By Iguana - 12/09/2012 02:35 - Canada - Oromocto

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend invited me over to "play with his lizard." After excitedly rushing across town, I realized this wasn't a euphemism, he actually bought an Iguana. FML
I agree, your life sucks 14 713
You deserved it 28 771
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

FMLshark 12

Sounds like the same boyfriend who wanted to test water displacement in the bathtub with his girlfriend.

491 4
rncannon 18

I would have been pretty excited anyway. Iguanas are cool.

214 5

Comments

chriscrossedya 4

i dont recall ever refering to my penis as a lizard...makes me feel like its got legs. i prefer snake

65 1
A7XCamaro 19

No, a snake is a snake, and a lizard is a lizard. They're, however, both reptiles.

11 0
theluckyones 10

I'm pretty sure if you wanted to play with his other 'lizard' you could've asked or just taken it out yourself and had some fun with if(: I'm pretty sure he would've liked it and you would've gotten what you were so excited about.. Be happy your boyfriend shares stuff like this with you. Have fun with the iguana!

66 1
simplylost643 0

#15- "Just taken it out yourself and had some fun with it". Thank you! Proactive women like yourself is what this world needs more of. Bless your heart!

12 1
outoftown 26

#15, The question is how the iguana would react to another lizard. Competition?

12 1
CaptainSaveAHoe 11

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
9 36
CaptainSaveAHoe 11

this was a reference to a previous FML. are we not allowed to do that here? I'm new.

6 1
Isoldael 27

It's allowed, but judging by the number of downvotes people either didn't recognize it as such, or just didn't find it very funny.

2 0
Crazberry 5

Because apparently this is the way the world works now: No sex makes life worthless and horrible. Hence the amount of sex-related posts on fml. Because, you know, there's nothing worse than not getting laid when you want.

34 4
JAB2010 1

Because most on here are in their teens and 20's, and that's when the juices are flowin' the most! :)

18 5
drkate25 30

"juices are flowin" that's the unsexiest phrase ever.

7 9
simplylost643 0

#51- Try doing anything when the juices aren't flowing and tell me how sexy that is!

14 0
bandit1971 18

Lizards are awesome though :<

7 1
kittykat1501 31

snakes hiss, and the way you put that is the typed version of stuttering. if it was indeed a snake you would type "ssssssorry" instead.

0 0
Tektite 14

LOL ! Oh no OP, that sucks! You should have played with his pet lizard and jumped him afterwards ;D I'm sure he would have gotten the hint then! Better luck next time! *kisses!!!!*

0 7
rainbowbigbird 7

I like to play with my boyfriend's lizard. We call him POGO. Pogo is a bearded dragon. You thought I was talking about...? Oh, you.

5 10
brianfantana32 10

I expected a bearded dragon from the beginning.

5 0
Tragichero92 12

Eragon 2, now comes with a beard.

2 1
XxskyelovexX 13

I would be pumped to play with my boyfriend's lizard if he had one! I don't understand how you can mistake his lizard for...

4 6
TheNewGuy03 28

I'm not entirely sure how the chick even assumed that her dude was talking about his dong. Whatever.

8 1