Money: Today, I woke up with a vague memory of buying something last...

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By fnfantastic - 04/11/2012 16:37 - United States - Warsaw

Today, I woke up with a vague memory of buying something last night while drunk. According to my credit card summary I made a $270 purchase from a home shopping channel. I guess in 5-7 days I'll find out what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 362

You deserved it 30 260

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Same thing different taste

Boozehound

By KamiAzaaaaaa - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - London

Today, I found out my credit card was maxed out to the penny, all thanks to purchases made on an online wine store. Apparently my mother was thirsty enough to steal from her own son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 179

You deserved it 1 622

By DrunkenShopper - 03/09/2012 05:24 - United States - Kirkland

Today, I woke up to a bunch of email notifications confirming all the drunken purchases I made last night on Amazon. Most of them can't be cancelled. This is the fourth time in a month. An "ironic" wolf-howling-at-the-moon t-shirt anyone? FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 143

You deserved it 36 567

Ambien dissociation

By Anonymous - 24/11/2009 12:53 - United States

Today, I woke up after taking a sleeping pill for the first time. I started in on a number of chores, including paying bills, when I noticed a new charge on my online credit card bill from 1am. I bought $120 worth of meat from an infomercial. It's non-refundable. I'm vegetarian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 173

You deserved it 12 207

Guess I'm going to Boston

By Anonymous - 27/02/2023 16:00

Today, I woke up with a hangover. Reading my texts and emails, I then sort of remembered that in my drunken haze I'd booked a non-refundable flight to the wrong city for the same day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 162

You deserved it 1 025

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 19:03 - Canada

Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 633

You deserved it 34 449

By fmfl - 17/11/2009 21:19 - United States

Today, I found a gift card under my bed that I lost a few months ago for $400 to a store that went out of business last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 282

You deserved it 13 142

Drunk online shopping FTW!

By danielesnaranjo - 31/10/2019 16:00

Today, after waking up with the worst hangover in years, I got a bank notification that my credit card was maxed out. Apparently, I bought a $1500 plane ticket for my ex-girlfriend to come over this weekend. She’s in South America. FML

I agree, your life sucks 697

You deserved it 2 287

By life_suxxx - 06/12/2009 07:43 - United States

Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. Several hours later I realize that I can't find my wallet. After looking all over my house and then the store parking lot, I had my credit cards cancelled. On the drive home, I feel something under me. It was my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 337

You deserved it 33 565

By Anonymous - 26/03/2012 01:10 - United States

Today, I woke up in jail charged with a DWI. I wasn't drinking last night and the only thing I remember is taking my prescription sleep medicine and lying down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 376

You deserved it 2 586

Money money money

By Anonymous - 27/10/2023 20:00

Today, my fiancé and I got a joint account recently, but when I got home he was on the phone to the bank claiming our credit card number was cloned, because of the ridiculous number of random purchases. I checked my online banking. It was all just my normal buying habits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 697

nancem 7

Sunday 4 November 2012 18:47

Lots of snuggies and sham wows

that1guyyy 12

Sunday 4 November 2012 18:47

Betty crocker's complete set is awesome!

Comments

lashes_to_ashes 14

Monday 5 November 2012 11:46

I'm sorry but that's really funny

thetechdude22 0

Monday 5 November 2012 12:56

Keep us updated

the_red_baron 3

Monday 5 November 2012 13:32

My old roommate did this before. He ended up with samurai swords

bored1091 4

Monday 5 November 2012 17:28

That's awasome

PunkCupcake 12

Monday 5 November 2012 21:01

Please keep us updated on this! I'm really curious now!

KiddNYC1O 20

Monday 5 November 2012 22:32

It's one of those kinky ass toys for women.

doglover100 28

Monday 5 November 2012 23:11

I want to know what it was.

urbanimpression 6

Tuesday 6 November 2012 9:40

Lol ydi but that's hilarious

Theringking 1

Wednesday 7 November 2012 1:02

I'd say it was a Christmas Present from yourself.

MooseKnuckle503 11

Wednesday 7 November 2012 6:21

I've done that to many times

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Keywords

Shopping Money Capitalism Food Embarrassing Cars Work Relatable Poopoo peepee DIY Health Art Annoying Music Party Birthday Singing Miscellaneous My ex Love Awkward Gun control Intimacy Weird Sex Lonely Crush Customers Coworkers Vacation

The Top

Today, I found out I only exist because my parents hated each other. They both worked in the same office and despised each other, until they had a hate-fuck in a storeroom after a blazing argument, resulting in me. I exist due to sex fuelled by hatred and lust. Yay me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 971

You deserved it 206

Today, I was waxing my legs and somehow dropped an enormous dollop of hot wax on my naked crotch. I refused to yank it off, but still had to cut it off with scissors. So now I have a huge patch of pubic hair way shorter than the rest of it. It looks a right mess FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 037

You deserved it 1 084

The Top

Today, I participated in the "Color Run," an event where you walk across town while people douse you with colored powder. They have yet to implement a rule saying you can't hit people in the face. My ears are pink and blue, my hair's orange, my lips and beard are purple, and I can see better WITHOUT my glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 311

You deserved it 820

Today, I slipped on some ice and wrecked my back. When my husband and I went to go to bed, he begged me to take one of the pain pills left over from his recent surgery. Not so I could feel better and get some rest, but so he could have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 284

You deserved it 3 977

Today, I finally got to come home after hours spent in a locked down ER after a car accident. My injuries were non life-threatening, but pretty damn painful. I asked my sister to pick up my pain meds from the pharmacy for me. She got drunk and "lost them", AKA gave them to her dirtbag boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 991

You deserved it 310

Today, I locked myself out of the house. After hours of ringing the doorbell and calling my roommate, I decided to break the window. When I finally got in, my roommate was waiting with a can of pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 735

You deserved it 3 235

Today, I was talking to my boss when I let slip, "Love you, bye," at the end of a phone call out of habit. We both paused, and then he hung up without saying a word. FML

I agree, your life sucks 285

You deserved it 194

Today, I walked in on my fiancé while he was masturbating to the Spice Girls movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 384

You deserved it 810