Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate and planning...

By Ouch - 25/04/2011 19:31 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate and planning on having sex for the first time. I picked her up off the couch, and in so doing, accidentally lifted her too high, putting her head through the ceiling. She had a mild concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 750

You deserved it 20 695

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Same thing different taste

By dontpanic - 21/09/2009 19:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was getting up to leave and I, trying to be romantic, got up behind her and tried to swing her back down onto the bed and kiss her simultaneously, misjudged the distance and threw her into the wall, her head then bounced off the wall and into my forehead, spraining her nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 498

You deserved it 26 969

It's just a flesh wound!

By manhandled - 01/02/2012 18:05 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 163

You deserved it 4 026

By douglisk1994 - 10/02/2009 00:07 - United States

Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11 to her garage where we start to have sex. When she comes to climax she slips and hits her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down, we were both still naked and she was unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 206

You deserved it 20 251

Performance

By bob - 29/06/2012 08:47 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, I learned that I do not possess the upper body, core, or leg strength to hold my girlfriend up during sex. I simultaneously collapsed and dropped her onto her coffee table. We are now both being treated at the hospital; her for glass wounds, me for a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 356

You deserved it 31 586

Steamy

By Hotdamn - 21/03/2016 04:32 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and steamy in the shower, until I slipped and fell backwards into the shower curtain, which caused me to hit the back of my head on the toilet seat, and the bar of the shower curtain to land on my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 288

You deserved it 3 185

Cramped

By chelse_elyce - 21/01/2015 04:10 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top. My ass hit the horn and scared my boyfriend so bad, he jumped, causing me to hit my head so hard that I swear I got a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 835

You deserved it 13 367

By Anonymous - 25/07/2015 04:20 - United States - Tempe

Today, after vacuuming, I struggled to pull the nozzle attachment out. I yanked it too hard and it flew out, hitting me in the face and causing my head to jerk back into the wall behind me. My girlfriend had to drive me to the hospital for my concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 300

You deserved it 3 307

Life imitates bad art

By sex sent me to the Er - 15/10/2019 14:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 838

You deserved it 2 143

By Anonymous - 08/05/2015 16:46 - United Kingdom - Loughton

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I sneezed so hard that my head shot forward and smashed against his, sending his head backwards against the wall. He ended up with a concussion, and I still feel like someone hit me over the head with a chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 823

You deserved it 3 843

By Anonymous - 11/01/2018 19:00

Today, I fell asleep on the couch and my boyfriend thought it would be cute to carry me to bed. He knocked my head on the door frame and I pretended it didn't hurt because he felt so bad, but I shouldn't have. I was rushed to the hospital hours later with a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 930

You deserved it 675

giantsfan2010 23

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:30

Into the ceiling? Are you superman?

bravesfan112233 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 1:54

FINISH HER!!!

Comments

Keyman1212 14

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:41

Well, you gave it to her rough... Just not the way you expected it to be.

remy3106 10

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:59

hahaha funny. :)

t3hpwnz4rz 4

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:41

More like a fhl I mean u still got laid. Unconscious still counts as getting laid right?

UmbraeCatervae 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:46

why yes, yes it does

flickyourbic1223 7

Tuesday 26 April 2011 2:28

Dammit! I thought all those vodka blackouts wouldn't count. And here I thouht I was still a virgin. pssssh

gardianlh24 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:42

Wrong way! Try again!

kendallraee3 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:44

That's so funnny.

MsSoulReaper 27

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:45

It's a sign! Or some shit like that. Don't have sex..yet.

katierocks 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:45

wow I wounder what she said was it "ok babe let's not have sex in till we are old and can't lift each other" lol

MandaMazing 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 5:58

youu spelled wonder wrong.

dirtyblond 4

Tuesday 26 April 2011 9:27

You spelled "you" wrong. (:

annasakki 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 11:55

haha

katierocks 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:45

wow I wounder what she said was it "ok babe let's not have sex in till we are old and can't lift each other" lol

idklalaalala 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:46

concussions don't stop me

jodie85 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 7:07

Concussions are kinky!

kinkajoujennie 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:46

How did her head hit the ceiling, what is it a trailer? That's crazy!!!

SirreAibohRose 0

Sunday 22 May 2011 4:15

#35, you honestly think they have trailers in Canada? Get owned.

doom2 8

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:46

sounds to me like someone either has some serious strength or the ceilings were just a little too low.

flickyourbic1223 7

Tuesday 26 April 2011 2:31

What happened to doom1? Is she ok?

Keywords

Awkward Embarrassing Miscellaneous Sleep Work Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Teenagers Dogs Animals Video games Gamers Ironic Zoom

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 8 096

You deserved it 880

Today, my husband decided to flash me while I was on a video call, so my clients announced they would only work with professionals, and ended the call. I was giving a virtual showing of a £1.2 million house they were thinking of buying. At 6% commission, my husband's junk just cost us £72,000. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 406

You deserved it 276

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 770

You deserved it 492

Today, my 3-year-old son put into practice the lesson I taught him yesterday, about how to use a larger piece of Play-Doh to pick up smaller bits. Unfortunately, he used this method to pick up a small bit of poo from his pants with a larger bit of poo direct from the toilet. I was an hour late for work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 077

You deserved it 492

Today, when drunk, I became OCD about everything and spent 3 hours making sure that the books on my shelves were straight. I thought that being drunk was supposed to be fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 009

You deserved it 9 917

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I agree, your life sucks 834

You deserved it 150

Today, I added "a road sign" to my ever-growing list of "Things which have hit my car as a result of the wind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 560

You deserved it 3 165

Today, I decided I wanted to bleach my hair, so I asked my mother for help. Apparently, something went wrong, because clumps of my hair started falling out. Now I'm half blonde and half bald, and my mom is just laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 338

You deserved it 6 694

Same thing different taste

It's just a flesh wound!

Performance

Steamy

Cramped

Life imitates bad art

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