Miscellaneous: Today, my 5 year old swallowed her loose tooth, which she was...

By shoelace18 - 06/09/2009 04:19 - Canada

Today, my 5 year old swallowed her loose tooth, which she was going put under her pillow for the toothfairy. My wife then told her 'what goes in must come out'. And now everytime she does number 2, she makes me dig for her lost tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 885

You deserved it 5 969

Halloween: Terror and Laughter
Discover stories that combine fright and humor for an unforgettably funny Halloween. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By laptitesouris - 31/03/2013 23:35 - France - Pertuis

Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 135

You deserved it 7 102

Felt cute, might delete myself later

By being a fairy is hard - 28/10/2021 08:00

Today, my daughter lost a tooth. I wanted to make the Tooth Fairy experience extra special, so I dipped her doll's feet in paint to leave “tracks” from the window to her bed. As I was adding the finishing touches and spreading glitter, I tripped on a toy, faceplanted and lost my own tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 134

You deserved it 392

By snapped - 13/11/2009 04:19 - United States

Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me if the tooth fairy was real. I said yes, and she said she wanted to try to catch her. Later, she pulled out a tooth and put it under her pillow. I came in to take out the tooth and replace it with money. There were mouse traps behind her pillow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 117

You deserved it 9 445

By DENTALITY - 23/05/2015 11:06 - Norway

Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 054

You deserved it 3 668

By Fffhjno - 28/09/2016 18:15 - United States - Providence

Today, I saw my two-year-old son trying to floss his teeth. He was using an earthworm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 114

You deserved it 1 195

By Toothy - 02/04/2011 05:03 - United States

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 985

You deserved it 50 045

What am I doing?

By janesays - 24/02/2010 07:45 - United States

Today, my 2 year-old had a large booger blocking his nose so I pulled it out. I was on the phone and absentmindedly rolling it around between my thumb and pointer finger. I put it in my mouth and crushed it between my teeth for a solid minute before I remembered what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 592

You deserved it 66 556

By Jarryd - 10/02/2012 05:40 - Australia

Today, I was making out with a girl who I've had a crush on for a while now. It was all going fine until one of my teeth decided to dislodge itself. She promptly spat out the tooth and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 567

You deserved it 7 503

Gummy

By madeleine - 08/04/2021 05:00

Today, I caught my young daughter eating candy after brushing her teeth. Angry, I asked her if she wanted all her teeth to fall out. She smiled and said, “Yes!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 291

By Anonymous - 03/04/2017 00:00

Today, my husband told my 5-year-old daughter that if I swallowed a watermelon seed, I would get pregnant. Tonight, she dropped one in my mouth while I was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 309

You deserved it 629

graveworm 0

Sunday 6 September 2009 12:05

she's 5 and your how old? how can she make you do anything? get a grip.

PityFool 0

Sunday 6 September 2009 12:05

I don't know what to think, here. Either that's love, or that's just demeaning. This could be the first time she learns about loss, if you stop right now.

Comments

ditzykayla 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 2:09

Yeah when I was little I lost my tooth at kindergarten. My grandma told me all I had to do was write a note to explain and the toothfairy would still come...kids these days are so demanding, and ungreatful. My little brother complained because he only got ten dollars from the tooth fairy.....psh I was lucky to get two.

Roaster 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 3:11

Grow some balls and learn to say no. I've never heard anything more pathetic.

drseuss419 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 5:40

Why not just have her go to bed holding a pillow over her stomach???? The tooth will still technically be under the pillow! If she believes a fairy is going to give her money for a tooth left under a pillow, surely she won't have a problem believing that it still counts if the tooth is in her belly under the pillow.

Violet_Grace 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 19:52

A loving father would do anything for his child. Yeah, it's gross, but if it makes his child happy, then he deserves to be father of the year!

WoodyInNY 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 20:54

This is why you SAVE her old teeth. The you wait a day or two, pretend to be looking, then one time pull the pocketed tooth out and say "found it!"

dELiA14 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 4:26

u know it probably dissolved in the stomach acid? haha ur a moron :)

InspiredByGaGa 8

Saturday 12 September 2009 3:57

YDI for lying to your kis.

NightStar 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 1:08

Why would you do that? You're being commanded to dig through poo by a 5 year old! I swallowed a loose tooth when I was 4, and my parents told me to write a letter to the tooth fairy. It worked! I found two quarters and a responding note under my pillow in the morning. You could try that next time lol. Then you don't have to dig through anything.