Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the very first time... - FML

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By Anonymous - 29/12/2010 11:25 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the very first time in three years. Apparently, all it took was anal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 689

You deserved it 13 299

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/04/2010 20:36 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. He followed it with, "Want to try anal?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 684

You deserved it 9 741

By not impressed - 09/10/2015 18:27 - Canada - Nanaimo

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 338

You deserved it 4 611

The best method!

By Anonymous - 04/01/2020 18:00

Spicy

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 996

You deserved it 960

Nice try, chief

By Anonymous - 04/04/2011 01:46 - United States

Spicy

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 992

You deserved it 15 194

By Anonymous - 02/06/2009 11:05 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend of over a year finally told me he loved me. This revelation was quickly followed by "at least, I think this is how people feel when they say that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 621

You deserved it 5 389

By Picaresque - 26/02/2009 17:57 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 285 991

You deserved it 68 217

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 001

You deserved it 14 594

Non sequitur

By lisacasabonita - 12/11/2010 16:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, "I wish you liked anal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 226

You deserved it 42 509

Bad timing

By KrissyBearr - 31/12/2011 01:36 - United States

Spicy

Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I loved him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 433

You deserved it 10 018

By Anonymous - 30/04/2014 21:51 - United States

Spicy

Today, the only thing I got for my birthday was my boyfriend's offer to give me "the gift of anal". FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 654

You deserved it 5 535

Next

Top comments

perdix 29

Wednesday 29 December 2010 16:46

It used to be "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach," but now it is apparently "the way to a man's heart is through your asshole." On the other hand, I wouldn't trust an "I love you" that is said right after anal -- he's probably talking shit.

thegooseisloose 0

Wednesday 29 December 2010 19:10

38 I see what you did there.

Comments

Combat_Mushroom 3

Thursday 6 January 2011 23:25

that will do it

dman78100 0

Monday 10 January 2011 5:01

anal even feel good on the girls side?

JustJaredfied 0

Tuesday 11 January 2011 19:44

um not to be mean but did u ever think he might be gay? Kinda a dead give away, in my opinion.

xwingman 0

Friday 28 January 2011 8:29

Like the saying goes "vaginal sex can make your day, but anal sex can make your hole weak" P.S. Id love ya too

rocket123 0

Thursday 24 February 2011 4:20

lmfao

terryx32 0

Monday 31 January 2011 8:13

gg

elwood11 3

Friday 8 April 2011 7:00

hahahahaha #16

Captain0bv10us 0

Saturday 23 July 2011 2:42

Well...god gave us an anus for a reason ;)

Rwcrazy 0

Wednesday 14 September 2011 14:36

Id tell you that too, even if had just met you and we did anal..

muzakfever 0

Monday 26 September 2011 19:24

Aw :( get some self respect OP

nikkij92 1

Thursday 3 November 2011 15:20

**** it took him 3 years?!

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Today, my husband shit himself a little during sex, but tried to keep going because he was "so close" and didn’t want to ruin the orgasm. I, of course, shoved him away but it was already down my leg and had stained our cream bedsheets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 504

You deserved it 199

Today, I taught my kid how to mow the lawn. It's a self-propelling mower so it's easy to handle. My kid thought it would be smart to tie the handle down so that he wouldn't have to push it at all. This resulted in the lawn mower blasting through our fence and sinking into my neighbor's pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 948

You deserved it 7 060

The Top

Today, I was brushing my teeth. As I bent down to spit my mouthful of toothpaste into the sink, my cat decided it would be a good time to stick his head right where I was spitting. I spat a huge glob of toothpaste on his head. He then shook it off all over me and the walls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 647

You deserved it 8 430

Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 516

You deserved it 5 676

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I agree, your life sucks 885

You deserved it 341

Today, I finally went running to help me start losing weight. I got 50 metres before someone in a passing car shouted out "Run fatty, run". I can't work up the courage to go for a run again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 097

You deserved it 7 406

Today, I came home from work to find my things outside my yard and the door locks changed. I called my wife to let me in and she told me to go live with, “That homewrecking whore who texted you last night” instead. She’s talking about my cousin, who informed me via text that my aunt’s in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 438

You deserved it 107

Today, I was driving home with my dad after buying a new truck. We were on the freeway and the engine wasn't revving up very much. My dad thought that something was wrong with my transmission, so he reached over to change gears. Most cars won't go into reverse at high speeds. Mine does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 240

You deserved it 3 130