Health: Today, my husband pooped the bed for the second time since we've...

By Anonymous - 08/10/2010 05:23 - United States

Today, my husband pooped the bed for the second time since we've been married. We've been married a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 920

You deserved it 5 462

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 08/06/2011 06:55 - United States

Today, my husband and I got married. The only thing that is different so far is that he now thinks that it's okay to shit with the door open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 011

You deserved it 8 736

Just once

By Anonymous - 19/02/2020 20:00

Today, at last, my husband instigated sex for the first time since the honeymoon a few months ago when he started fondling me in bed. Then I realised he was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 974

You deserved it 201

By fun - 16/06/2013 04:54 - United States

Today, my husband threw up on me during our wedding vows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 029

You deserved it 4 585

The language of love

By disgusted - 24/09/2012 19:16 - United Kingdom - Harpenden

Today, my husband asked me to spoon him. He used it as an excuse to start farting on me. Yep, this is my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 928

You deserved it 6 524

Relationship goals

By Anonymous - 17/05/2015 05:10 - United States

Today, my husband missed the toilet again. I would have been less disgusted if he'd peed this time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 508

You deserved it 2 700

By heart broken - 29/12/2013 09:05 - United States

Today, my husband told me yet again that the last two years have been the worst of his life. Our two year anniversary is next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 639

You deserved it 4 777

Wait for the hangover

By Carpet cleaner - 21/02/2012 02:15 - Canada

Today, my husband came home late from drinking with his buddies, only to toss and turn and keep me up for an hour. He then sat up and didn't move for a few minutes. I sat up to see what was wrong, only to see him pissing on the carpet beside our bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 122

You deserved it 2 676

By Wet dreamer - 17/01/2018 19:00

Today, I slept in my boyfriend's room for the first time. I also wet the bed for the first time in a decade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 935

You deserved it 778

By Thanks Honey - 05/06/2013 15:08 - United States

Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 603

You deserved it 5 195

By mmvv - 08/02/2010 05:41 - United States

Today, I found out the hard way that my boyfriend occasionally wets the bed. He's 25 and we're moving in together next month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 426

You deserved it 3 849

Metalman69 0

Friday 8 October 2010 12:04

and you didnt know he had this problem prior to marrying him? did you two not live together before then?

vicki2354 0

Friday 8 October 2010 12:08

omg potty train that man!!!

Comments

scuzzyjimjim 0

Monday 11 October 2010 10:50

that's sick

davidbuseckaka 0

Monday 11 October 2010 18:42

you are so frickin stupid. Must be on welfare!

davidbuseckaka 0

Monday 11 October 2010 18:44

you are so f n stupid. Must be on welfare!

Saiyza 4

Thursday 14 October 2010 0:59

He must be REALLY nervous. O.o

bnsinglesucks38 0

Saturday 16 October 2010 21:06

he is secretly gay and your the cover ....sorry :(

vols0056 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 19:51

hi mr. walrus

Chucklor 0

Wednesday 27 October 2010 4:32

I literally laughed so much! lol

lectricpharaoh 9

Sunday 7 July 2013 6:10

Laughed so hard you shit yourself, did you? If you're the OP's husband, it's good to know you've got a sense of humor about this.

lori_lovee 0

Saturday 30 October 2010 22:30

Eew. Make sure its not a medical thing!

lori_lovee 0

Saturday 30 October 2010 22:42

Get him to a doctor! It could be a serious medical problem you dickface! Yeah, fyl for being a horrible wife!

eyorsdocjr 0

Friday 21 January 2011 5:10

he shit in the bed?? future advice, don't take a lax and a sleeping pill together.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, at work, I handed an old man his drink, and our fingers accidentally brushed. He gave me a creepy wink and a smile, but I ignored it. He's now been sitting in the store for two hours watching me. Only four hours to go until I get off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 828

You deserved it 2 483

Today, I went for dinner and bowling with a woman I met online. The Mexican food was great but my bowels started feeling it during our first game. I slipped on the bowling lane and the impact of my ass hitting the ground made me shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 458

You deserved it 518

The Top

Today, my brother’s cat pissed on my brand new bed. He refuses to replace the mattress, and claims it wasn’t his cat. We only have one cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 153

Today, my family threw me a surprise party. I was so surprised I punched my mom in the face when she screamed SURPRISE! FML

I agree, your life sucks 451

You deserved it 60

Today, I have a girlfriend. Our moms are best friends. Our dads are best friends. Our younger siblings are best friends. Our grandparents have known each other for 70 years. I hate my girlfriend. I have hundreds of texts proving she’s a cheating whore, but I feel trapped by our families' happiness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 727

You deserved it 209

Today, the guy I'm dating took me to a dinner party at a couple's house. Halfway through dinner, I realized they were having the dinner party for the sole purpose of introducing him to their recently single daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 207

You deserved it 1 763

Today, I was down at Disney World. Me and my buddy decided to take our pictures in a photobooth. While in the tiny space, I thought it'd be funny to flash the camera. A women barged in as soon as I did so, screaming "You know there's an outside video feed, right!?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 387

You deserved it 65 577

Today, my parents have deliberately ruined my last 2 relationships, because they want me to get back together with my ex simply because he is my son's dad. Apparently, my son needs his father more than I need a man who won't beat me every time he gets drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 705

You deserved it 2 069