Work: Today, it was my first day working at a library. I expected it...

By fishingforubies2 - 24/07/2015 14:02 - Aruba - Oranjestad

Today, it was my first day working at a library. I expected it to be fun and peaceful, not to end up having to call the cops on a guy who started jerking off into a book. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 984

You deserved it 1 845

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Risky business

By PleaseCalmDownThisIsALibrary - 30/06/2023 16:00 - United States - Columbia

Today, I'm just a simple librarian. Last week, we had to call the cops on two separate aggressive patrons. Today, I had to call the cops yet again. WTF? FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 88

It wasn't me

By weliveanddie14 - 07/05/2009 20:27 - United States

Today, I was at the library. I went near the computer section when I saw this man cursing and pounding his fists on a computer. He left. I thought I'd check it out. As I sat down, a librarian came over with the security guard and pointed at me. I'm now being fined for destroying public property. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 916

You deserved it 15 675

By alwaysxgettingxshitxon - 03/07/2009 00:18 - United States

Today, I was working at the library. Some punks thought it would be funny to shit in a book, close it and return it in the drop box. The fact that it was sitting outside in the ninety degree heat for a couple hours did not help the stench; it was everywhere and I had to clean the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 221

You deserved it 2 948

By Anonymous - 21/05/2019 12:00

Today, while volunteering at my local library, a guy who smelled like crap followed me around all day. Every time I would bend over to shelf a book, he would start grunting. Apparently, he's going to be at the library every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 948

You deserved it 106

Throw the book at him

By Jen - 30/04/2019 20:00

Today, I got fired from my job at a library for hitting an old man with a book. In my defence, I had asked him about a massive water stain on a book he'd returned. He told me it was his cum, wanted to know if it excited me and then tried to touch my boobs. Dirty old pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 229

You deserved it 280

By rubgy_lover - 27/06/2013 15:02 - Canada - Surrey

Today, at work, I politely asked a patron to be quieter; I was hit in the face. I work in a library. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 109

You deserved it 3 922

Getting some action

By hugadyle - 18/04/2020 14:00

Today, I took a trip to the library's public computer section to get some important work done. After a bit of work, I went to stretch only to see that the man next to me was watching some adult films on his computer and discreetly touching himself. I still had 58 minutes of computer time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 623

You deserved it 184

My short hair!

By Trama1201 - 04/01/2020 14:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I went to the library to bring back some books, I walked up to the counter and the librarian turned to me and said "What can I do for you young man?" I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 780

You deserved it 330

Freakout

By LoLWut?? nd Why?? - 16/04/2013 04:01 - United States

Today, I went to a library to return a book that I've had for years. After a heated discussion with the librarian, not only did she charge me over a hundred dollars for the book, she also called the cops to escort me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 603

You deserved it 47 675

By FallCameEarly - 27/02/2014 06:21 - United States - Alhambra

Today, at my job as a librarian at an old library, I was shelving books. Things were great until one entire bookshelf fell over. The damage wasn't too bad. Then the rest fell down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 117

You deserved it 3 881

Welshite 39

Saturday 25 July 2015 1:25

Gives a whole new meaning to the term "book worm".

wheresmymary 22

Saturday 25 July 2015 1:25

He was just trying to keep your first day interesting

Comments

LadyLuck93 20

Saturday 25 July 2015 3:11

People are fkn strange.

saymynamess 19

Saturday 25 July 2015 3:21

Biology book?

paramor3 23

Saturday 25 July 2015 3:31

Was it, "Jack and the Beanstalk" ?

Miss_Whipped 43

Saturday 25 July 2015 3:53

This isn't much better, but it's more like 'Jacking the Beanstalk.'

paramor3 23

Saturday 25 July 2015 4:24

Lol, yeah...that was the idea! :P

katachristic 19

Saturday 25 July 2015 5:08

"Jack be nimble, Jack be--quick! The librarian is coming!"

Ted_brosby 4

Saturday 25 July 2015 3:41

You expected to have fun working in a library? What book was it?

Peachy2392 26

Saturday 25 July 2015 6:45

I work at a public library and it's the best job I've ever had. The patrons can be a bit crazy, and honestly the adults are worse than the children in most cases, but overall it's amazing. It's definitely not a profession I'd expect to find some happiness in but it's the best. Point is, don't knock it till you try it.

worldclassrager 39

Saturday 25 July 2015 3:42

That's what fifty shades can do for you...or something more erotic

klipper57 12

Saturday 25 July 2015 3:43

Sorry about that

upsetpastry 10

Saturday 25 July 2015 4:25

My dick was in the Guinness Book of World Records. Till the librarian made me take it out.

meghancuma 14

Saturday 25 July 2015 4:52

Was the book 50 Shades of Grey?

Mortoli 30

Saturday 25 July 2015 5:03

was it the book about the girl who puts her chest against the windows? lol ive heard of it... kids were reading it at my school kept forgetting the name of it so never got to read it... lol