Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend told me he wanted to hunt Easter eggs before... - FML

By Grrrr! - 23/04/2011 14:19 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me he wanted to hunt Easter eggs before we have sex. I'm glad he has his priorities straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 026

You deserved it 10 939

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
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Same thing different taste

By Mary - 04/12/2011 22:47 - United States

Spicy

Today, while my boyfriend was packing for his annual hunting trip, I saw him slip a box of condoms into his bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 023

You deserved it 4 100

By journey_Jeanne - 08/12/2011 02:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 039

You deserved it 5 159

Please forgive me

By Anonymous - 28/11/2010 23:49 - United States

Spicy

Today, I discovered my boyfriend prays before and after sex, because he thinks he'll keep his abstinence by doing so. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 422

You deserved it 4 916

By Michelle - 27/12/2009 07:13 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me he likes having sex during my period because it makes him feel like he stabbed a small animal to death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 576

You deserved it 4 785

By Anonymous - 28/08/2011 06:54 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend decided to use glow-in-the-dark body paint to make an arrow on his stomach pointing down. I guess he thought he'd "spice up" the way he always demands a blow job before sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 065

You deserved it 6 377

By DallasGal - 14/02/2012 16:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then remembered it was unlimited pancakes at IHOP. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 825

You deserved it 3 878

Say yes

By fuckingdonuts - 18/05/2015 02:54 - United States - Edmond

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 067

You deserved it 5 184

Mr Loverman

By Anonymous - 14/08/2020 08:01

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend asked when I was going to bed, because he wanted to have sex. With himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 705

You deserved it 297

By juliette - 08/10/2012 05:39 - United States - Tucson

Spicy

Today, I surprised my boyfriend with a bag containing condoms and sexy lingerie. He looks into it and says, "I hope you kept the receipt." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 542

You deserved it 4 503

The Lovecats

By HaedLei - 26/11/2013 12:17 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found out my boyfriend has a fetish for cats. I think I'm going to have to meow before we do anything together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 264

You deserved it 5 873

Next

Top comments

chellean11 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 19:38

Me. I don't see an issue with his priorities

ilovehamburgers 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 19:41

hunting Easter Eggs are awesome! and only comes once a year. you can have sex anytime.

Comments

12251984 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 16:41

YDI for having sex before you're married!

averyridesbikes 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 18:31

hahaha Lmfao that sucks

meegsiiee 5

Sunday 24 April 2011 19:15

Not much of a fml......

Adnelson20 2

Sunday 24 April 2011 20:22

So is Jesus, OP.

Oles123 0

Monday 9 April 2012 19:56

Finally someone mentions Jesus :)

ilovefall10 21

Monday 25 April 2011 1:04

*face palm* oh my god OP... seriously? you're pissed off just because he wants to have some fun hunting some easter eggs instead of having sex? which is something you can do ANY DAY. easter only comes once a year. stop freaking out... damn.

chaleighrae7 4

Monday 25 April 2011 3:52

well hey. eggs over orgasms I guess.

randombitches1 0

Monday 25 April 2011 4:01

hmm fake eggs filled with delicious candy ORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR sex? it isnt a hard decision to make candy always wins! duh

whosechairisthat 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:16

giggity if u think about it

daaanielle14 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:40

hide them in your bedroom and tell him to come hunt for them

brillababy 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 8:16

that's fun! I would do it too!

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Keywords

Awkward Love Friends Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable Cars You're fired Work Parenting Kids Family DIY Cats Am I overreacting? Sex Intimacy Management Poopoo peepee Capitalism Coworkers Frustration Dogs Animals ADHD Transportation Dating Health Anxiety

The Top

Today, a field engineer decided to rework everyone's schedule, just because he couldn't be bothered to do a full day's work. Now two of us who would've been busy all day are sat on our phones, and he's off out on "errands". How a day goes depends on how bothered he can be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 707

You deserved it 81

Today, it's only day three of my annual vacation. Rest and relaxation? Afraid not! For the past days, I've been haunted by the constant thought of how much work will be piled up when I get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 139

The Top

Today, on the first occasion I've seen my boss since her brief leave, I brought up how I got to hear all our customers' heartwarming plans for their moms on Mother's Day. Her mother just died. That's why she was on leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 786

You deserved it 271

Today, I went to my new job at a pre-school. I was really excited because everything was going so well, and a little boy even said he was drawing a picture of me. He even gave it to me when he was finished. Well it was me, but I was also on fire and being stabbed and shot multiple times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 114

You deserved it 3 721

Today, after months of job hunting, I finally got a phone call. They were impressed with me. That's when my son decided to throw a tantrum asking for food. After some silence, the caller told me they were looking for someone who wasn't juggling little kids at home and hung up. My son is 20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 038

You deserved it 6 000

Today, I called my boyfriend over and over again and he never answered. His mom just called me and asked how I was holding up. I asked her what she meant and she had to tell me he checked himself into rehab because he was addicted to heroin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 364

You deserved it 3 764

Today, I was sifting through my parents old home movies. I put in one and was horrified to see my parents having sex. I immediately ejected the tape and looked at the label. It said "Bermuda, 1989." They've told me I was conceived in Bermuda around that time. I've seen my own conception. FML

I agree, your life sucks 194 771

You deserved it 37 497

Today, due to nepotism, I lost to a competitor. They rarely contributed to the competition and were literally distracted all the way through. Their quality was pretty low as well, but they were friends with the judge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 714

You deserved it 96