Miscellaneous: Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really...

By bribreeeeeezyfreshhh - 06/12/2010 17:03 - United Kingdom

Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 942

You deserved it 27 196

The rhythm of the fight
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Same thing different taste

You OK hon?

By religiunatic - 13/12/2013 17:09 - Canada - Keswick

Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 834

You deserved it 3 130

By properpissed - 03/06/2014 15:36 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was talking to one of my British friends online, and he told me to say "yew anchors" a few times really fast. I'm a fairly stupid person, and wasn't very focused, so I did as he said. When I finally figured what the words meant, my dad had heard and grounded me for cursing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 435

You deserved it 10 167

By phonesmuggler - 18/04/2013 19:30 - United States

Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 887

You deserved it 5 819

Holiday assumptions

By Red Toad - 26/12/2020 20:59 - United States - Litchfield Park

Today, I said a few words to my mom that happened to be similar to something offensive, and she misheard. I tried to tell her, but she was so angry that she assumed I was saying more offensive things. Now she is punishing everybody in the house, and I’m not allowed to speak to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 856

You deserved it 149

Quality family time

By really mature, GRAN - 25/12/2012 20:59 - United States - El Macero

Today, my psycho grandma yelled at me for being an "immature brat" by not offering to wash the dishes after dinner. I reminded her that when I offered last time, she raged at me for being "condescending." She responded by faking a heart attack and getting me indefinitely grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 780

You deserved it 3 078

Proportional response

By Anonymous - 16/10/2020 16:58

Today, our house caught fire. While trying to help my mom get to safety, the word "fuck" accidentally escaped my mouth. Once we were safe, she said I was grounded for swearing. I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 368

You deserved it 177

By booste - 18/10/2009 04:06 - Canada

Today, I was written up because my manager heard me insulting a customer. How did I insult her? I called her grandma. Who did I say this to? My grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 766

You deserved it 2 269

Ironic, isn't it?

By KC. - 25/04/2012 20:06 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 497

You deserved it 8 746

By rosmaizura - 01/10/2010 07:39 - Malaysia

Today, my mom added me on Facebook. She wrote on my wall, for the whole world to see, "Why are you swearing on the internet?! You're grounded". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 437

You deserved it 22 390

By dadyoureacunt - 21/09/2013 13:10 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 523

You deserved it 7 465

DocBastard 38

Monday 6 December 2010 23:26

OP, now say "I'm a ******* moron" five times fast. What does that sound like to you?

WTSchool 0

Monday 6 December 2010 23:09

She probably thought you were smart enough to figure it out. Sorry.

Comments

rattusrattus 18

Tuesday 7 December 2010 1:11

Your grandmother is an evil old lady. And I salute her.

ShananaginsLOL 13

Wednesday 13 February 2013 5:59

Long live grandma bitch

macskapingvin 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 1:17

Well, at least you were outsmarted by your elder and better, not your smartass little brother. ;)

stedfastwolf 11

Tuesday 7 December 2010 1:18

I don't get it

at0micmin3r 23

Tuesday 7 December 2010 1:30

That's totally SOFA KING childish. "BUT GAMMA MADE ME DO ET D:" Really? If she told you to kill yourself, would you?

varkey 7

Tuesday 7 December 2010 1:33

LOL! Awesome grandma

insane1 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 2:21

omg same thing happened to me except was 7 and I was screaming it at the zoo in anger of not being able to figure it out! lol

biebersgirl33 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 2:49

bahahahahahahahaha wow awesome grandma

sabera 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 2:59

hey i don't get the meaning of this ????????????wat does 'sofakingretard' mean?

0opsie 6

Tuesday 7 December 2010 15:39

#59: It's supposed to make you say an ancient Native American chant. When you say "sofa king retarded" it sounds exactly the same. It puts a curse on the person who repeats it, takes away 5 years from their life and gives it to the one who told them to say it. Some people believe in it and some people are very offended by it. The only way to reverse it is to make sure the person who said it out loud stays indoors; which is why her mom grounded her.