Miscellaneous: Today, my friends were being rude to me, so I decided to be nice...

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By lalanon - 03/04/2009 05:16 - Australia

Today, my friends were being rude to me, so I decided to be nice to a boy that didn't have many friends. While I was talking to him he popped a pimple on his face and tasted it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 186 988

You deserved it 33 468

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/10/2015 13:45 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I was talking with some friends and the girl I like. During a lull in the conversation, she looked at me and said, "Ugh, I really wanna pop your zits." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 742

You deserved it 3 433

By WTTFFFF - 09/05/2014 17:24 - United States - Tecumseh

Today, the creepy kid who sits behind me in English class decided that sniffing my hair wasn't disturbing enough for his liking, so he tried something new: popping one of the pimples on my neck. When I reacted in horror, all he could say was, "It looked pretty..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 843

You deserved it 4 755

Smooth

By eayers2689 - 30/05/2009 16:19 - United States

Today, I went to a barbecue and noticed a girl that I had be interested in. When I walked up to ask how she was doing I noticed she had some BBQ sauce on her face. Jokingly I licked my thumb and reach to remove it. It turned out to be a scab from a pimple she had popped earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 624

You deserved it 59 168

By DopeDickDover - 26/10/2015 15:50 - United States

Today, at school, a cute girl kept glancing up at me, giggling, and looking away as soon as I looked at her. So naturally I walked up to her and asked if she wanted to go out sometime. She said she didn't like me, she was just laughing at how big a zit was on my forehead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 383

You deserved it 2 579

By Anonymous - 22/02/2014 02:47 - United States - Irvine

Today, I was at the mall with a couple of friends when we saw a couple of cute boys. I made eye contact with the cutest one. Flustered, I giggled, only to send a wad of snot flying out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 912

You deserved it 8 255

By Qwerty - 28/06/2011 16:10 - Australia

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 007

You deserved it 5 288

First Dates

By sillvy - 13/01/2012 09:32 - United States

Today, I was on a date. I noticed he kept looking at my lips. Thinking he wanted to kiss me, I leaned in closer. Disgusted, he pulled away and said, "I'm sorry, but that pimple on your chin is, like, staring at me or something." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 153

You deserved it 5 571

It's the thought that counts

By no good deed - 23/07/2020 20:02

Today, I was feeling pretty down due to a recent back injury, so I thought I’d do something nice to help lift my spirits. I bought some cookies for my coworkers, who ended up not wanting any, and one of them decided to ask what was wrong with my face. Oh, right, my acne rosacea is flaring too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 497

You deserved it 264

By Anonymous - 30/06/2011 17:30 - United States

Today, I woke up to find that not only did the toothpaste I put on my pimple make it more noticable, but it made it worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 456

You deserved it 34 660

By Pimpleeater - 20/12/2011 07:45 - New Zealand

Today, I found out that, when mad at us, my son picks the tops off his shoulder-pimples and sprinkles them in our food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 476

You deserved it 5 680

Spider_fml 9

Friday 3 April 2009 16:03

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Samilla 0

Friday 3 April 2009 16:05

That is what you get from being nice :p Did you taste it ?? I guess you now know why he doesn't have that many friends

Comments

Epic_Fail_Sauce 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 2:42

*GAGS*

choppedNskrewed 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 2:44

ohmygosh one of the most disgusting things ever. this made me naseous

jules96_fml 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 3:09

hahahhaha ewwww

RPGod 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 3:16

THIS IS WHY HE DOESN'T HAVE FRIENDS!

sliimxshady 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 3:18

Yuk.

FMLfangirl89 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 3:45

that is THE MOST disgusting thing I HAVE EVER heard in my WHOLE LIFE! bleh!!!!! I agree with #165, this is EXACTLY WHY he has NO friends! EW

FMLfangirl89 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 3:47

#131 there is nothing wrong with being gay. Gay is OK!!

mastershake 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 3:52

WHHAATTT???!!! thats DISGUSTING what a ****** weirdo! who does that!?

fmlADDICTED 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 3:59

HHAHAHHAHAH! oh god, damn, okay yah im lyke crying now. hahahahahah. jjeeeeze. dksljlgas.

iEuphorical 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 4:15

THAT'S ******* DISGUSTING. Lol at #7. But still, gross!

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The Top

Today, my mother followed me to work to see what I got up to. I'm a fitness instructor in a ground floor gym that has big windows overlooking the street. She stood outside and waved at me for half an hour, while I tried to concentrate on teaching a visibly amused class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 800

You deserved it 2 400

Today, I got home and noticed people were looking at my next-door neighbor's house that's for rent. Peering closer, I realized my ex-boyfriend and the girl he cheated on me with a few months ago were inside. After they left, the "For Rent" sign came down. I've got new neighbors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 175

You deserved it 3 270

The Top

Today, this beautiful girl that I've known for a long time told me that she just can't date me anymore because I remind her too much of her cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 430

You deserved it 1 914

Today, my abusive mom just moved into my house, within two weeks of me losing my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 141

Today, in his will, my dad laid the blame squarely at my feet for his depression, alcoholism, liver failure, suicide attempt and eventual death, not because of anything I did, just for being born in the first place. He never wanted a kid, resented becoming a dad and drank to make the depression bearable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 991

You deserved it 130

Today, I gave my boss two weeks notice for me leaving work, as I had received a better job offer with twice the pay. I thought he took it well until I heard him mutter under his breath, "About fucking time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 321

You deserved it 1 635

Today, the guy I like shared a repost on his Instagram story that said, “No message is a message. Take the hint and move on.” He’d left my last message to him on “Seen” for 4 days now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 348

Today, due to intense deforestation, my wife Jane and I have to take several transfer vines to get to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 42

Same thing different taste

Smooth

First Dates

It's the thought that counts

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