why shouldn't you go half? or even pay yourself? it's your finger the ring's going to be sitting on.

LMAO @ mcmurdy. Omg that is so funny AND true!

At least YOU got HALFSIES!!!!! I bought my ring outright...

in these tough economic times... I'd say the same thing

Asking to pay up on an engagement ring is in poor taste. Either buy a cheaper ring he can afford, or if he wants to suprise her with a fancy ring, wait a little longer till he can buy one. There are alot of nice engraved bands he could get that are not too expensive. Then buy a diamond later when he can afford.

Just go shopping for it together so you can find something you like yet still work out a budget. Its his job to buy the ring though..

I have been married 10 years and just recently my hubby bought me a beautiful ring. I wore the wedding band until he suprised me with a custom diamond and sapphire ring. We are better off financially now vs 10 yrs ago, so buying an expensive ring did not bust the bank acct. OP, maybe just have a band for now and pick out the ring you want later when you guys get more money?

Unload him. Yes, everything is halfsies once you're hitched, but if homey can't show full commitment to asking your hand, what else will he justify compromise? Besides, if $ is the issue, get you a smaller ring or propose that one day for your 10th anniversary you get The Big Rock etc. There were so many other ways to play this.

I understand it may have ruined the moment and that he could get a cheaper ring to avoid askin' to go halfsies but the OP sounds like she might not accept a cheaper ring and like she may have had a certain ring in mind. He was tryin' to do the right thing. Expectin' people to pay 'cause of tradition is dumb, not everyone has the money or the family to do so. If things were bad I could see myself doin' this or gettin' her a cheaper ring then I wanted too. I could also see myself payin' for my wedding or splittin', traditionally her dads job, 'cause if she's like me I have no family and those would be the only options.

That's pretty crappy that he asked you without the ring and without discussing the financial situation first. My husband wanted my proposal to be a surprise, but when I found out it was coming, we discussed options since finances were really tight. we agreed (since our finances were already combined and there was no his money/my money anyway) that we would put a CZ in the ring until we could afford to replace it with a real diamond. I have to admit that a proposal without a ring may have bummed me out a bit. But the person who said the wedding is paid for by the bride's family also makes a valid point. Maybe a cZ or a white sapphire would be an option for him. just remember that once you're married, it's your money as much as his, unless he makes significantly more than you. I don't think this is a FML, but it is a bummer. if you're truly ready for marriage, then you can have an adult conversation about it.