Love: Today, my crush of over a year came over for me to take her on...

FML for mobile
Free

By JK2010 - 11/01/2010 18:12 - Israel

Today, my crush of over a year came over for me to take her on our first date. Today was also the day my drunk parents decided to dance the chicken dance in our front yard, naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 431

You deserved it 3 238

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By schooyou101 - 17/11/2012 13:34 - United States - Prairie Village

Today, my crush finally agreed to spend the night with me. I told my parents to act normal for one night. Apparently, "normal" is strutting around naked and acting like a chicken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 125

You deserved it 6 144

Sibling rivalry

By Anonymous - 14/07/2023 00:02 - Switzerland - Zollikerberg

Today, I finally had an opportunity to flirt with the guy I have a crush on. We danced together all night and everything was going well… too well apparently, because out of nowhere, he kissed my sister, who knew about my crush on him but still kissed him back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 775

You deserved it 149

By O0hdear - 27/08/2015 17:44 - United States - Humble

Today, I went to my fiance's cousin's wedding with him. I got drunk and danced like a stripper in front of his entire extended family, who I'd just met that day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 552

You deserved it 32 633

Sitcom moment

By Anonymous - 24/01/2024 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my crush invited me to her house and I ended up meeting her dad. Then she suddenly had to dash off because her boyfriend, whom I had no idea existed, unexpectedly had free time so they were going on a last minute date, which left me awkwardly sat there in the kitchen with her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 601

You deserved it 114

By maddiee. - 21/10/2010 15:20 - Indonesia

Today, I was on Skype with a guy I really like, in the living room. My dad saw that I was on video chat, got undressed, right down to his bright green y-fronts, and then started dancing behind me. My crush saw it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 302

You deserved it 7 336

By vanorav - 18/03/2012 02:41 - United States - Santa Clarita

Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 583

You deserved it 2 252

By Illinoisgirl - 14/02/2012 14:29 - Hungary

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 252

You deserved it 3 053

By SCREWED - 15/07/2011 06:25 - United States

Today, I came home to my mom dancing the hustle naked. With a group of 4 friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 894

You deserved it 3 905

By Anonymous - 09/11/2015 00:18 - Netherlands

Today, after months of Tinder-ing, first dates and being rejected, I finally was able to hook up with a girl. We met, we kissed, we danced and I took her back to my place. She then promptly tried to make out with my roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 260

You deserved it 3 183

Karaoke Dinner Disaster

By Jonathan Park - 05/03/2020 09:06 - Canada - Richmond Hill

Today, I went on a first date. She got plastered within the first hour, then a song came on in the restaurant and she told me, "This song's about meeeeee." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 451

You deserved it 178

neko_ceko 3

Monday 11 January 2010 23:11

Your parents are epic.

Ninjaface 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 0:54

I hope... *puts on sunglasses* That your crush didn't chicken out on you YYYEEEAAAAAAHHHH!!!

Comments

venomlash 9

Tuesday 12 January 2010 0:15

That's so Israeli! I don't think any of my relatives there have done that sort of thing, but I could be wrong.

TrollTrollTroll 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 0:16

I Fmylife.com naked, So what? I NOW HAVE A TWITTER TWITTER.COM/TROLLTROLLTROLL

ily1210 10

Tuesday 12 January 2010 0:27

that is hilarious omfg ur parents are amazing but FYL id b so embaressed

AdriAmir1314 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 0:27

dats nasty as hell I bet now u must be scarred for life?

ilovedominicx3 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 0:30

wow. ew.

ndiesal 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 0:44

What the ****?

ensemble_coeur 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 1:04

my thoughts exactly

peanut46 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 0:49

Haha. I find that veryy hilarious!(: Shows right off the bat that your familys not boring(:

Ninjaface 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 0:54

I hope... *puts on sunglasses* That your crush didn't chicken out on you YYYEEEAAAAAAHHHH!!!

newsgit 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 1:50

epic

allen20 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 0:59

lets ask Alexandra..hey #5 :D

iaaan 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 1:03

#37 wins

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Weddings Love Parents Religion Stalker Cheating Health Mental health Exhausted Technology Geek School Education Friends Narcissist Awkward Sports Miscellaneous Annoying Intimacy Sex Embarrassing Coworkers Work Kids Parenting Cute Weird Babysitter Healthy Lifestyle

The Top

Today, at the store, I heard a kid complaining about getting braces. While I was saying "Thank you" and "Bye" to the cashier, his grandma must've seen my slightly crooked teeth. She pointed and said, "Without them, your teeth will look bad like that man's!" Everyone around looked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 695

You deserved it 4 584

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 564

You deserved it 70

The Top

Today, someone at work took my delicate medication out of the fridge to make room for their lunch. Now my medication has expired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 743

You deserved it 2 890

Today, my 13-year-old sister told me that she wants to get pregnant soon to stop her periods for a while. I can't believe we're related. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 728

You deserved it 2 856

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 153

You deserved it 6 259

Today, everyone at school told me to wish my brother a happy birthday. We're twins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 952

You deserved it 104

Today, I woke up with an extremely irritable rash around my crotch. I didn't want to full out itch it by putting my hands down my pants, so I itched it by putting my hand in my pockets. I got kicked off the train for "pleasuring myself in public." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 916

You deserved it 5 810

Today, I checked my Ring cameras while at work. Ridiculously, my overweight pug-dog managed to climb up onto the ironing board and seemingly couldn’t get down. I valiantly rushed home to rescue, only for him to immediately jump down unassisted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 158

You deserved it 430

Same thing different taste

Sibling rivalry

Sitcom moment

Karaoke Dinner Disaster

Top comments

Comments