Valentine's slay, Living together and Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then... - FML

By DallasGal - 14/02/2012 16:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then remembered it was unlimited pancakes at IHOP. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 825

You deserved it 3 878

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Same thing different taste

No kinkshaming here

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 04:37 - United States - Northridge

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 096

You deserved it 5 793

Say yes

By fuckingdonuts - 18/05/2015 02:54 - United States - Edmond

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 067

You deserved it 5 184

By Eve - 24/06/2011 10:45 - Ireland

Spicy

Today, as I passed my fiancé the pancakes I had just made, he vocalised his happiness with a groan that was EXACTLY like the one he makes when we have sex. So on a sexiness rating, I'm a pancake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 100

You deserved it 10 727

By Anonymous - 07/02/2015 21:03 - United States - Edison

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend made me breakfast in bed, then we went out shopping, had a picnic, watched a good romcom, had a fancy dinner, and ended the day with great sex. And when the clock struck twelve, he dumped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 451

You deserved it 3 536

By Anonymous - 13/01/2011 21:10 - Lebanon

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 395

You deserved it 5 001

By AprilFlowers - 01/12/2009 17:15 - United States

Today, I woke up early and made my boyfriend french toast. When he woke up, he yelled at me because it was his dish day and I was creating more dishes for him to do. He made me do the dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 191

You deserved it 7 388

By jessica - 02/02/2011 20:59 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 363

You deserved it 7 467

I feel love

By Anonymous - 16/02/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, for Valentine’s Day, I got my boyfriend chocolates, a new Xbox game and planned lots of kinky sexy time. He ate the chocolate, orgasmed after three thrusts, had a 2-hour nap, then ignored me while playing the new game all afternoon. He didn’t get me anything, not even my own orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 790

You deserved it 181

Happy birthday

By Anonymous - 07/09/2024 21:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, for my birthday, I'd told my boyfriend I wanted a full day in bed with Netflix, champagne, frequent sex, and a takeaway pizza at teatime. He managed sex twice 4 hours apart, kept falling asleep watching Netflix, drank too much, and threw up his pizza all over my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 238

By still hungry - 21/04/2012 13:04 - United States - Chicago

Today, my boyfriend said he was going to give me breakfast in bed before he left. He walked over, threw some granola bars on the bed next to me and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 327

You deserved it 4 158

Next

Top comments

hoolie06 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 20:00

So you couldn't have sex afterwards or before?

aricTB 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 20:00

pancakes! yay

Comments

terran0 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 22:14

I go with #24

terran0 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 22:17

ya I would got for the pankakes u can have sex any other day but unlimmited pancakes for1 day

cmac86 23

Sunday 14 February 2010 23:07

shouldn't have sex before marriage, so ydi.

Aggriken 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 0:26

hey you, shut up.

ComMed 0

Monday 15 February 2010 0:08

your either ugly or fugly and he is using you bc he is ugly too. but he knows why you two have sex in the dark and figured if I can get pancakes all day, what else can I hav all day

eddieboy1 0

Monday 15 February 2010 0:19

lol... u pathetic !!!

Aggriken 0

Monday 15 February 2010 1:28

Today, I wanted to have sex. My boyfriend decided that food was more important. FML

bunny911 16

Monday 15 February 2010 3:54

seriously? who the f**k wouldn't take pancakes over sex?

spidergirl41 0

Monday 15 February 2010 4:19

Ahh. that sounds wrongly tasty

demoon_fml 7

Monday 15 February 2010 4:24

Omg I can't believe I missed unlimited pancake day at ihop. FML!

champsof07 0

Monday 15 February 2010 6:22

I agree. win.

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The Top

Today, myself and my pug entered a novelty dog competition at the local fair. We won first prize in the lookalike contest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 282

You deserved it 233

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 2 156

The Top

Today, I learned my dad is the kindest, most generous, hard-working soul anyone has ever met. He'll give someone the shirt off his back if they need help. Except for us, his immediate family, whom he screams and cusses at daily, expects to do everything ourselves, and thinks we're incompetent when we need help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 540

You deserved it 115

Today, I found my checking and savings account to both read $0.00. My parents transferred all my money to theirs because "I'm irresponsible, and not fit to handle money." I'm a 3.8 college student and have a full-time job. They are currently unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 893

You deserved it 3 898

Today, I was marking exams. I then had to explain to many of the students that (a) pigs are not aquatic animals and (b) sharks do not have lungs. These are university students. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 212

You deserved it 4 079

Today, I noticed white stuff in my colored clothes as I transferred them from the washer to the dryer. That's when I realized that the white stuff is my paycheck which I had put in my pants earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 143

You deserved it 15 025

Today, a coworker complimented me on losing weight, and said that she wished she could drop a few pounds too. I was too embarrassed to tell her that the only reason I've lost weight is because I haven't been able to afford to eat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 103

You deserved it 3 923

Today, at work, a customer asked where the shovels were. I tried to ask him if he was looking for snow shovels or regular shovels. It came out, "Are you looking for show snovels?" He then awkwardly said he was looking for snow shovels. FML

I agree, your life sucks 739

You deserved it 163