Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend refused to go down on me because I smelled...

By skiittlez713 - 20/05/2011 08:40 - United States

Today, my boyfriend refused to go down on me because I smelled of baby lotion and it made him feel like a child molester. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 307

You deserved it 16 568

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Same thing different taste

Crotch rot of the mouth

By Anonymous - 25/03/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, as I hadn’t showered yet, I told my boyfriend not to go down on me in case it smelled "down there." We started kissing instead, but he made a "blech" face, then went down on me anyway. Apparently my morning breath was worse than unwashed crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 131

You deserved it 466

To each his own

By Anonymous - 05/10/2023 14:00

Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 237

By Noname - 16/01/2009 20:43 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like vegetables. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 640

You deserved it 6 665

Revenge!

By princess98 - 18/11/2019 05:00

Today, I had to ask my boyfriend to take a shower, because he smelt awful and wanted to cuddle. After 45 minutes, he did so. I wanted to cuddle and fool around after he was done. I got rejected because he didn't want to get dirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 185

You deserved it 814

By hdgyfjdzdfg - 16/04/2012 06:53 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like his grandma's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 076

You deserved it 4 914

What should I do?

By Anonymous - 08/12/2019 20:00

Today, I got a XXX wax, because my boyfriend wouldn't go down on me as he didn't like the hair. Now he won't sleep with me at all because I look like a child with no pubic hair, and he "feels like a pedophile." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 318

You deserved it 586

By hairless - 30/07/2010 06:45 - Australia

I agree, your life sucks 44 443

You deserved it 10 123

Equality

By Anonymous - 04/12/2011 07:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was disgusted because I dropped a Skittle on the floor and ate it. He thought peeing on me in the shower was just fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 231

You deserved it 6 355

What a wuss

By Anonymous - 30/03/2021 08:01

Today, my boyfriend flat out refuses to ever give me oral because it grosses him out when I squirt, and there's no way he wants that anywhere near his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 589

You deserved it 329

Contagion

By Girlygal32 - 13/09/2020 08:02 - United States

Today, my mother chewed me out for not wearing deodorant and smelling of B.O. I was wearing plenty of deodorant. My shirt just smelled like my boyfriend, whom I'd been cuddling with earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 525

THISISCITRUS 0

Friday 20 May 2011 15:55

"But you are."

TheDrifter 23

Friday 20 May 2011 16:04

Are you sure it wasn't the fully shaved look combined with the Dora the explorer panties?

Comments

doubleodoggy 0

Friday 20 May 2011 16:16

change lotions

kaylinmarie 0

Friday 20 May 2011 21:50

exactly

annihil8or 15

Friday 20 May 2011 16:20

Baby lotion feels better than reg. for sure

ant1078 7

Friday 20 May 2011 16:24

use nutella next time:D

sourgirl101 28

Friday 20 May 2011 16:27

Who doesn't enjoy hazelnuts?

kyanisaurus 0

Friday 20 May 2011 16:32

he might not like them skid marks..

LuxAeterna_fml 0

Friday 20 May 2011 16:47

People alergic to hazelnuts. :(

venezuitalian 1

Saturday 21 May 2011 4:29

you can never go wrong with nutella

lbmjtd 1

Friday 3 June 2011 22:49

except if your allergic to nuts

missmaryb 0

Friday 20 May 2011 16:25

Only one reason he'd associate going down and smelling baby lotion with child molesting.

ospeltz1 0

Friday 20 May 2011 16:25

that's a pretty good reason

theonlysweetpea 10

Friday 20 May 2011 16:26

What a dumbass...

ChantelRenaeee 0

Friday 20 May 2011 16:26

well atleast he won't molest children?

GeneralLeeAdyck 0

Friday 20 May 2011 16:41

I think you being 8 yrs old had more to do with it :p

FreebirdIII 1

Friday 20 May 2011 16:53

And him being 25, and answering to the name Chester.

JayBear14 11

Friday 20 May 2011 16:58

or big bird... jk

Bossman11 6

Monday 23 May 2011 6:15

you're picture is awesome

neverbeensosad 4

Friday 20 May 2011 16:44

Can't really blame him TBH...

DoubleAgent00 0

Friday 20 May 2011 16:48

sounds like he has some unresolved issues that require medical attention. get help now

Keywords

AITA Awkward First Dates Love Cute Dogs Animals Am I overreacting? Alcohol Relatable Food Health Thanksgiving Politics Family Holidays Miscellaneous Transportation Cars Sex Intimacy Cheating Suspicious Contraception Poopoo peepee Kids Gross Accident Gifts Birthday

The Top

Today, I went down a water slide. Halfway through, I got stuck behind some kids who were blocking the tube. Seconds later, a big-boned lady crashed into my back. Her solution to break the blockade was to start kicking my back repeatedly as hard as she could. The kids still wouldn't move. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 254

You deserved it 1 970

Today, at my sister's engagement party, my cousins thought it would be funny to get my nanna drunk. They regretted it when she told them, and everyone else at the party about her sex life and how she fakes orgasms with my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 295

You deserved it 9 654

The Top

Today, I’m still recovering from last night. I fell asleep before my boyfriend. He thought it would be funny to stand at the bottom of the bed with a knife and wake me up. I screamed so much that I wet myself and had a panic attack. He recorded the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 040

You deserved it 258

Today, I was fired from the trucking company I work for, due to numerous complaints about my reckless driving. I don't even do driving work there, but my ex keeps calling in to report me, and my boss wanted the calls to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 817

You deserved it 3 369

Today, it was my second day working as a cashier in a drug store. I thought everything went great, but by the end of my shift, my cash register was $10 short. Maybe it wouldn't be that bad if on my first day it hadn't been $30 short. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 865

You deserved it 3 151

Today, while on a vacation, I tried to step out of myself and flirt with this boy who I thought was cute. He was going along with it and nodding so I thought it was working. Then he opened his mouth and I realized he didn't speak English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 213

You deserved it 6 663

Today, I've had a cold for over a week, and I've been coughing so hard, I bruised my ribs. I'm also 8 months pregnant. Guess where my son likes to kick me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 022

You deserved it 137

Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date. I've discussed the fact I like to date older men, but she thought it was clever to send a 63-year-old to my house to, "Netflix And Chill." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 630

You deserved it 2 030