Kids: Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake...

By badmom101 - 16/05/2009 11:26 - Canada

Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 690

You deserved it 6 400

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Same thing different taste

By B - 18/04/2011 08:09 - United Kingdom

Today, I thought it would be funny to tickle my daughter's foot, which she hates. One bloody nose, multiple scratches and 4 toe-shaped bruises later, she's the one laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 642

You deserved it 58 256

By Anonymous - 21/10/2014 15:49 - United States - Bedford

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 822

You deserved it 7 808

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By fmlfmlfml - 02/06/2009 18:03 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunderstorm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 959

You deserved it 252 003

By nyu - 25/01/2010 06:33 - United States

Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 117

You deserved it 24 471

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By almyric - 02/10/2019 12:02

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a foot massage. I learned that his feet are ticklish when he kicked me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 448

You deserved it 286

By shitface - 25/01/2010 10:18 - Australia

Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 562

You deserved it 3 441

By Anonymous - 18/03/2011 09:25 - United States

Today, I was woken up by my 5 year-old daughter hitting me with a pillow because she had a dream that I was using her toothbrush on the dog. We don't have a dog. She is now refusing to brush her teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 154

You deserved it 4 172

By cheerymama - 23/01/2012 00:49 - United States

Today, I did my old "toe-touch" cheerleading move to try to impress my 5-year-old daughter. When I landed, I broke my toe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 951

You deserved it 26 148

By peepeepants - 18/08/2009 12:35 - Canada

Today, I went to get a pedicure for the first time. My feet are VERY ticklish. I reflexively kicked the poor lady in the face, as I wet my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 597

You deserved it 17 435

By Nerrh - 12/03/2011 10:53 - Australia

Today, I tickled my girlfriend, and her first reflex was to swing her elbow back and break my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 236

You deserved it 33 652

DarrenJonBanks 0

Monday 8 February 2010 8:48

That'd be quite hard, seen as it's a woman.

australiaaaa 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 16:35

guys, it's not the dad. the OP's name is badMOM101 lol but seriously, OP, make sure you explain that to the school if she bruises

Comments

hahayou12345 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 17:15

Ouch, poor girl.

bpw1986 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 17:30

"i beat up my 5 yr old. F my life" lol

UGADawg08 1

Saturday 16 May 2009 17:33

Just admit you did it on purpose. I would.

Misanthropist 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 17:35

NIce ;) That'll teach her

almostouttt 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 17:35

there's no 'e' in tickling . not to be the grammar police or anything .

CinderellaMella2 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 18:00

I can't even say this is a ydi, because it's totally a sdi. She deserved it. Hopefully you didn't leave a mark or anything. LoL.

pancakelover 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 18:06

I hope she didn't team up with Daddy to get you something really nice for Mother's Day. Nice trade off!!

darkmis1 17

Saturday 16 May 2009 18:11

Ouch-that poor kid :-( At least u didn't do it on purpose tho.

Devin_Duke 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 18:17

This really isn't an FML, This story is pretty tame

pinkfrenchrose 5

Saturday 16 May 2009 18:30

o.o Aw...

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I agree, your life sucks 5 458

You deserved it 518

Today, after about a year of keeping it a secret from my girlfriend, I told her about my foot fetish. She said "EWWWWWWWW!" and left. She's ignoring my calls and has changed her relationship status to single on Facebook. FML

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You deserved it 317

Today, I was feeling a little frisky and started making out with my husband on our couch. He had just taken off my shirt when a strange smell hit my nose. I turned my head and saw my alcoholic neighbor with a cigarette in his hand, watching the entire thing unfold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 148

You deserved it 897

Today, I’m on a mission in Africa. My company driver is so old, deaf and half blind that I have to scream what is written on all the road signs at him, and tell him to which way to turn… so he can point the car in that general direction and hope for the best. FML

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You deserved it 64

Today, my cat head-butted me awake as usual. I reached to pet him, but it wasn't his face I touched. It was the still-twitching corpse of the disemboweled rat he held in his jaws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 545

You deserved it 4 164

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to meet his parents. They informed me they were lawyers throughout the meal, which explained the gorgeous house. My boyfriend excitedly told them I was promoted manager at my job. They asked where I work. I work at Burger King. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 597

You deserved it 8 725

Today, I was at a pool party. My friend's little sister pushed me in the pool. When I got out, I pushed her in. She started screaming, and I started laughing because I thought she was pissed that I pushed her in. That wasn't why she was screaming. She can't swim. Her whole family witnessed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 710

You deserved it 20 265

Same thing different taste

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