Miscellaneous: Today, my bike got stolen because I left my keys in the lock....

By dullstuff - 21/07/2011 12:34 - Belgium

Today, my bike got stolen because I left my keys in the lock. On my way home, I saw my bike in front of a store, unlocked. I jumped on it, only to get punched in the face by the guy that had taken it, and got it stolen from me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 589

You deserved it 13 907

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Same thing different taste

By Amandajean32 - 05/08/2010 00:02 - United States

Today, I came home from work to find the lock to my bike busted and my bike stolen. The worst part was a nicer bike was sitting right next to it without a lock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 835

You deserved it 2 631

By getyourownbike - 12/05/2009 23:11 - United States

Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 809

You deserved it 12 921

By Blue_Heart - 05/09/2015 18:47 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I decided to bike to work. I normally forget the key to my lock, so I leave it out back and hope that nobody takes it, and nobody does. I finally remembered my lock key so I chained it up. After my 7 hour shift, I walk to the back only to find the lock had been cut, and my bike was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 883

You deserved it 1 969

By brokeasscollegelife - 20/11/2015 21:25 - United States - Tallahassee

Today, I biked to the store to buy a new lock, since biking is my only form of transportation. I left my bike unattended for the last time, only to come back with a new chain, but no bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 655

You deserved it 3 458

BIKES!

By cwell88 - 21/06/2015 13:29

Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen, so I went to work. On my walk to work, a girl pulls up on my bike and says I needed to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. She hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass before police surrounded me and accused me of stealing my own bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 775

You deserved it 1 777

By Diesel - 03/05/2011 14:23 - Belgium

Today, my motorcycle was stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, the thief drove past me. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 478

You deserved it 4 589

By Anonymous - 23/12/2016 09:19

Today, I saw a bike locked to a short bollard, making it very easy to steal. Being as nice as I am, I stayed, hoping the owner would come soon and no one else would take it. Then the guy who bullied me in highschool showed up, asked me what I was doing, laughed at me, took the bike, and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 247

You deserved it 1 240

By UnluckyTeen - 22/10/2009 11:29 - Singapore

Today, I went to retrieve my stolen wallet from a train station. After I collected it, I returned to the place where I'd parked my bike, only to find that my bike had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 870

You deserved it 3 412

Nicked

By TheJeremyMoe - 11/08/2019 14:00 - United States

Today, my bike was stolen. Partially. Since I always locked it up, some asswipe thought it would be funny to steal the handlebar stem and the seat, leaving the actual handlebar dangling by the brake cables. Since there was no way to steer or sit, I had to carry my bike one mile back to my dorm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 692

You deserved it 117

iPod Classic, 7th Gen, 160 Go, the best ever

By abdominates - 23/10/2009 16:48 - Canada

Today, after a long workout I come back to my locker, to find my lock had been cut. I looked inside realizing my phone and iPod had been stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, my keys were gone. I ran out to the parking lot to find an empty spot where my car had once been parked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 858

You deserved it 3 231

kellanlvr 1

Thursday 21 July 2011 18:56

Grand Theft Auto: Bike Edition

moop256 10

Thursday 21 July 2011 18:59

well you have to rip off the bicycle seat and see to it he is anally raped by the pole while he makes his get away ;)

Comments

coolcatgarcia 0

Thursday 21 July 2011 23:37

just find a gullible kid and ask him if he wants to see some cool bike tricks...... then when he least suspects it, whaam the old fork in the eye.

Friaza 29

Thursday 21 July 2011 23:39

Shame you didn't find the bike 5 seconds earlier, then it could've been like a movie scene :D

doubleohseven 0

Thursday 21 July 2011 23:54

you do know that they don't make each bike individualized don't you?

SeedlessMe 13

Friday 22 July 2011 1:47

Or is it You that doesn't realize that a bike can be personalized AFTER they purchase it & bring it home?? ;-)

catharsis5 9

Friday 22 July 2011 0:00

why did you leave the keys in your lock in the first place? was it stuck?

Carian01 0

Friday 22 July 2011 0:14

You left your keys in the lock. What did you expect? Might as well have put a sign saying "STEAL ME NOW, THUGS". YDI for being a total idiot.

EMILYSLIFE12333 0

Friday 22 July 2011 0:18

THATS SO MEAAN, I'm sorry haha

tae_sunshinee 0

Friday 22 July 2011 0:29

damn dude

SlenderMan_fml 6

Friday 22 July 2011 0:48

Im Slender Man its what I do.

NabbdjuretPerry 0

Friday 22 July 2011 0:49

Have somebody asked about your life story?

SilentTreatment 7

Friday 22 July 2011 1:05

Was it Deebo who took your bike???

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The Top

Today, at work, I'm supervising one person. Recently there's been tension between her and a couple of other coworkers, one of which was her friend. I spent the day running around and trying to smooth things over, just to find out what started this was her walking in on her former friend talking about her behind her back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 96

Today, yet again I had to lie to a date about what I do for a living, because every time I tell someone the truth, that I work in private equity, they have some choice words about "people like me ruining things" and "ruining the housing prices." I feel like an evil James Bond or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 547

The Top

Today, I had to explain what "cashback" was to a customer. She called me a liar and wanted to talk to a manager because she felt I made up the concept. I'm the manager. She wouldn't believe me and waited in the store for an hour. Apparently this is what a Masters degree gets me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 658

You deserved it 4 553

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight. Doubting our relationship, I asked him seriously if he loved me. He looked thoughtful, gathered me in his arms and said, "If I say yes, will you be less pissed?" and then tried to stick his hand down my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 164

You deserved it 16 465

Today, while picking up a birthday cake, I was screamed at by an upset woman for getting special attention from the bakers, and that I was nothing more than an attention-hogging slut. The bakers are my co-workers and I was picking my cake up on my day off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 930

You deserved it 1 943

Today, I was taking the bus home. A dirty homeless man boarded the bus, put his bag on the overhead rack, and sat down. His bag was leaking and dripped onto my shoulder. I asked the man what it was. He said, "Roadkill." I now have dead animal blood on my best business suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 678

You deserved it 3 420

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 192

You deserved it 5 876

Today, I crawled into bed at 2 in the morning. At 6 am, the telephone rang, waking me up. It was a wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 899

You deserved it 13 360

Same thing different taste

BIKES!

Nicked

iPod Classic, 7th Gen, 160 Go, the best ever

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