Money: Today, I woke up to my boyfriend jumping on my bed exclaiming...

By Ecce - 10/07/2010 12:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend jumping on my bed exclaiming that he had "won the lottery." He broke the bed. Turns out he only won £15.80. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 561

You deserved it 3 211

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 17/05/2011 17:34 - United States

Today, I won the lottery. My ex-girlfriend has the ticket. I just broke up with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 811

You deserved it 28 403

By Anonymous - 11/10/2010 09:07 - Canada

Today, I scratched a lottery ticket I had gotten for my birthday and won $10,000. In celebration, I jumped up and raised my hands directly into a ceiling fan. Oh, and it was a fake ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 385

You deserved it 6 088

By -_- - 30/08/2013 20:31 - United States - Lahaina

Today, I woke up to a warm bed, the morning sunlight bathing my face, and my boyfriend sneaking my credit card out of my purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 060

You deserved it 4 080

By Anonymous - 11/04/2009 16:13 - United States

Today, my Dad called me to tell me that he had finally won the lottery and that I no longer had to worry about trying to find a way to pay for school. I was so excited I started crying. He then told me that he won $5 on a scratch off lotto ticket. He bought a sandwich. Funny dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 460

You deserved it 9 166

So close

By Anonymous - 20/07/2022 06:00

Today, not only did my ex-wife take everything in our divorce, my most recent lottery ticket was off by only one number, I would have won millions and she wouldn’t have been entitled to a penny. Oh well, back to sleeping in my caravan, which is all I have left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 928

You deserved it 150

By AJShow80 - 13/04/2009 08:51 - United States

Today, I won 20 dollars on a lotto scratch off. My friend, pissed, makes me split the money, saying it was collateral for the gas money used to get us there. He then used his 10 dollars on a scratch off, and won 500 dollars. The jackass wouldn't split it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123 263

You deserved it 18 234

By steveinnewsoh - 18/01/2009 19:12 - United States

Today, I went to get a scratch off lottery ticket, and the dude in front of me got the same one I was going to get. He won 500 dollars. I got 2 bucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 003

You deserved it 2 959

Return to lender

By Anonymous - 31/03/2022 21:00 - United Kingdom - Norwich

Today, I woke up and found a trail of £5 notes in my bedroom, which led all the way downstairs and into the bathroom. I got to the last one, where I was then kicked in the balls from behind. It was my sister. She said it was the money she'd borrowed from me. I was left in my underwear writhing in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 321

You deserved it 165

A Dog's Love = Priceless

By Sudokori - 29/08/2017 20:00

Today, I bought a lottery ticket. Two hours ago, I found out that the ticket was worth $100. Five minutes ago, I found my dog eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 385

You deserved it 665

By tine - 16/11/2014 09:44 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 593

You deserved it 3 775

ArtIsResistance7 1

Saturday 10 July 2010 19:30

Well, if I've learned anything from MacGyver, £15, a blanket, and some duct tape, will make a pretty sweet hammock...

chocolatedrop 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 19:26

how much is that n dollars?

Comments

nikemike 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:12

haha

dabowlingman 14

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:19

you deserved it for using £ instead of $.. USA ftw

allen20 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:30

anyone know what ftw means?

ZombieDios 1

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:36

ftw = **** the world >.> yeeeeessss...he/she will believe that

ibanez370 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 21:47

its for the win .. lol :)

duranharold 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:32

how much is that in dollars

fadingaway 17

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:33

How much is that in rands?

zolltf 4

Saturday 17 July 2010 22:31

how much is that in gold mario coins?

nixonskatel 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:38

46 FTW haha

crackerkilla 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:52

stupid nigga

jmoose311 3

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:57

You shouldn't be sleeping with boys before you're married. YDI.

nerdsgetmehot 22

Saturday 10 July 2010 21:00

#53 That is so entirely irrelevant. OP said nothing about having sex with him-- and besides, not everyone shares your views.

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Sunday 11 July 2010 17:52

Ugh, AGAIN with this?! Protip: If you're going to play the self-righteous troll role, the better approach here would be "YDI for gambling."

thefull9yards 4

Saturday 10 July 2010 21:01

same thing happened to me for $4

ashleytiffany 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 21:20

possibly f the world?

Keywords

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Today, after having a long talk with my mother about LGBT rights, she told me that she was totally open. I felt completely relieved, being gay myself. Seconds later, she said, "But not for you. I want you to find me a nice girl that can give me lots of grandkids." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 059

You deserved it 5 241

Today, I dyed my hair blue because I’m cosplaying as Jinx from Arcane. My parents made me practically homeless because they associate hair dye with "wokeness" and they’re not having that shit in their house. I'm now staying with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 205

The Top

Today, I had sex with someone new for the first time after my 10 year relationship ended. The person was a friend who had been making serious sexual references toward me on and off over the year I've known him. I don't know if I'm more embarrassed that he couldn't keep it up, or that I came from anticipation anyways. FML

I agree, your life sucks 989

You deserved it 303

Today, after doing inventory at my job, I was approached by a co-worker who I had always thought was cute. I tried talking to her, but it was hard as I kept trembling and stuttering from spending two hours in a meat locker. Now she assumes that I'm "special". FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 862

You deserved it 2 488

Today, my roommate decided to throw a huge party in the early hours of the morning. I have to start at my new job soon, a window just got smashed, and I'm tired as hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 468

You deserved it 4 102

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 222

You deserved it 6 464

Today, I saw mice eating from my cat's food dish, again. Where is my cat? He's busy bringing in more mice, birds, and once even an unharmed chipmunk through his cat door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 195

You deserved it 5 507

Today, I found out that I was a father, that my son is married, that his wife is pregnant, and that he and his wife would like me to take care of their eldest son during the end stages of the pregnancy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 138

You deserved it 518

Same thing different taste

So close

Return to lender

A Dog's Love = Priceless

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