Geek: Today, my brand new and very expensive laser printer does actually...

By harry - 06/12/2008 07:51 - France

Today, my brand new and very expensive laser printer does actually print 10 times faster than my old one. Except there's nothing printed on the paper. Never mind, at least it makes a cool sound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 756

You deserved it 4 149

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/09/2013 19:50 - United States

Today, I had to visit a client because his printer had broken down. After driving for an hour, then being screamed at about how horrible my company's service is, I walked over to his printer and found the problem: there was no paper loaded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 400

You deserved it 3 126

By OhaiiKid - 07/03/2010 05:02 - United States

Today, I was home alone. It was very dark and so I went to turn on the lights, when I heard the sound of a gun loading. I dropped to the floor but never heard a gun fire. I got up and heard the sound again. When I got lights on, I discovered it was only my printer telling me it was out of paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 481

You deserved it 26 060

By MrandMrsRendon20 - 11/11/2010 00:26 - United States

Today, I complained to my boss about how my printer wasn't printing colored ink even though I had just installed a new cartridge yesterday. Upon investigation, she noted that I forgot to take off the protection sticker from the cartridge. Good job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 284

You deserved it 29 915

By Nathan - 17/01/2009 22:31 - United States

Today, I printed my 10 page econometrics problem set questions out on $15/100 sheet ivory resume paper that I'd accidentally left in the paper tray on my printer. It turned out to be the wrong assignment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 701

You deserved it 18 628

Do it on company time

By Ayeya - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I wanted to print out a 100-page game strategy guide using company's printer. While not wanting anyone to find out about this, I picked a time when I thought no one would be printing. My CEO ended up standing next to me for 10 minutes, waiting for his stuff to print after mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 861

You deserved it 74 938

Self-care

By Mee - 05/10/2009 10:49 - Kuwait

Today, I was frustrated at work so to have fun, I wrote an email to myself saying that I was great and loved myself and should relax. I used all different colors and fonts. Instead of hitting "delete", I hit "print" without realizing. My manager got it out of the printer and put it on my desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 696

You deserved it 39 393

By Anonymous - 20/10/2015 14:40 - United Kingdom - Oxford

Today, I went to the print shop to get some work printed. The guy serving me printed my entire order wrong because he pushed the wrong button, so it had to be done again. He tried to charge me a fine for the mistake he made because "it's not a viable business otherwise". FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 252

You deserved it 1 586

By Anonymous - 23/12/2015 17:11 - Germany

Today, as I passed a printout over my shoulder to my mum, I managed to give myself a papercut on my tear duct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 661

You deserved it 2 699

By Canonlizardjet - 13/02/2017 08:00 - United States - Ormond Beach

Today, I had a near-death experience. Went to print a document and a lizard shot out of the printer right out at me. Gives a whole new meaning to a Canon printer, a fricking lizard Canon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 578

You deserved it 596

By smidgit - 19/05/2016 17:32

Today, after many days of messing around with wording and pictures, a huge and expensive printed card order came in to the office. I spelt the first word wrong. I can't get a refund. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 902

You deserved it 9 858

mrmofong0 0

Friday 13 February 2009 15:50

take the little tape thing off the cartridge.

spazzmckiwi 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 23:17

How brand new? What's the return policy? btw I like how FML has turned into a tech support blog.

Comments

yayitsmeh 0

Monday 15 June 2009 2:21

guys it's not ink. it's a toner 0_o but really, run some test pages.

doodlebug13 15

Tuesday 14 July 2015 13:05

Whatever it is, that may be the only problem.

Stpatch754 0

Friday 10 July 2009 20:36

loser much?

warsun 27

Saturday 1 March 2014 11:09

No not really

tpag3r 0

Thursday 23 July 2009 8:12

the cool sound is totally worth it

doodlebug13 15

Tuesday 14 July 2015 13:06

Agreed

taylor309 0

Saturday 25 July 2009 22:38

I like this one :) very positive

saskiia1 0

Friday 28 August 2009 20:33

hahaha this is awesome

silly_kate 0

Tuesday 22 September 2009 4:02

COOL SOUNDS FTW!!!

sj_fml 0

Tuesday 17 November 2009 13:46

"cool sounds!" XD

BlueJeans2626 0

Monday 25 January 2010 3:55

lol nice

dante899 0

Monday 15 February 2010 8:46

sounds like a mlia moment to me...

Kgirl2cute 6

Sunday 2 May 2010 4:27

I know right! all you need to do is explain to the store what happened. it's not an FML. cool sounds = MLIA.

number1dukie 0

Friday 9 April 2010 4:20

that happened to me once. just exchange it

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Animals Dogs Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, I’ve been getting a lot of strange messages from guys on the dating site I use, then I realised why: on my profile pic I'm sat down and you can see my nice underwear up my skirt. That explains the messages, they thought I was trolling for men to hump and dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 979

Today, I woke up from a night of serious depression, drinking by myself at home, to find a USB stick wrapped in plastic up my vagina, with "Top secret" written on it. There was nothing on the stick when I checked. I may need to give tequila a rest and switch back to gin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 1 831

The Top

Today, I realized that I'm a terrible human being. For the first time in my life, I gave some change to a homeless guy, but only so he'd get out of my face long enough for me to watch two other bums beating the crap out of each other over a sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 456

You deserved it 34 644

Today, I was out walking my dog. After he took a dump, I went to pick it up but my glasses fell right in his poop. I didn’t have tissue, just the plastic bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 994

You deserved it 235

Today, my mom asked me why I barely talk to her anymore. Well, mom, maybe it's because you nicknamed my stepdaughter "Leftovers," and call her that in public, like at family gatherings or school events. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 251

You deserved it 82

Today, as a public defender, my client was actually innocent for once. I intended to utterly destroy the prosecution's case and demonstrate his good character. That plan went straight to hell when he showed up heavily intoxicated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 425

You deserved it 1 585

Today, I was walking through town when I saw a plastic bag on the ground. Trying to be a good citizen, I picked it up, intending on throwing it in the trash. When I looked up, there wasn't a trash can for another hundred feet. So I put it back down. Now I've got a $200 fine to pay for littering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 003

You deserved it 61 049

Today, I rummaged around in the attic, looking for old pictures of me and my family, so I could make a surprise collage. Instead, I found my dad's old journals, talking about how desperately he didn't want a kid, and how he wanted to leave my mother more and more every day that passed since I was born. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 774

You deserved it 4 158

Same thing different taste

Do it on company time

Self-care

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