Work: Today, my coworker thought it would be funny to throw my keys... - FML

By frmitalywithlove - 11/01/2011 04:11 - United States

Today, my coworker thought it would be funny to throw my keys up onto the top shelf in storage. I'm 4'10. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 647

You deserved it 4 061

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Same thing different taste

By fucking teen cunts - 27/01/2013 21:59 - Australia - Chatswood

Today, I was on a ladder at work, fetching some stock from one of the storage shelves. Some teenage kid thought it would be fucking hilarious to grab the ladder and violently shake it. He hadn't bet on me being startled enough to fall off and fracture my elbow on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 109

You deserved it 2 518

By Anonymous - 30/09/2010 02:57 - United States

Today, I started a new job. I lost my work keys and had everyone running all over the building looking for them. We found them, hanging in the last lock I had used. They now all think I'm a nut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 578

You deserved it 26 251

By Baikal - 12/05/2013 04:09 - Singapore

Today, my cousin thought it would be funny to make copies of my house keys and give it to random people on the street. I live alone and work a 12 hour shift daily. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 020

You deserved it 3 630

No joking allowed

By TecheyTim - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Latham

Today, a coworker and I pulled a April Fools' prank on our boss. She "borrowed" his keys and rolled down his window. I took a car window from a scrap yard and sprinkled it on the ground near his door. His response was to kick the nearest object in anger. The nearest object happened to be my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 529

You deserved it 12 052

By lions214 - 11/01/2012 01:40 - United States

Today, at work at a store, I was sitting on the floor stocking a bottom shelf. A woman in a motorized cart did not see me, and ran over my hand. When I alerted her about what she had done she laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 402

You deserved it 2 936

By Anonymous - 25/08/2019 02:02

Today, some asshat thought it would be funny to put a second lock on my locker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 611

You deserved it 150

By Dumped - 06/04/2017 14:00

Today, at work, I went to place a small item on a shelf. The shelf fell on me, trapping my hand. While lifting it, the top shelf fell against my chest and the products all dumped on my face. I then realized the shelves were only held up by zip ties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 851

You deserved it 364

By mini matthylde - 19/11/2015 09:57 - France - Nantes

Today, I'm 4ft9 "tall" and I always have trouble reaching things that are high up. It's my birthday, and I got three footstools as gifts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 219

You deserved it 3 004

By phansmootchie - 20/12/2011 08:14 - United States

Today, I lost my keys. My roommate locked me out, then yelled at me when I made her come home to let me in. I tore my room apart searching for them, and even went out to search my locker room. When I got home, I glanced at my wall only to find my keys hanging on the hook I set up specifically for them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 309

You deserved it 37 455

It's always in the most obvious place

By Anonymous - 27/02/2023 14:00

Today, my toddler thought it would be funny to hide my car keys. After searching for hours, I found them in his toy box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 733

You deserved it 188

Next

Top comments

SARSvirus79 0

Tuesday 11 January 2011 9:14

So you're fun-sized? :-P Your coworker sounds like a douche.

AKskier1 0

Tuesday 11 January 2011 9:08

in short too. it's all goods

Comments

MLuckyCapoeirist 6

Tuesday 11 January 2011 18:52

I saw a FML a bit too similar on the french counterpart... It went like : "Today, my students who like making fun of my small height, wrote at the top of the blackboard, Erase me if you can"

dt520 4

Tuesday 11 January 2011 19:54

at least short chicks are hot

l0lkitteh 0

Tuesday 11 January 2011 20:05

Hide his keys under your desk. He will not get them out without suffering a discus prolapse ;)

hideyoself 4

Tuesday 11 January 2011 20:22

Im 6'5 :D

HomeAl0ne 20

Tuesday 11 January 2011 20:51

Just get someone to dwarf-toss you up there to get them.

oh_hi_92 1

Tuesday 11 January 2011 22:34

Nobody tosses a dwarf.

ecascio2010 9

Wednesday 12 January 2011 2:07

you should have said " ha, you know what else is funny?" and kicked them in the groin area.

JanisEvans 10

Wednesday 12 January 2011 20:12

Kicking could get tricky... Punching perhaps?

PincheLeti 0

Wednesday 12 January 2011 2:39

Ahh i know how you feel when people do that,put stuff in higher places. Im 4'11

soccerjb7 1

Wednesday 12 January 2011 3:19

4'10"? my brother is 4'10"... and he's an 8 eight year old

123_omg 19

Wednesday 12 January 2011 4:38

i feel your pain. I'm half an inch taller than you. All of my tall friends use my shoulder (or head) as an arm rest.

dirtdude19 0

Wednesday 12 January 2011 6:47

Haha I'm 5'2

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Relatable Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

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Today, I got into an argument with my boyfriend, who recently had to move away, about not calling me enough. Apparently his moving had meant that we were now taking a break, he just forgot to talk it over with me. He still wants to visit, and keep the relationship in bed alive though. FML

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You deserved it 4 364

Stop everything you're doing right now, there's an (almost) naked lady in today's illustration! Plus, there's a puppet AND doctors. It's the perfect illustration, made by Gemma Correll, our British artist of the day. Check out her interview! ...

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Today, after getting an expensive haircut, I showed it to my boyfriend. Instead of saying, "Wow, those bangs look great on you" he said, "Wow, you look really good when you don't show your forehead." FML

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You deserved it 4 742

Today, for the first time since kindergarten, I won! I came first! Yes, I'm first on the waiting list for the M.A. degree I applied to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 078

You deserved it 3 754

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a scary movie. I was starting to get a small headache so he gently brushed my hair. During a scary part he jumped and hit me in the head as hard as he could with the brush. I'm still recovering from the migraine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 654

You deserved it 5 530

Today, I woke up to find out that my phone, which contained all of my pictures and videos from the past year, had completely crashed. Despite trying everything, I couldn't recover any of the data, even from the cloud backup. All those memories, gone forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 618

You deserved it 181

Today, while parked at school, someone broke into my car by smashing the window. I called the police and they informed me I could drive it to the local station as it was an easy 2 minute drive. As I was driving there, I got pulled over for driving with a smashed window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 086

You deserved it 2 602

Today, my building's elevators were temporarily out of service. I climbed up 17 flights of stairs only to realize I left my keys downstairs. After the painful climb back up, the elevator lights came on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 745

You deserved it 6 830