Love: Today, my girlfriend dumped me for no real reason via text message....

By tkghan - 02/08/2013 14:53 - United States - Concord

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for no real reason via text message. A few hours later, she updated her relationship status on Facebook to "in a relationship." Her new "boyfriend"? Her cat. A mutual friend commented, "Well, he's better than that idiot you had before." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 460

You deserved it 6 170

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/12/2018 07:30 - United States - Rockville Centre

Today, my girlfriend of 3 months broke up with me via text and said she was keeping the cat. I've had the cat since for seven years since she was a kitten. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 366

You deserved it 233

By mollyeyers - 22/08/2010 17:02 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. According to his Facebook, he had a new girlfriend 16 seconds later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 921

You deserved it 3 521

By Afroman720 - 27/07/2015 18:55 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 775

You deserved it 2 890

It's for the best

By yesguysgetabusedtoo - 24/05/2013 23:42 - New Zealand - Papamoa

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 618

You deserved it 6 950

By schwange - 15/05/2010 17:07 - United States

Today, my girlfriend left me for my best friend. Over a text message with "lol" in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 985

You deserved it 3 889

Easy fix

By failure - 13/10/2010 06:18 - Australia

Today, I rang my girlfriend to make sure she made it home alright. She told me to check my Facebook. Nothing was different so I hit refresh. We were no longer in a relationship. I got dumped via Facebook whilst on the phone to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 428

You deserved it 3 107

By grantsidiots - 27/11/2013 05:51 - Australia

Today, my fiancée broke up with me over text message while I was away for work. She later posted photos of her and her new boyfriend on Facebook, while still wearing my engagement ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 843

You deserved it 3 157

By WTF - 12/09/2013 23:08 - United States - Plainfield

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She later put on Facebook that, "Today was a great day!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 270

You deserved it 4 487

Facebook official means it's serious

By DianneS - 07/07/2022 10:00

Today, I had the displeasure of watching my boyfriend’s Facebook go from “In a relationship” with me to “Single”, then switched to a big “In a relationship with” the girl he told me was “just a friend” post, after ending our 5-year relationship over text message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 130

You deserved it 110

Sick move, bro

By jlw1998 - 25/04/2016 04:36 - United States - Dallas

Today, I bought my girlfriend a cat. I now have a cat and no girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 494

You deserved it 4 510

vballgirly28 16

Friday 2 August 2013 19:11

That's just weird. Seriously a cat? What can you do with a cat....never mind I don't want to know.

helpfulwhale 12

Friday 2 August 2013 19:11

She really let the cat out of the bag on that one, didn't she?

Comments

The_Mr_Troll 14

Friday 2 August 2013 20:06

Yeah I know how you feel about getting dumped for no reason. Well there might have been a reason in my case, but she refused to tell me. FYL, OP.

mete_orito 34

Friday 2 August 2013 20:25

Did you upload any Instagram pictures from Bahamas lately? Just curious. :-P

jman26 11

Friday 2 August 2013 20:28

She dumped you for a pussy!? Sorry to hear OP

illegalbeagle69 23

Friday 2 August 2013 20:30

Of the kennel?

Furytalon 14

Friday 2 August 2013 20:51

I'm sure she was joking, but that mutual "friend" is a dick

cmoney1992 9

Friday 2 August 2013 21:04

That must be a pretty gorgeous cat

anthony99 14

Friday 2 August 2013 21:05

Hermione must've dumped Ron for Crookshanks

masika15 16

Friday 2 August 2013 21:09

Op that's when you update your relationship with dog.

sonnyrosa 32

Friday 2 August 2013 22:34

Better than the bitch he had before

asdfghjkl2cute 11

Friday 2 August 2013 21:46

I guess she likes pussy

Cami111 2

Friday 2 August 2013 22:13

Sleep with her best friend nice way to get revenge

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 341

You deserved it 403

Today, I left something in my boss's office. The door was closed which usually means she isn't in there, so I asked her coworker/friend for the key. When I opened the door, she screamed at me to get out of there. Turns out, she has just stopped breastfeeding her son and was pumping her breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 433

You deserved it 21 176

The Top

Today, my wife and I are supposed to be trying for another baby. We've tried once in the last 7 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 178

Today, this might sound silly, but would you like to know what I think is the absolute worst time to get an uncontrollable boner? I'll tell you: While a female doctor is examining your privates. I swear, if there's anything more embarrassing than that, I'd like to know, because I'm still mortified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 627

You deserved it 171

Today, I found out that my parents have always believed that every single time I have ever showed emotion, I was faking it and that I'm actually a sociopath with no feelings. I was kicked out of the theater department at my college for my poor acting skills, and they know it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 134

You deserved it 119

Today, in art class, our instructor called me up to the front to model for a drawing. I agreed to pose because it was nice to be called on, and I needed a self-esteem boost. He then thanked me, saying it's a great exercise for the class to draw such strange proportions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 193

You deserved it 2 501

Today, after evicting my roommate for excessively not abiding by the lease agreements, he thought he could get back at me by sending me a video of my sister giving him head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 736

You deserved it 1 554

Today, at work, I put my earphones in to listen to some music. An hour later, I realised I never pressed play. FML

I agree, your life sucks 751

You deserved it 1 176