Kids: Today, my 12 year old cousin decided that "all men are pigs"... - FML

By Ann - 31/05/2011 16:47 - United States

Today, my 12 year old cousin decided that "all men are pigs" and deleted every male contact in my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 182

You deserved it 4 901

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By DCarreon - 04/10/2012 07:13 - United States - Ceres

Today, my seemingly normal girlfriend decided to erase every girl's name out of my phone. Family and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 326

You deserved it 3 264

Cruel winter

By Not funny! - 22/02/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, my uncle stole my cousin's phone to take a picture of me. He then sent said picture to my cousin's boyfriend, saying that she'd been cheating on him with me for over a year. He's been cheated on before and is hysterical. My uncle then had the nerve to act all defensive when my cousin and I exploded at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 579

You deserved it 77

Jealousy

By jake - 10/01/2021 18:02 - United States - Denver

Today, my girlfriend demanded that I delete all my female contacts or she’d set my stuff on fire. Yes, that includes my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 082

You deserved it 259

By jakeson12 - 24/11/2012 00:38 - United Kingdom - Dundee

Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 939

You deserved it 3 539

By amber - 13/03/2010 09:03 - United States

Today, I bitched out my boyfriend for logging into my facebook account and deleting EVERY male (even family) off my friends list. He accused me of wanting to cheat on him and has forced me to say "sorry." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 848

You deserved it 17 735

They hated her because she spoke the truth

By Anonymous - 21/08/2021 06:01

Today, I threw a pillow at my 8 year-old cousin while play-fighting. She gave me a look, then muttered, "You don't have any girlfriends and the girls that talk to you probably have no taste." FML

I agree, your life sucks 775

You deserved it 114

By alissa_roar - 18/04/2011 17:54 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of two years told me I was being too obsessive. This is the guy who has gone through my phone two separate times and deleted all of my male contacts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 790

You deserved it 8 508

By brittbrat4 - 13/08/2011 06:51 - United States

Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 306

You deserved it 36 635

No introductions needed

By Anonymous - 18/02/2023 09:00 - United Kingdom - Bangor

Today, my younger half-sister discovered my existence. She then went to our grandparents' house, smashed my picture off their wall, and ransacked their house looking for other pictures of me to destroy. She's in her mid-twenties, behaving like a child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 099

You deserved it 105

Don't you know that you're toxic?

By Anonymous - 07/07/2020 23:02

Today, I found out my girlfriend talks to around 18 other men for fun. She says she loves me more, but I told her to prove it, so I took her phone and deleted the social media accounts that she made just for these men. Now I'm a "toxic controlling monster" because I don't let her chat with random men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 694

You deserved it 810

Next

Top comments

faithe92 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 22:20

start em off early

Keyman1212 14

Tuesday 31 May 2011 22:20

I don't look like a pig

Comments

blackbeauty1122 7

Wednesday 1 June 2011 4:22

aww lol i know how u feel thumbs up for having an annoying little brother/cousin

Zdog101 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 4:27

boy or girl???????

hoopla12345 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 4:36

Smart kid lol.

atomicbaboon 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 4:43

without men, women wouldn't be able to reproduce.

brunettegurly 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 5:00

future lesbian

CorinnaHEY 6

Wednesday 1 June 2011 5:29

She's right [:

lowshadows 21

Wednesday 1 June 2011 5:32

hey not all of us men are scum, some of us are pretty decent and are considerate of women's feelings.

MagicMarker 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 5:53

Pretty damn smart 12-year-old!

fmlsaves 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 6:21

passwords are a beautiful thing

AssassinBug 15

Thursday 31 October 2013 0:20

She might have figured it out. By the way, why do we have numbers as the first thing below our contacts? Why not our names? Also, Ann, you should throw bacon at her and say "Enjoy the man!".

ReynshineCutting 10

Wednesday 1 June 2011 6:29

Without women, men would've starved.

5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12

Keywords

Miscellaneous Awkward Love Money Racism My ex Harassment Embarrassing Work Accident AITA Am I overreacting? Religion Health Relatable Gifts LGBTQIA+ Annoying Inappropriate Teachers Education Dogs Animals Relationship advice Cute Cats Friends Transportation Cars Scams

The Top

Well. I must admit when I first received today's illustration, seeing the massive pliers pop out kind of freaked me out. Then I reached the last panel and I'm not sure if it's out of anxiety relief or what, but I laughed so hard I might have choked a...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Okaeri! I hope you had a great week out in the cold (most of our southern hemisphere friends don't know what they're missing). Personally, since I discovered this website I couldn't have been better. This week we're welcoming an atypical artist sinc...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

The Top

Today, I had an argument over whether or not I should buy some flowers. With myself. Out loud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 262

You deserved it 29 458

Today, I came home after just 3 weeks of being away. It seems like my pool now has its own mini-ecosystem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 882

You deserved it 5 505

Today, my mom laughed about hearing me singing in the shower and told our whole family. I wasn't singing, though. I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 045

You deserved it 2 952

Today, my manager rejected my leave application for Christmas. Later I found out that I'm going to be the only employee working at the office during Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 960

You deserved it 3 234

Today, my husband got jealous of my new vibrator. I got the vibrator to "spice things up" between us, because he hasn't touched me in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 756

You deserved it 595

Today, a friend of mine has stopped brushing his teeth, because, "animals don’t brush their teeth either." You know what else animals don’t do? Smoke a pack of Marlboros a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 037

You deserved it 76