Miscellaneous: Today, my friends were being rude to me, so I decided to be nice...

By lalanon - 03/04/2009 05:16 - Australia

Today, my friends were being rude to me, so I decided to be nice to a boy that didn't have many friends. While I was talking to him he popped a pimple on his face and tasted it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 186 965

You deserved it 33 464

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/10/2015 13:45 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I was talking with some friends and the girl I like. During a lull in the conversation, she looked at me and said, "Ugh, I really wanna pop your zits." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 736

You deserved it 3 431

By WTTFFFF - 09/05/2014 17:24 - United States - Tecumseh

Today, the creepy kid who sits behind me in English class decided that sniffing my hair wasn't disturbing enough for his liking, so he tried something new: popping one of the pimples on my neck. When I reacted in horror, all he could say was, "It looked pretty..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 835

You deserved it 4 753

Smooth

By eayers2689 - 30/05/2009 16:19 - United States

Today, I went to a barbecue and noticed a girl that I had be interested in. When I walked up to ask how she was doing I noticed she had some BBQ sauce on her face. Jokingly I licked my thumb and reach to remove it. It turned out to be a scab from a pimple she had popped earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 621

You deserved it 59 156

By DopeDickDover - 26/10/2015 15:50 - United States

Today, at school, a cute girl kept glancing up at me, giggling, and looking away as soon as I looked at her. So naturally I walked up to her and asked if she wanted to go out sometime. She said she didn't like me, she was just laughing at how big a zit was on my forehead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 379

You deserved it 2 576

By Anonymous - 22/02/2014 02:47 - United States - Irvine

Today, I was at the mall with a couple of friends when we saw a couple of cute boys. I made eye contact with the cutest one. Flustered, I giggled, only to send a wad of snot flying out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 903

You deserved it 8 248

By Qwerty - 28/06/2011 16:10 - Australia

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 993

You deserved it 5 285

First Dates

By sillvy - 13/01/2012 09:32 - United States

Today, I was on a date. I noticed he kept looking at my lips. Thinking he wanted to kiss me, I leaned in closer. Disgusted, he pulled away and said, "I'm sorry, but that pimple on your chin is, like, staring at me or something." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 145

You deserved it 5 569

It's the thought that counts

By no good deed - 23/07/2020 20:02

Today, I was feeling pretty down due to a recent back injury, so I thought I’d do something nice to help lift my spirits. I bought some cookies for my coworkers, who ended up not wanting any, and one of them decided to ask what was wrong with my face. Oh, right, my acne rosacea is flaring too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 262

By Anonymous - 30/06/2011 17:30 - United States

Today, I woke up to find that not only did the toothpaste I put on my pimple make it more noticable, but it made it worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 453

You deserved it 34 650

By Pimpleeater - 20/12/2011 07:45 - New Zealand

Today, I found out that, when mad at us, my son picks the tops off his shoulder-pimples and sprinkles them in our food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 464

You deserved it 5 679

Spider_fml 9

Friday 3 April 2009 16:03

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Samilla 0

Friday 3 April 2009 16:05

That is what you get from being nice :p Did you taste it ?? I guess you now know why he doesn't have that many friends

Comments

cherrigrl22 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:37

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww that is soooo grooooooooossssssssssss! maybe hes slow? lol

jbcr14 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:38

omg that is the grossest thing i've ever heard... congrats haha

McLaughlane 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:41

I think I just threw up a little in my mouth. eeew.

sleepless15_p 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:44

Now you know why he has few friends. That is so disgusting.

chocolatecookies 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:44

OMG EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

fcuk_fml 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:46

there is NO WAY!!!! that this story is true! its so ******* DISGUSTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

fmworld_ 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:51

Um, I think..uh.. Yep. I did just throw up a little bit. =]

Maximus16 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 1:07

Jaja!!! i bet you he was jus messn wit u cuz u nevr talk to him before! lmao he's funny, but thts pretty gross

sydney9_fml 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 1:07

There are no words to describe the nastiness in this FML...

Jennifer83 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 1:14

Oh My God! I would have thrown up all over that pizza face!

Keywords

Family Miscellaneous DIY Cats Awkward Management Poopoo peepee Work Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration Dogs Animals ADHD Transportation Dating Love Health Anxiety Technology Mental health Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy Confused AITA Parents

The Top

Today, my dad is freaking out because he thinks he's next on the list of targets the NYC CEO shooter has. Not because he himself is a healthcare-ruining CEO, but he's a pharmacist who gets death threats every week from patients he can't give medication to, due to insurance companies denying everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 71

Today, my parents were helping me construct my bed. We ended up not having enough screws to properly secure the frame. My dad mentioned that it might cause problems if I got a girl into my bed. My mom said, "Don't worry about it, we all know that's not going to happen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 596

You deserved it 9 209

The Top

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I had bad stomach cramps so I asked if I could use the bathroom. After half an hour, I flushed the toilet, it backs up and floods the bathroom. To make things worse, when I opened the door, I slipped on the wet tiles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 886

You deserved it 2 907

Today, no matter how much I begged, my friend who'd locked himself away with my iPhone wouldn't stop taking pics of his penis and forwarding them to my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 014

You deserved it 5 484

Today, my significant other woke at 4:30 a.m. to me crying about a spider in the bathroom. I have an intense fear of spiders; he was super nice and took care of it for me. He even walked me out to my car. I started to calm down driving to work, but when I got there what do I see on the door handle but a spider. I'm still shaking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 940

You deserved it 449

Today, I was making my bed and had an armload of pillows. One slipped and I tried to catch it between my arm and leg. I missed, sending my fist into my nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 744

You deserved it 260

Today, after I finally got the money for a pool, I built a deck, filled it a quarter of the way, then all the 4x4 beams collapsed. The pool ripped in half, flooding the yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 288

You deserved it 879

Today, I'm a generalist with moderate knowledge of multiple domains, but since I'm not a specialist in any, I'm not getting a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 791

You deserved it 227

Same thing different taste

Smooth

First Dates

It's the thought that counts

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