Intimacy: Today, I woke up to a text from my mother-in-law saying, "Happy...

By Anonymous - 17/04/2012 19:29 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, I woke up to a text from my mother-in-law saying, "Happy birthday! I hope you have great birthday sex!" I'm now afraid to go over there for dinner tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 894

You deserved it 3 175

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 05/08/2013 05:33 - United States - Romulus

Today, I found out that the messages about the issues in my sex life that I'd been sending to my best friend had been sent to my mother via iMessage. She's coming over for dinner tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 044

You deserved it 9 021

Booming economy!

By ThatGuy24 - 26/09/2019 22:00

Today, it's my birthday and it would be a great day if me and my wife weren’t literally too poor to celebrate it. To make it even better, she won’t have birthday sex with me, because we live with her mom and she’s afraid of her hearing us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 926

You deserved it 409

By ShitHappens2016 - 16/04/2017 18:00

Today, my mother-in-law texted to wish me a happy birthday. She spelled my name wrong and it's not my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 867

You deserved it 329

Thanks mom

By Anonymous - 14/02/2021 14:01 - Colombia

Today, my mom decided it was a good idea to remind me about my non-existent sex life while all the family was having dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 034

You deserved it 107

By thissucks - 21/02/2011 22:20 - United States

Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 572

You deserved it 3 419

Happy nothing, then

By amy - 30/06/2018 19:00

Today, it's my birthday. I went downstairs expecting birthday greetings from my parents. Instead, they just sat on the couch saying nothing. Thinking they forgot, I casually reminded them. My mom scoffed and said, "Go do the dishes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 633

You deserved it 364

Oh no…

By Anonymous - 12/04/2014 01:40 - Canada

Today, it was my birthday. I only got one message, from my dad, which was a sexual image meant for my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 984

You deserved it 3 451

Cool story, tell it again

By GGimabeast - 29/07/2010 04:14 - United States

Today, I celebrated my birthday. My mom invited a bunch of my relatives over, and they started telling funny stories of when I was a kid. My mom decided that then was an appropriate time to talk about how she caught me looking at porn the other night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 443

You deserved it 12 428

By Anonymous - 21/07/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, I missed a call from my mom. It's my birthday, and glad she remembered, I called back to thank her. She was surprised when I brought up going out for dinner, and asked me what the occasion was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 701

You deserved it 2 776

Issues

By Badkitty14 - 09/08/2012 20:16 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend asked me what he should get his mother for her birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 677

You deserved it 3 720

thisiscat 14

Wednesday 18 April 2012 0:16

Maybe that's the point..

FirstTigerHobbes 13

Wednesday 18 April 2012 0:48

I would but I'm crying

Comments

accountforme 1

Thursday 19 April 2012 4:19

Is the sex from your wife or your mother-in-law?

coolkod1005 2

Thursday 19 April 2012 6:09

Don't be a ******* pussy how the **** is that akward really suck my dick mother ****** honestly

JasonEP 3

Friday 20 April 2012 8:41

At least she has a since of humor. And you are married to her kid. Do you really think you got married and don't have sex. Grow up and take a joke.

JasonEP 3

Friday 20 April 2012 8:44

Im going to rephrase what I said earlier. It's a joke not a dick. So don't take it so hard.

bronxkam 4

Sunday 22 April 2012 5:39

At least it wasn't accompanied by a pic of her.

Kingbreezy04 10

Friday 26 October 2012 17:32

Hell yeah, you better go and get some of that mother in law ass.

wellnowwhat 6

Sunday 30 June 2013 7:43

OP, your MIL sounds awesome!! XD So maybe it's an awkward well-wishing, but at at least she didn't say "Well, it's the anniversary of the day my son threw his life away". I've been there, it ain't pleasant. Congrats on landing a kickass mother-in-law!!