Today, my boyfriend dumped me because he, "just can't keep dating...

By dumpyhair - 16/08/2019 04:04

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because he, "just can't keep dating a girl with so many split ends." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 790

You deserved it 248

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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By Anonymous - 14/07/2024 16:00 - United States - Lafayette

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because I got a haircut without asking for his permission first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 676

You deserved it 112

By dykerino - 12/10/2014 00:11 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I cut my hair short and he didn't want people to think he was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 701

You deserved it 7 552

By meach - 06/08/2011 04:58 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of a bad haircut. She was the one who cut my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 880

You deserved it 4 188

By athlete47 - 03/08/2019 14:00

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I was "changing too much." My big change was a haircut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 672

You deserved it 148

By ginger - 19/08/2011 10:38 - New Zealand

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend because he is tired of everyone giving him shit about my ginger hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 147

You deserved it 6 814

By hairy - 08/03/2012 14:30 - Serbia

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. Apparently, my nose hair scares him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 534

You deserved it 13 812

By lovedoesnotexist - 24/09/2015 11:52 - Belgium

Today, my long-term girlfriend broke up with me because my hair "falls out" and I "will definitely be bald soon", even though it's not that bad. The same girl who I supported through her chemotherapy and gave her promises that I would stay with her no matter how she looked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 539

You deserved it 1 982

By Anonymous - 21/01/2011 09:25 - Monaco

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm "high maintenance." I'd only asked him to use deodorant and brush his teeth. He hasn't had a shower in over a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 234

You deserved it 6 079

By ohman - 02/10/2010 06:28 - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because 'I look like his hamster when I'm eating sunflower seeds.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 598

You deserved it 5 861

By dead - 09/03/2010 00:49 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years left me because apparently I'm "too beautiful and he can no longer handle other guys always trying to flirt with me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 621

You deserved it 6 486

jojimugo 20

Friday 16 August 2019 4:29

Is he gay?

Sonotsuave 35

Friday 16 August 2019 5:33

Yeah sweetheart that’s not the reason, it can’t be

Comments

fjvitt 14

Saturday 17 August 2019 3:07

Is that a conditioned response?

baristalbc 18

Friday 23 August 2019 8:27

With a comment like that, I think he probably just can’t really date a girl.....period. (Speaking from experience)

Keywords

Awkward Embarrassing Miscellaneous Sleep Work Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Teenagers Dogs Animals Video games Gamers Ironic Zoom

The Top

Today, I left something in my boss's office. The door was closed which usually means she isn't in there, so I asked her coworker/friend for the key. When I opened the door, she screamed at me to get out of there. Turns out, she has just stopped breastfeeding her son and was pumping her breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 433

You deserved it 21 176

Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year-old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 391

You deserved it 115 808

The Top

Today, my mom wished her best friend a Happy Birthday on Facebook. Her best friend died this year. Oh, did I mention that it’s also my birthday? FML

I agree, your life sucks 744

You deserved it 127

Today, I honked at a man in a Subway parking lot. He rolled down his window and screamed insults and slurs at me before driving away. Why did I honk at him? He'd left his lunch on top of his car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 332

You deserved it 4 033

Today, my ex of 2 months, who I'm on good terms with, posted an Instagram photo with her new boyfriend, captioned "Love you babe, 4 months have never been sweeter." I've never been good at math, but 4 seems bigger than 2. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 274

You deserved it 304

Today, while on the bus, an old man told me about all the many things he wanted to do with my various orifices. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 182

You deserved it 2 707

Today, my mother came into my workplace to wail on me for "ruining our family's reputation" because I got a girl pregnant. I've been married to the "girl" for 8 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 268

You deserved it 3 317

Today, some jacked-up dude who spends way too much time in the gym actually flipped my car onto its roof, while his friends filmed it, because he said I’d parked in a disabled bay, and he was gonna expose me on YouTube. He must have felt a right fool when he realised it wasn’t even a disabled bay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 242

You deserved it 88

Same thing different taste

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