By spiderwoman - 04/11/2012 17:12 - Iceland - Reykjav

Today, while walking home, I really had to pee, so I decided to do my business in some high grass just off the street. When I got home, I felt an itch between my butt cheeks. I went to the bathroom to check it out, and a dead, apparently crushed spider fell out of my underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks 22 726
You deserved it 13 576
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Top comments

zebraumicornz 6

No f the spiders life for being an asswipe! Haha....no.......ok...

242 13
JustKittyKat 24

I hope it didn't bite you in any intimate areas! D: I've gotten ant bites in bad places from sitting on the sidewalk near grass one time. You can't scratch that anywhere!

88 4

Comments

zebraumicornz 6

No f the spiders life for being an asswipe! Haha....no.......ok...

242 13
samasara 20

Haha.....yes.....okay. Just kidding. No.

5 28
Thelnternet 7

and here we can see a common species of a "Thumbs Up *****" where the creature ends their comment with phrases such as "Haha... No... Okay I'll go now..." in an attempt to get good ratings[/s]

39 11
RaggleFrock 13

61 I read that in David Attenboroughs voice. Bravo.

11 1
DKjazz 20

The firetruck is a solitary killer. The ambulances will have to wait their turn.

12 1
Potato_Pi 7

You shouldn't go into the tall grass alone, wild Pokemon can jump out at you

11 1
zebraumicornz 6

61- I wasn't trying to be a "thumbs up *****" I didn't think it was that funny and didn't want to offend anybody.

1 2
blcksocks 19

You're either having an ****** or just wanted to be the first one to comment

45 5
iOceanus 18

Wait, who says, "Oh, dear God!" when they ******?

37 3
a_commenter 3

21- someone who's been reading too much 50 shades of grey

11 0
MalloryKnox 8

For a second there I thought 43's comment said "FISTgasm." Yikes.

21 1
boarderlyne17 8

56 - Thanks for making me clench involuntarily. :/

14 0
HouseElf 13

Perhaps clenching was exactly what OP did....

5 1
zingline89 18

Girl: Hey hunny, I'm kinda bored with our sex life. What do you say we spice it up a bit? Guy: *excited* Okay!! What are ya thinkin?!? Girl: Well, Im thinking you strip me naked, tie me face down on the bed... Guy: Yeah!?!?!!!??? Girl: Then shove a spider up my butt Guy: .....wtf....

83 5
misspulkadot24 17

Yep. Nothing turns me on more than an insect up my arse!

40 7
zingline89 18

Is a llamafish an insect?

5 20
JJJJJakkkkeee 6

Is mayonnaise an instrument?

69 3
SqueakyChipmunk 21

No, Jake. Mayonnaise is not a instrument. Neither is a MacBook. *glares at Skrillex*

59 6
onlychildFTW 33

This isn't a fetish. How would you even think that?

1 12
_krystallynn_ 11

sarcasm, it must be a new concept to you...

6 2
kennaem1 11

No Patrick, mayonnaise is not an instrument!

3 1
JustKittyKat 24

I hope it didn't bite you in any intimate areas! D: I've gotten ant bites in bad places from sitting on the sidewalk near grass one time. You can't scratch that anywhere!

88 4
gc327072 30

At least it wasn't an asscricket, eh?

25 7
Srs_business 7

*chirp chirp* Sorry to crush your hopes.

4 0
RoBi1475 0

Don't go into the long grass!!!!!!

31 2
a_commenter 3

The wild spider used pants attack! It was super effective! OP fainted!

11 0
spiritfang11237 16

Should've brought her pokemon.

11 0
trellz17 19

Jurassic Park? Nice.

3 11
kotana191 8

I think the spider had it worse than you did, OP

63 1
KMtheDrummer 6

Squished to death by ass cheeks... Yeah FHL

26 0
DohIMissed 6

I hope it was not a black widow or something.

12 3
kman8599 8

If it was, she just reunited in spidey heaven with her departed. Rest in peace good buddy, rest in peace.

2 1
emeraldisle 30

And this is why I don't do my business outside.

24 1
samasara 20

But... Of course you do... Your a cat... Unless your a house cat! ... Which most are.. Okay. I'm stupid. Bye.

9 8
samasara 20

Your best comeback is correcting me... :0 hahah

2 6