Miscellaneous: Today, my dad and I got into a fight over who gets the last...

By alliez108 - 18/11/2011 00:50 - United States

Today, my dad and I got into a fight over who gets the last corner piece of the brownies. I ended up with a black eye and and a sprained wrist. He ended up with the brownie and ran away laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 905

You deserved it 7 745

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

By ZeroApostle4Ever - 23/02/2012 08:00 - United States

Today, my dad threw a waffle at my face for his own amusement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 077

You deserved it 6 604

By Yoooooo0 - 29/11/2009 18:10 - United States

Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 072

You deserved it 3 724

By ahuman - 29/09/2013 05:10 - United States

Today, I saw two kids having a fistfight in the street. I ran over to stop them, and one ended up hitting me in the eye. I now have a black eye over what turned out to have been a fight over who was going to get the last slice of pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 765

You deserved it 9 771

Placebo

By mother teresa was a cunt - 17/09/2015 14:54 - United States - Cleveland

Today, I baked some brownies and after my mom ate one, I joked that I put weed in them. Turns out the placebo effect's a bitch, because she quickly started acting high as a kite. One bitch fit later, the brownies are in the trash and I'm grounded until I tell her where I bought the "weed". FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 524

You deserved it 5 459

By Anonymous - 03/04/2011 15:14 - United States

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 740

You deserved it 6 423

Fun for all the family

By Anonymous - 14/04/2021 02:00

Today, my mom and dad got into a fight, during which my dad said to my mom that her health conditions were of her own doing. Because of that, I got pissed and had a fight with my dad, taking my mom's side. Turns out, my mom took his side and ratted me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 769

You deserved it 282

By Jaws - 10/02/2011 16:09 - France

Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 775

You deserved it 38 591

Reviews

By Anonymous - 14/07/2010 06:14 - United States

Today, I made brownies for my co-workers. My boss called me into his office, and I though he was going to compliment me on the baking. Instead, he talked about how his 5-year-old daughter can make brownies better than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 689

You deserved it 6 235

Eventful day

By Anonymous - 30/07/2021 23:01 - Bahrain - Manama

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight after the gym. Then, a cheesecake I'd baked for a client cracked all the way through. Then, my oven broke as I was trying to make a new one, so I left to bake it at a friend's house, at which point I locked my keys and all of my supplies inside my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 092

You deserved it 140

By Anonymous - 30/08/2010 10:34 - Oman

Today, I injured my knee and dislocated my shoulder fighting over a cookie with my brother. He's 14. I'm 26. He still got the cookie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 384

You deserved it 37 305

DanbotXIII 10

Friday 18 November 2011 9:19

You must train harder to snatch pebble from palm, grasshopper.

Freeze_fml 16

Friday 18 November 2011 9:18

Food chain in effect.

Comments

duckie1015 9

Friday 18 November 2011 12:58

My family and I fight NOT to get the corner pieces soooo you're perfectly welcome to just take all of ours. Problem solved :)

kemando 22

Friday 18 November 2011 13:01

Buy the edge brownie pan from Vat19 all pieces are edge pieces!! :D

Rachel1987 4

Friday 18 November 2011 13:16

Are there limited brownies in your trailer park? I can't think of a good reason to physically fight over a brownie. Unless your family is just THAT fat and needs to sustain their "shape."

MeMareeh 0

Friday 18 November 2011 14:03

72 Brownies know no boundries! Not even trailer parks. Nor are they devoured by only the fat. And corner brownies??? MMM THE BEST !!!

Saddyohh 13

Friday 18 November 2011 13:27

So make the Brownies in a pie dish. Genius!

emodude44 0

Friday 18 November 2011 13:38

Preciouuussss... Juicy meat, is good to eat, its nice and sweeeet.... Stupid fat hobbitses... They take my PRECIOUS! We wants the brownie yes we does! We wants it! The brownie IS MY PRECIOUS!

sabb1228 0

Friday 18 November 2011 13:54

I'd go up to him, yell **** you, and drill him as hard as you can.

enopola 5

Friday 18 November 2011 15:53

Yeah, then at least you look hard for that spilt second before you take the back of the pimp hand across the face to the ground.

chquitaMa 0

Friday 18 November 2011 14:12

Can't mess around when it come to browines ! ;D

shelby_sevenfold 0

Friday 18 November 2011 14:32

You do realize you can turn him in... Fyl.

gthum 10

Friday 18 November 2011 14:37

Dysfunctional family you got there.

perdix 29

Friday 18 November 2011 14:46

When I grew up, you never ate the last of anything, that was for Dad. How could you be so disrespectful? If you want to be the alpha male, get a job and start your own family. Just make sure you marry a woman who bakes like a BAWS! BTW, back in biblical times, striking a parent was a death-penalty crime. You're just out a corner brownie.