Kids: Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives...

By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 04:18 - United States

Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives in the cakes for my son's 7th birthday party. Over 40 kids came to the party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 594

You deserved it 4 112

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Same thing different taste

By Noname - 14/03/2009 15:16 - United States

Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming to blow out his birthday cake candles. Turns out he was in the other room, quietly changing his disabled friend's diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 452

You deserved it 213 124

By Birthday blues - 13/12/2018 22:00

Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 036

You deserved it 601

By ilikecake - 29/05/2009 11:12 - United Arab Emirates

Today, it was my boyfriend's 24th birthday. His friends were throwing him a surprise party and I was in charge of getting his birthday cake. As a joke, I got it in the shape of a penis, with a graphic marzipan design. Funny, I never knew his overly-conservative parents were invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 386

You deserved it 53 424

Here, have this

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Crystal Lake

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 873

You deserved it 4 909

Kids these days…

By cakehater - 21/08/2011 07:35 - United States

Today, I'm a host at a restaurant. We had a birthday party for a couple of 15 year old boys and their friends. I went to clean the bathroom at the end of my shift and discovered cake everywhere, including all over the urinal. They were even nice enough to draw a smiley on the mirror with icing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 311

You deserved it 2 466

Boundaries

By Anonymous - 24/09/2023 16:00

Today, as I'm 7 months pregnant and craving sweets, I helped myself to my MIL's birthday cake a little early. The family got so angry, they actually made me leave the party. My husband agreed with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 146

You deserved it 2 591

By Anonymous - 06/08/2009 06:13 - Australia

Today, I had to call poison control because my idiot son swallowed a bunch of baking soda to "make a volcano in his tummy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 399

You deserved it 17 297

By Anonymous - 25/01/2013 05:39 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 899

You deserved it 6 338

Great boyfriend, part 2

By thanks a lot - 04/05/2020 05:00

Today, my boyfriend made me a latte. It tasted off, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I drank it. Turns out he put laxatives in it as a prank. The idiot couldn’t just use one or two. He used so many that I had to go to the ER for severe dehydration after puking and shitting for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 928

You deserved it 224

By Anonymous - 16/01/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 970

You deserved it 3 693

evnflr 7

Thursday 26 January 2012 8:51

Now that's a shitty situation.

mama2b3 20

Thursday 26 January 2012 8:53

First of all your husband sounds really immature. Second, over 40 kids!!? Holy crap!

Comments

iiWAN 7

Friday 27 January 2012 14:22

well it could be worse...imagine u had 41 kids on that party ;-)

sparxva 12

Friday 27 January 2012 15:22

Food tampering is a felony in a lot of states. Forty counts of food tampering could send hubby away for a long time.

Evie_fml 14

Friday 27 January 2012 15:45

That's incredibly frickin' dangerous to do to a bunch of kids! What on earth was he thinking? The mind boggles...

BaileySt4 5

Friday 27 January 2012 21:51

And you don't think that's hilarious? How many bathrooms do you have?

Spazz420 7

Friday 27 January 2012 21:54

Technically that's child abuse and he could get it a lot of shit for that! pun intended

AlyssaDemo13 0

Friday 27 January 2012 22:29

Sounds like a crappy day!

zombieman629 0

Saturday 28 January 2012 1:10

Haha thats hella funny but kinda ******

Fylminesawsome 5

Saturday 28 January 2012 5:11

Isn't it a felony to drug someones food?

polkadot3155 6

Saturday 28 January 2012 6:53

and I'm guessing your the lucky one go gets to clean the bathroom..

MiddleThumb 0

Saturday 28 January 2012 7:25

That's hilarious

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