Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage...

By devilboy - 06/07/2011 11:26 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 158

You deserved it 18 034

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/04/2015 14:24 - United States - Altamonte Springs

Today, my religious girlfriend convinced me to let her take my virginity. A few hours later, she broke up with me, crying and saying I was going to hell for having sex before marriage. But apparently she isn't, and she can't be with someone who "tempts" her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 289

You deserved it 3 724

Jesus wept

By chicochico - 19/12/2008 16:05 - France

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came, "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 342

You deserved it 7 042

By Anonymous - 15/08/2012 11:40 - United Kingdom - Chatham

Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 385

You deserved it 3 436

By Anonymous - 14/03/2013 16:59 - Germany - Dortmund

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 732

You deserved it 10 557

By Anonymous - 02/01/2012 17:30 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 285

You deserved it 7 891

By doomed - 22/08/2009 17:46 - United States

Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 433

You deserved it 6 700

Like a virgin

By JustSomeGuy - 30/07/2013 03:43 - United States - Bulverde

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 100

You deserved it 9 622

By baron - 01/06/2009 17:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 131 679

You deserved it 7 573

By fuck you, Odin, FUCK YOU - 03/03/2014 22:35 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 323

You deserved it 9 621

By Anonymous - 02/02/2013 14:41 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, after two weeks of not having sex, my pregnant girlfriend and I finally fooled around. This was immediately followed by her bursting into tears and begging me to make her a ham steak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 286

You deserved it 9 933

aprilita 8

Wednesday 6 July 2011 19:01

To console her by making love to her ;)

ParkersGirl 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 19:00

LMAO!

Comments

ash0415 0

Thursday 8 September 2011 6:32

Lmfao

TudorPangal 2

Sunday 25 September 2011 7:46

Dump her in the name of Science!!!

ArcaneEchoXIII 11

Tuesday 4 October 2011 9:41

This is part of why I don't date Christians. Or religious people in general if avoidable.

heralynn1011 0

Friday 4 November 2011 15:52

It was gods wishes right ;) lol

whosurdaddy123 0

Tuesday 29 November 2011 11:29

Tell the bitch to shut up and get her christian ass out of ur house, I break it off with girls as soon as I found out they have a purity ring lol,

NinjaNinja2211 1

Thursday 8 December 2011 3:36

...This is why I'm not religious...

ering17 7

Sunday 22 January 2012 8:29

love conquers all?

anthony99 14

Saturday 8 December 2012 7:42

Congrats, you're dating Tim Tebow's twin sister

lexiebeane 9

Monday 31 December 2012 20:38

Maybe you shouldn't be so damn tempting. Lmao

kawaiisakura 12

Monday 14 January 2013 22:54

I have to say YDI. You should've asked y the change in mind and simply respected the previous wish.

Keywords

Health Money Kids You're fired Christmas Work Bodyshaming Customers Fat Am I overreacting? Love Social Media Facebook AITA Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Education Students Relatable Technology Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends

The Top

Today, I pulled my Christmas tree out of my mother-in-law's garage, only to find out rats had ruined all the lights. The tree cost $2600. FML

I agree, your life sucks 198

You deserved it 527

Today, my mom kicked me out of the house because I missed my curfew and overslept at my boyfriend’s house. She said she’d let me back in on one condition: that I was still a virgin. My boyfriend’s parents won’t let me live with him. I’m currently staying in the Walmart restroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 703

You deserved it 315

The Top

Today, I'm nearly done with my cortisol treatment for a persistent multi-day migraine. Good news: it actually stopped for the last two blissful, pain-free days. Bad news: apparently anything less than the maximum dose of cortisol doesn't prevent me from getting a new migraine. Here we go again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 885

You deserved it 85

Today, my husband and I were unable to exchange rings at our marriage ceremony as his ring was still out being resized. We had continuously waited for the store to call, and had reluctantly decided to just do the ceremony without. As we sat down to lunch after, they called. It was ready. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 805

You deserved it 601

Today, my grandson asked how old I am and whether I'd seen Mammoths "for real" when I was a kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 097

You deserved it 4 511

Today, I was introduced to the girl my current boyfriend went out with while dating me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 319

You deserved it 1 011

Today, I had a huge yard sale. Since I live in a good neighborhood, I decided to leave the stuff out tonight rather than pack it all in for only a few hours. The news didn't say anything about the impending severe thunderstorm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 712

You deserved it 33 809

Today, at my daughter's soccer game, my nephew's dog helped herself to the Snowball I was eating, leaving fur on the side she didn't lick and left it unsalvageable. She peed on the blanket I was sitting on, tried to bite another kid, and went on to pop my kid's soccer ball that she'd used twice since I purchased it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 008

You deserved it 320

Same thing different taste

Jesus wept

Like a virgin

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