Miscellaneous: Today, my dad started his mid-life crisis. Instead of a Porsche... - FML

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 10:22 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad started his mid-life crisis. Instead of a Porsche or a Ferrari, he bought a tractor. Goodbye summer holiday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 712

You deserved it 2 423

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Same thing different taste

Growing old disgracefully

By adam - 05/12/2015 14:54 - Czech Republic

Today, my dad is having his midlife crisis, bought a Mercedes, along with having a girlfriend less than half his age. I was trying to be supportive, until I found out he is funding his midlife crisis with my university loan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 270

You deserved it 1 561

By What. - 14/08/2013 00:08 - United States - Pawtucket

Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 071

You deserved it 3 569

By phonemenace - 17/08/2011 09:50 - United States

Today, I counted the amount of stuff that my dad had bought within a week: a brand new boat, car, and truck. He also has countless gadgets at his office, including a 60" television. Our house is literally falling apart but Mr. Midlife-crisis won't do anything to help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 795

You deserved it 2 827

By ugh - 04/07/2016 17:26 - United States - Milford

Today, my dad had a midlife crisis in the grocery store over his football career in high school. So he decided pelting me with vegetables and fruits would be a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 442

You deserved it 1 120

Public menace

By Anonymous - 06/01/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom - Portsmouth

Today, my dad is too old to drive, period, and yet while I was at work my wife thought it was a good idea to let him try her new Mercedes, which by the way I bought and insured. He used the accelerator like he was driving a shitbox Nissan and destroyed our local kebab shop's big front window and door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 143

By Colin Jr. - 23/09/2015 13:24 - United States

Today, it's the third week of my dad's midlife crisis. So far he's blown half my college fund pimping out his piece of shit car, keeps texting me meme pictures, and keeps yelling "Savage!" and "Recked!" any time my mom makes a joke at anyone's expense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 797

You deserved it 1 699

Midlife crisis in style

By Anonymous - 15/03/2022 14:00

Today, my husband started his midlife crisis with a bang, or rather several bangs, as he admitted that there are two women out there pregnant with his babies. Oh, and he quit his job to escape the daily grind. Oh, and he remortgaged the house to buy a truck so we could go cross country. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 468

You deserved it 109

Mid-life crisis

By theslutmuncher - 14/12/2012 23:20 - Germany - Merseburg

Today, in the midst of his ongoing mid-life crisis, my dad forced me to accompany him for some father-son bonding. The bonding involved me driving us away at high speed after he gleefully hurled a bucket of paint all over a store window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 918

You deserved it 2 488

By Anonymous - 26/12/2009 03:13 - United States

Today, my father went out to get batteries for the remote control helicopter I bought him for Christmas. In his excitement, he backed his truck into my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 119

You deserved it 2 923

Get in, kid

By -__- - 28/10/2011 11:50 - Australia

Today, I think my dad has finally lost his shit and is having a mid-life crisis. He showed up at my school and had me brought to the front desk. He told me to get in the car because we were going to have some "father-daughter bonding". This meant us watching Silent Hill with his work buddies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 208

You deserved it 2 595

Next

Top comments

tony1891 22

Thursday 31 May 2012 15:45

a tractor? doesn't sound like mid life crisis to me. sounds like he's starting a farm. all you need now is some animals.

stevenmx86 7

Thursday 31 May 2012 15:43

I don't understand why this is so bad? So it's not a bad ass car.. Tractors hold value better anyway.

Comments

shadownexus1 5

Friday 1 June 2012 20:20

Lamborghini used to make tractors ;)

crazy1999 1

Saturday 2 June 2012 9:09

That sounds awesome what are you talkin about fml

kmsdvm24 11

Saturday 2 June 2012 18:04

While I sympathize for your lost summer vacation, I don't know if that necessarily qualifies as a full-blown mid-life crisis...

vidieh 3

Monday 4 June 2012 10:26

My dad did this too. We live in a small quiet place and he has no were to ride it

delilah1997 0

Tuesday 5 June 2012 6:39

Oh boohoo I haven't had a real summer break in almost a decade because my dad is a hardcore farmer. We grow wheat. Guess when harvest is? Summer! So suck it up.

huntercallender 0

Tuesday 5 June 2012 21:55

Everyone in my family owns at least one tractor. What is wrong with that?

EmmyGirl1426 0

Sunday 15 July 2012 20:56

That doesnt really bother me cause i was kinda born and rasied on the farm!

kikkilinu 3

Sunday 4 November 2012 14:59

Lamborghini used to make tractors. Did he get one of those?

mackischillin 5

Saturday 12 January 2013 2:26

First world problems

droptableusers 7

Tuesday 30 April 2013 17:42

They see him rollin', they hatin'.

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The Top

Today, after finally getting up the confidence, I started talking really dirty to my boyfriend on the phone. I was getting really onto it, and he seemed to enjoy it too. Then I stopped for a second to gauge his reaction. He was snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 873

You deserved it 4 683

Today, I pulled my Christmas tree out of my mother-in-law's garage, only to find out rats had ruined all the lights. The tree cost $2600. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 523

The Top

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend of six years with another girl. He tried to apologize, stating that it was because I "look too much like a man". FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 208

You deserved it 461

Today, I overheard my soon to be step-daughter telling her friend on the phone that she hopes that mine and her father's wedding is just a big joke, and that he isn't really going to go through with it. I just dropped five grand on a dress and venue. She's in for a surprise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 068

You deserved it 3 119

Today, while in class, a cute boy came up and asked me for my number. I giggled and wrote my phone number on a piece of paper and told him to call me sometime. He gave me a weird look and walked away. He was asking which number math problem I needed help with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 536

You deserved it 35 000

Today, I avoided having to wash the dishes by faking a cold. My sucker of a wife believed me and hopped off my balls about it. Later on, after I made a miraculous recovery, she told me to take out the trash. It's freezing outside and raining, and I feel a very real cold coming on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 975

You deserved it 79 369

Today, I chuckled at a "No Smoking" sign as I lit my cigarette. I bent my head down to light it and somehow managed to light my hair on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 770

You deserved it 71 619

Today, my dad made the New Year’s resolution that he’d try to get on better with my boyfriend. We’re less than 24 hours into the 1st of January and he’s already chased him around the garden trying to brain him with a meat tenderiser. Business as usual then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 485

You deserved it 156