Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up to an unfamiliar male face right beside mine....

By Anonymous - 27/12/2009 03:09 - Canada

Today, I woke up to an unfamiliar male face right beside mine. I flipped out fell of my 4 foot raised bed and got a concussion. Who, you may ask, was in my bed? My Robert Pattinson pillowcase. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 518

You deserved it 71 425

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 20/10/2016 13:17 - United Kingdom - Maidstone

Today, I woke up to find my face covered in scratches, some of them bleeding. I was rather puzzled, as I don't have a cat. Then I realised that the feathers in my pillow had stuck out and scratched my face. I was attacked by my own pillow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 348

You deserved it 1 144

By imawesomeokay - 20/07/2013 05:53 - Mexico - Zapopan

Today, I went to watch a movie. In the middle of it, I accidentally fell asleep. Minutes later, I awoke on a stranger's shoulder. He was caressing my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 243

You deserved it 10 962

Panic!

By sweetdreams - 18/09/2016 06:39 - United States - New York

Today, I woke up suddenly with giant bugs biting my legs. I screamed, ripped the blanket off the bed and bolted to the bathroom to recover. Turns out it was all a dream, and the person who needed to recover most was my shell-shocked boyfriend who had been sleeping soundly beside me. Sorry, babe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 780

You deserved it 1 408

By breeeeeh - 21/06/2013 22:18 - France - Brou-sur-chantereine

Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 681

You deserved it 69 955

By girlymae - 27/02/2013 07:59 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I was in bed when I rolled over and saw a hand right beside my head. I freaked out and nearly peed myself, just to realize that it was the huggable heart pillow my boyfriend had given to me on Valentine's Day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 460

You deserved it 24 030

By Anonymous - 24/08/2016 14:26

Today, I woke up to my husband's face. That'd be nice if he hadn't turned his eyelids inside out, waiting to scare me. I was scared alright. So scared that I pissed myself and broke my side table falling out of bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 288

You deserved it 1 462

By Secretlypossessed - 29/10/2018 03:00

Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 974

You deserved it 293

By SoVeryMonday - 30/11/2009 18:01 - Canada

Today, we rearranged the bedroom and my boyfriend and I switched sides of the bed. When the alarm went off, he got confused as to which side the clock was on. Instead of hitting the snooze button like he normally does, he hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 158

You deserved it 9 525

Didn't see ya there

By AylaMarie92 - 09/11/2021 13:59

Today, like every other day, I suffer from insomnia. On returning to the bedroom after a very late night shower to hopefully get some rest, I sat on my cat. I jumped up quickly and smacked my face against the cupboard. I then looked back to see if she was OK. I'd sat on my Squishmallow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 928

You deserved it 337

By Anonymous - 03/01/2010 16:35 - United States

Today, I was lying in bed, staring at the ceiling with the lights off. It was 1AM, and I'd just finished watching a scary movie, so I was a little paranoid. I was about to fall asleep, when an eerie light lit the room. I jumped, got tangled in the sheets, and hit my head against the bed frame. Where'd the light come from? Not a space ship. Not someone breaking in. It was my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 561

You deserved it 29 184

caancoha 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 9:06

Oh, look. He's watching you sleep.

IMB916 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 9:16

YDI for having such bad taste in men.

Comments

thatsoviciouS 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 15:10

I don't get why people are saying YDI just because they hate twilight, I mean really grow up!

infantry831 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 15:33

punch yourself

dspadres 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 15:54

YDI for having the pillow next to your face. I keep mine between my legs where it belongs.

MissSaraMarshall 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 15:58

for the love of god, he;s the same ******* actor. He isn't two different people in different movies. Get a ******* life. If she thinks Pattinson looks hot, who the **** are you to tell her she deserves to get a concussion?

Dont_Explain 3

Sunday 27 December 2009 16:06

He's as ugly as **** in both, its about the character he portrays. If she likes him due to twilight, she should be put in a coma. "OMG RPAT IS SO HOT" and yet unnoticed before twilight.

MissSaraMarshall 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 16:07

you do realize that's the equivalent of saying "Oh well in the black shirt you can like him, but not in the Red shirt. He's creepy in red" Are you having problems separating reality and the media? oh and just so you know, Robert Pattinson doesn't act like either one of them,

Stoody_fml 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 16:26

you deserve it cause you have a ******* pillow case with that fags face on it

fuzz97 23

Sunday 27 December 2009 16:31

Hahaha, you suck at life!

jamjenni2774 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 16:48

WEIRD!! JUST WEIRD!!

iHatemylife987 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 17:11

What the **** is up with these people? I did the same thing last week but with my cat and i brought the Robert Pattinson pillowcase with me because i was snuggling it. Yes, i ******* love Robert Pattinson get over it. How bout me and her and hell, i'll bring my cousin who likes him too go back into you're childhood or teenage years and said you deserved to go into a COMA because you liked say err, Farrah Fawcette or Michael Jackson (RIP Both of them) See if you like it.