebbles at my bedroom window in the middle of the night. It triggered the burglar alarm, which woke up everyone in the house. If my parents didn't know I had a boyfriend before, they certainly do now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 230

You deserved it 4 793

By ohfantastic - 25/01/2009 02:47 - United States

Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 696

You deserved it 2 378

By Moeswifey - 24/10/2010 17:11 - United States

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend making breakfast. I thought he was making it for me, so I sat at the table. When he walked over with his plate, he said, "Oh, I didn't know you were here!" I'd slept in the same bed with him last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 436

You deserved it 4 559

By Anonymous - 27/06/2011 23:45 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend tried to climb up to my third story window in the early hours of the morning. Just before he got to the top, he slipped and fell to the ground. My dad had to drive him to the hospital at 3am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 897

You deserved it 7 717

By Anonymous - 01/08/2019 06:00

Today, my boyfriend sneaked into my room, not knowing I wasn't home. It would have been great, except my dad went in my room to put laundry away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 253

You deserved it 433

By avocadotoe - 14/11/2016 06:52 - United States - Big Bear Lake

Today, my boyfriend and I were house sitting. We were a little on edge because we'd heard noises. We were starting to get intimate, and suddenly the house alarm started going off. We locked ourselves in the room, called the police, and they told us that we were the ones who'd set it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 203

You deserved it 3 113

Psychopath's joke

By hannieannie - 20/11/2019 01:00

Today, I’m still recovering from last night. I fell asleep before my boyfriend. He thought it would be funny to stand at the bottom of the bed with a knife and wake me up. I screamed so much that I wet myself and had a panic attack. He recorded the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 039

You deserved it 258

Where am I?

By Anonymous - 13/10/2008 08:25

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend, but it wasn’t actually her. What happened last night? FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 994

You deserved it 108 950

Kashaqueetrah 12

Saturday 22 June 2013 5:24

Why didn't you notice it was your boyfriend though?

BntyHntrSeattle 30

Saturday 22 June 2013 5:27

BUT MOM, IF I FORGOT HE WAS HERE THEN HE WASN'T HERE.

Comments

ABillOnFire 15

Saturday 22 June 2013 6:01

I understand, when I wake up it takes me like 2 minutes to actually wake up once I've gotten out of bed, if anyone speaks to me in those two minutes I just talk jibberish and have no idea what's going on

KevinFlynn 13

Saturday 22 June 2013 6:02

epic fail

DocBastard 38

Saturday 22 June 2013 6:03

And this is EXACTLY why my daughter's windows are connected to our alarm system. No really, they actually are. And this is actually why.

Lost_Ghost 8

Saturday 22 June 2013 7:36

I would do the exact same thing if I had kids, Doc! Good Man!

perdix 29

Saturday 22 June 2013 6:18

A stranger is your "boyfriend?" You could have relaxed if you had duct-taped him securely enough.

Lost_Ghost 8

Saturday 22 June 2013 10:01

Rope is better IMO! :)

rety1 13

Saturday 22 June 2013 6:28

Wow if you're that stupid then for the sake of humanity, dump that guy and go join a convent.

Ellamore 13

Saturday 22 June 2013 6:33

You Deserved It, OP. Next time try not to scream! :-)

NavalAvaiations1 5

Saturday 22 June 2013 6:47

OP, if I had a daughter scream in the middle of the night then I saw a man in her bed... I'd shoot him! you are lucky you didn't get him killed.

ladybuglet 22

Saturday 22 June 2013 6:57

How inconsiderate. You are living with your parents and you sneak your boyfriend in. It isn't your house. If you want a guest for the night, you should be asking your parents first.