What's wrong with it is that when you're in a relationship, you don't just think about yourself. Even if something isn't to your advantage, you do it to help your partner--in this case, OP's boyfriend should be providing her emotional support at this very difficult time. If he's absolutely unable to put someone else's needs above his want for alcohol, then he shouldn't be in a relationship at all.

It's exactly what 30 said, it's not about you, it's about showing support for your partner in a difficult time. Refusing to go just because there isn't any alcohol just makes you come across as callous and uncaring, certainly not qualities of a good significant other.

In a relationship, it's important to think about what the other person needs. She will be very upset that her father died. People don't go to a funeral because of the dead... they go for the living. To support each other, mourn together, remember together. She's going to be unhappy, upset, and even if it is "happy" it will emotionally exhausting. As her boyfriend, he's supposed to be there to support her. Big events, such as graduation, celebrating a promotion, a death, the birth of a niece or nephew or little sibling, need to be celebrated by both parts of a relationship. One person provides emotional support and understanding and encouragement to the other person, who will be highly emotional one way or another. Even injuries require support; someone with a broken ankle or severe food poisoning should be able to rely on their partner to take them to the hospital, even if it is inconvenient for the partner. He is avoiding his responsibilities in a social contract with his girlfriend ONLY because it doesn't sound fun. This only works if she also avoids her responsibilities and they have agreed on it beforehand. And he has not. So he is being selfish.

I think I understand, probably don't but it seems to make sense. Sounds a nightmare though. Challenging thing is probably knowing how to do that caring bit. Icecream and hugs would be my guess. You see it's reasons like this I don't think I'd be any good in a relationship! Thank you all for you responses though! Certainly enlightening.

Meet the right person who understands Aspergers. Tell them you want to help but don't know how and flat-out ask them what they need you to do. Teachers are a REALLY good bet for finding the right person to settle down with. We've all taught about ASD, how to recognize the signs, strengths and weaknesses, and how to interact! Many of us will "get it" and know what you are trying to say or do :)

If you were in a relationship and a relative died, wouldn't you want your significant other with you during some or all of the funerary rites? And it's one thing to admit you wouldn't feel comfortable going a wake because you didn't know anyone there and another to cancel your plans to go because there's not going to be any booze served. OP could have used her boyfriend's presence and support to get through what must be a very difficult time, and he's behaving like a jerk.

Most people don't go to wakes and funerals for the entertainment.

How about you don't appoint yourself speaker for all guys...

See I can't do empathy at all. Or at least I don't recognise it if I do. Did you find that and are you better at it now? Is it something that you can work on? I'm 24 now and still can't do it.

It's something you have to work on. I'm Aspie myself and while I do well in some situations, I suck at others. I also didn't realize I was Aspie until I hit my late 30s.